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Thread: Hewwos

  1. #1
    BecomingAbaby

    Default Hewwos

    hi i am in my mid 20's been wearing diapers for over 10 years now been 247 for about 2 years now and will soon be living with my daddy who plans to baby me 247. i know sounds like a dream, well im nervous cause its coming true.

    so ive come here for friends to talk to about this lifestyle im diving into, anyone else done this?

    my biggest issue is i have strong social anxiety, this is all well and easy for me so long as i stay inside the house, but of course we cant do that 247 he couldnt stand it, even though id be happy to be a recluse, he wants to go out and be active, just being out in public with a diaper on under jeans makes me so nervous i sweat,

    not that it stops me though, i just wish it wasnt so hard mentaly.

    this is probably like the worst intro thread ever, i dont realy know what else to say, this is whats on my mind atm so there you go.

  2. #2
    acorn

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by BecomingAbaby View Post
    Yup, this thread probability will go down like a lead zepplin. If it should fail, there would be only one real reason for that. adisc is a support community, how we work is that we say something about ourselves, this is usually done in the Introduction section.

    The idea of an introduction is to give the other members an idea of you as a person, people relate to people with whom they have something in common. On this site we do not care if you have three heads or only one eye. To further that we will not ask for your; Name, Social Security No' or bank details. All we want to know is that you are genuine.

    Let me start the ball rolling, I have been married and currently am happily divorced. I have an interest in motorbikes. I like two stroke, stink wheel oil burners. I do not appreciate eco-friendly, over engineered, lardy four stroke agricultural junk. At the risk of sounding like a puritan, I believe Harley's some bikes are ok, on the farm and are ideal for tasks like towing slurrey spreaders and such.

    Do you have an interest or hobby you might share with us?

  3. #3

    Default

    First of all, it wasn't a bad intro at all, from the standpoint of why you are here and how we might be able to help. Both are useful and therefore this intro frames the issues nicely.

    We are a support site and it is natural to plunge in here with details of what sort of support you seek; it isn't maybe so obvious to start by introducing yourself in a more rounded way, and get down to the nitty gritty of your problems once we have come to know each other a bit. If this is so it is our mistake: we should make it more obvious we want to chill and relax a bit and small-talk some... then deal with the heavy stuff in new threads in adult baby forum or maybe mature topics. Now I will pause to reply to acorn:



    There is kind of an unspoken notion on Adisc that self-recrimination off the hop, saying things like "I shouldn't say this" or "I know I'll get negrepped but here goes" or excuse my compulsive leet yse and distrust f my spll chkr" are not good ways to go about posting; if you feel a thing is bad or breaks rules or is poor then it shouldn't be written, or should be re-written.

    My impression is that last bit you chose to say because you ARE mindful of our rules and fear you may be in breach; don't sweat it. We emphasize "The Rules" but sometimes we put a bit too much of the fear of God in new members who fear to tread among us. I would say that it is as though we mark a straight and narrow path, well marked and with safety rails [ listen child, to the safety rail] where the straight and narrow borders cliff-faces.

    You might want to give us a better idea of how we can help out; you have raised your anxiety about going outside, and not wanting this anxiety to separate you and your daddy from doing things together, as well as apart. It would be a cruel and unusual universe where being padded prevented you from shoveling the snow when it's your turn! - and apt to irk your man. Irking your man isn't what any of us wants.

    Just checked your profile and it says

    Straight, DL, Asexual
    which makes your intimate involvement with said daddy raise eyebrows. (By 'intimate' I don't mean necessarily sexual; he may be an asexual guy into caretaking; he may be gay where you are not. Whatever.) But people may wonder, and rain down upon your head gasps and cries of disbelief as you state what appears to be a glaring inconsistency. Because we are an all-embracing community over matters of sexuality and we assume you know this, we assume if you are gay you would not have an issue saying so; so while your sexuality is your own business and not to be criticized by us on its own merits, we ARE apt, as a rule (damn rules again!) to pounce inconsistencies very much like Judge Judy.

