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Thread: Hello from both of us

  1. #1

    Default Hello from both of us

    This is an introduction of me and my girlfriend trying to understand my infantism. I don't have many people to talk to about this, and it is hard for me to reach out. But my girlfriend is very supportive and found this site for me. She doesn't really understand what is like to be an AB or a DL since she isn't either but she is trying to learn about it, the best she can being an outsider looking in.

    My grammar is atrocious, so unless we are typing together (and she corrects my mistakes) my posts will be full of typos. I apologize in advance.

    What I am looking for more than anything is support. I don't understand all of this myself, and I need someone to talk to about it. I feel bad about everything, like it is wrong that I am an AB, and I would like to meet people that have gone through it, or are going through it right now.

    My girlfriend is looking for more understanding about it because she has no experience about it herself. All of her thoughts have been formed from things she sees online or on TV, which at times does not represent any AB/DL in a good light.

  2. #2


    Hey there - welcome to the site, both of you!

    We are primarily a support network, and we frequently get a partner of an ABDL on here looking for advice - both the ABDL and partner generally get very good support and suggestions!

    First things first. Being an ABDL is generally a behaviour learned at young childhood - before you are really aware of anything as a child. There are plenty of studies trying to figure out what causes it, but the general consensus is to think of it like your sexuality - you don't get to choose! Obviously, there are members here that were converted by a friend/partner - they don't generally go through the shame cycle though, as they chose it!

    The majority of members on here have gone through the "awakening" - so I expect you will find limitless support on that issue.

    As for your girlfriend, her best bet is to read through a lot of the forum topics regarding why we are ABDL, and any regarding telling a partner about it. But in a nutshell, it's awesome that she wants to find out more - rather than freaking out about it!

    The best advice I can give her is:
    1. It has nothing to do with real children
    2. The majority of ABDL find the child-like state relaxing and therapeutic. It is generally a stress reliever more than anything.
    3. In a perfect world, she might choose to baby you (if that's what you want). That said, anything more than simply accepting you as an ABDL is an awesome situation to be in!
    4. The typical tv/online show is designed to make good TV - most ABDL keep this part of their life very secret; those who choose to show it to the world either show it in an extreme light, or the host ridicules them for trying to explain it properly.
    5. There is very much an ABDL spectrum - the actual needs/practices vary significantly across the population.

    Anyway, I wish the two of you the best of luck, and hope you find everything you're looking for!


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