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Thread: My current situation

  1. #1

    Default My current situation

    Well to start off, I want to say that for the most part I am loving it here. There are so many nice people and having a place like this to come and even just browse has helped me deal with stuff a lot lately. I little while ago I posted asking for some advice about how to help my fiancee with my likings. While some were nice about it I was rather saddened by those who pretty much just told me to drop her. I tried making it clear that we are TRUELY in love, but I guess I just had to say it. There is no way I would leave her over something like diapers, and while she still is far from comfortable with even the idea, she has yet to leave me over them.

    Sorry, I really wanted to address that as it has bugged me but wanted to say more along the lines of this that I did not think would fit in just making a reply to my other post. Now that I have that off my chest, I real quick would like to thank those who have been nice about it, i don't know if you know how much I really appreciate that.

    Now, as I told in my other post, i think, shortly after telling my then girlfiend that i enjoyed wearing diapers, she made me promise not to wear them again, and out of love for her I did. Well that was several years ago, and over time I would get urges for them and try to talk to her about them and she would kind of retreat. Recently, however, something happened that I would get urges for diapers quite often, and finally after a lot of long and deep discussions, she and I have started more to come to terms with who or what I am.

    She is still extremely uncomfortable about the entire idea and therefore does not let me wear still, but she is being more open about it now. I guess what I want to know is, for those who don't get to wear diapers often, how do you deal with it? Just this last week, I woke up one night and couldn't get back to sleep because thoughts of diapers were stuck in my head. Because that may seem overly obsessive, I want to make a note that diapers are not all I usually think about.

  2. #2


    Well, yeah, I would say diapers for most people here is not "all they usually think about". However, you're being denied any outlet for this, and so it's going to become bigger and bigger of an issue until you wind up partaking. Then you'll feel guilty because you will have broken your promise to her.

    You say "people that do not get to wear diapers often"... are you implying that you wear (albeit rarely) and just don't tell her?

    Do you think such an ultimatum is fair?

    Do you think she really loves you if she cannot tolerate what is essentially a "bad/gross/weird habit" to her?

    I said something similar to someone else here and they were greatly offended by it for some reason, but I'll say it again... if there's no compromise on either end... that means one or both persons is saying "I love you but not enough to do X". e.g. "I love you but not enough to completely stop wearing diapers for you" and/or "I love you but not enough to tolerate you wearing diapers ever". That's the fact of the matter. So which is it? First? Second? Both? It sounds like you are willing to compromise by raring less frequently or not pushing her to participate. Where's the compromise on her part? I mean she's not even saying "Ok... you can do it but only ${some.arbitrary.amount.of.time} and you should only do it when I'm not around and basically slink around in the shadows in shame because I find you repulsive"... just flat out "No you can't do this."

    Does that mean you should just "drop her"? No. But you should consider all options. Be more forceful. "Look, honey, this is not something I can just take an ultimatum on... this is something I want to do. Your forbidding me from doing it is not going to change the fact that I want to do it, so all you're doing is exerting control over me and making it something I think more about than I normally would. How about we try to come to a middle ground instead?" At which point you may find there is no middle ground. Or you do.

    Otherwise you are going to, for the rest of your life, have to deal with this issue. It won't go away. There's not a magic bullet that's going to make you happy with denying yourself something that you want other than convincing yourself that you don't actually want it. And good luck with that. How do people deal with such things? When it all comes down to it, they suffer. That's really all there is to it. How much are you willing to suffer just to present to her a false reality: that you don't like wearing diapers? That's for you to decide

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