    Frankly, you may well be the playtoy of your daddy's dreams, and this 24/7 affair is as much his thing as yours and if he is gay or bi and you are not, well... hey I'm not asking, just observing. Your username does kind of encapsulate your anxiety issues, suggesting you are in two minds about how far you want to go with being babied and kept padded all day and night. If this is so then it makes sense for you to seek our support and consideration; but I will warn you, we get people who purport as truthful masturbation fantasies of theirs: and people may well think this of you.

    Such people do this, I think, in the hope we will play along and add flesh to the fantasy in their head, very like a live person talking to you in phone sex makes that more real.

    And Adisc takes a dim view of being used to facilitate such fantasizing; I am willing to take you at your word now: consider it supportive of me to explain ahead of time why you may get unpleasant responses from other quarters.

    I would show your daddy your post, and get him to make his own intro thread; he is the one you should be most eager to keep lines of communication open with.

    Let us then consider a couple of options: first, agoraphobia and its like are issues that belong in mature topics, especially as an adult relationship is involved. I don't mean to state I think you and daddy are lovers; but whether you are or not is moot: daddy/role-played infant is very much an adult relationship. And already rocky at that, with your reclusive tendencies, nervousness about being daddied (I sense boundary issues) and even unsureness about exactly how this "lifestyle" is meant to fit inside your own head. Or what you are letting yourself in for. If he is supposed to make a fantasy come true, whether his or yours, it sounds like you fear the unknown, and him holding the reins.

    Second thing, again , since I am taking you at your word, I figure there is indeed a lot we can help you with: and part of that is to do with going out padded; there is much that has been said on that on Adisc: see our articles. Your anxiety is no doubt just as intense as much as are your intensely nice feelings from being padded. I understand both sets of feelings. I understand agoraphobia, seen it, though don't have it.

    You say you have been wearing 10 years? Full time for 2 years? Since early teens, maybe 15 I am guessing... but still are not used to it enough to cope? There are issues for sure going on.

    I have a close friend who "lived the lifestyle" and had a daddy/mommy, and on the strength of his story I am accepting yours; his story is posted within this site's pages. His first crack at the lifestyle ended in tears.

    Anyway I said "a couple of options." You should consider a different username; as accurate as this one may be per your situation, it'll turn people off. Also, assuming you do stick around to grapple with your issues, a new intro (you could keep this thread, and add a new intro post) that expands on you as a person - what you watch or play as a recluse, background on those 10 diapered years, your musical tastes, and all the things you hinted at on your profile would suit.

    And being mid-20's with a decade of diapered experience, you should have a lot to offer us. Adisc is a 2-way support street, narrow though its lanes may be.

    ps my song quote above is from this:

    You might want to say something somewhere about all the ins and outs of the 2 years' of being padded: Disability? Income? how you found your daddy? Schooling? Work? How you got supplies? Delivered? All that good stuff.
    Last edited by Raccoon; 20-Apr-2011 at 05:05.

  4. #4

    Default

    I think your intro is acceptable because you have told us something important and that is that you need help. This site is the best diaper site for support, so you came to the right place.

    I've been around the block a few times and have lived with other males, so I have some questions. Since you have a male caretaker, is this a good relationship? How long have you know this person, and why are you living with him and not either at home with parents, or on your own? Since you are uncomfortable about going out, and especially going out diapered, how much pressure is your caretaker putting on you? I ask because I've been in similar positions when I was in my teens. I was Borderline Personality, and males like us get pushed into doing things that can be harmful.

    I think we need more history from you to answer your question, though I don't wish to sound like I am pushing myself into your business. Without any more information, I would say that you shouldn't do anything that would make you feel uncomfortable. It's also important to realize that this relationship may not last a long time. If you are exposed as an adult baby to the outside world, and then you are dumped into that same world, what happens then? Be careful.

  5. #5
    BecomingAbaby

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by acorn View Post
    Yup, this thread probability will go down like a lead zepplin. If it should fail, there would be only one real reason for that. adisc is a support community, how we work is that we say something about ourselves, this is usually done in the Introduction section.

    The idea of an introduction is to give the other members an idea of you as a person, people relate to people with whom they have something in common. On this site we do not care if you have three heads or only one eye. To further that we will not ask for your; Name, Social Security No' or bank details. All we want to know is that you are genuine.
    i am sorry if my intro post just wasn't descriptive enough, i just really didn't know what else to say, kinda like writers block, i was just really really nervous.



    Quote Originally Posted by acorn View Post
    Let me start the ball rolling, I have been married and currently am happily divorced. I have an interest in motorbikes. I like two stroke, stink wheel oil burners. I do not appreciate eco-friendly, over engineered, lardy four stroke agricultural junk. At the risk of sounding like a puritan, I believe Harley's some bikes are ok, on the farm and are ideal for tasks like towing slurrey spreaders and such.

    Do you have an interest or hobby you might share with us?
    thanks for the help on subjects i can detail about myself,

    i have never been married only dated around plenty in my life, i have only ever dated because i felt like my peers expected me too, like i wouldn't be considered normal if i didn't, i honestly never wanted to date anyone and resigned myself to being alone my entire life, i knew that was how i would be most happy as young as 10. but that was only because i never thought i would find someone who would be so willing to encourage and help me to be whatever i want to be, which is why i now have a daddy.

    i have an interest in snowboarding, its about the only thing i can call a hobby (unless you count the pursuit of knowledge) and i absolutely love it, when i snowboard i feel like god is carrying me down the mountain, kinda hard to describe it, i prefer distance boarding rather then tricks or stunt parks, i often do my snowboarding out in the wilderness where no one will hear my screams i know i know, that's dangerous, my mom reminds me every time i go,

    i don't really have an interest in motorbikes but i would like to own a crotch rocket I'm a speed man.





    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    First of all, it wasn't a bad intro at all, from the standpoint of why you are here and how we might be able to help. Both are useful and therefore this intro frames the issues nicely.

    We are a support site and it is natural to plunge in here with details of what sort of support you seek; it isn't maybe so obvious to start by introducing yourself in a more rounded way, and get down to the nitty gritty of your problems once we have come to know each other a bit. If this is so it is our mistake: we should make it more obvious we want to chill and relax a bit and small-talk some... then deal with the heavy stuff in new threads in adult baby forum or maybe mature topics. Now I will pause to reply to acorn:
    that totally makes sense i apologize for just cutting to the chase like that, support/help/advice is absolutely the reason i came to this site signed up and began the intro post, i should have put more thought into how the site would desire i flow my intro, rather then just cutting to the chase like i did.



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post


    There is kind of an unspoken notion on Adisc that self-recrimination off the hop, saying things like "I shouldn't say this" or "I know I'll get negrepped but here goes" or excuse my compulsive leet yse and distrust f my spll chkr" are not good ways to go about posting; if you feel a thing is bad or breaks rules or is poor then it shouldn't be written, or should be re-written.

    My impression is that last bit you chose to say because you ARE mindful of our rules and fear you may be in breach; don't sweat it. We emphasize "The Rules" but sometimes we put a bit too much of the fear of God in new members who fear to tread among us. I would say that it is as though we mark a straight and narrow path, well marked and with safety rails [ listen child, to the safety rail] where the straight and narrow borders cliff-faces.
    Noted. ;D



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    You might want to give us a better idea of how we can help out; you have raised your anxiety about going outside, and not wanting this anxiety to separate you and your daddy from doing things together, as well as apart. It would be a cruel and unusual universe where being padded prevented you from shoveling the snow when it's your turn! - and apt to irk your man. Irking your man isn't what any of us wants.

    Just checked your profile and it says which makes your intimate involvement with said daddy raise eyebrows. (By 'intimate' I don't mean necessarily sexual; he may be an asexual guy into caretaking; he may be gay where you are not. Whatever.) But people may wonder, and rain down upon your head gasps and cries of disbelief as you state what appears to be a glaring inconsistency. Because we are an all-embracing community over matters of sexuality and we assume you know this, we assume if you are gay you would not have an issue saying so; so while your sexuality is your own business and not to be criticized by us on its own merits, we ARE apt, as a rule (damn rules again!) to pounce inconsistencies very much like Judge Judy.

    Frankly, you may well be the playtoy of your daddy's dreams, and this 24/7 affair is as much his thing as yours and if he is gay or bi and you are not, well... hey I'm not asking, just observing. Your username does kind of encapsulate your anxiety issues, suggesting you are in two minds about how far you want to go with being babied and kept padded all day and night. If this is so then it makes sense for you to seek our support and consideration; but I will warn you, we get people who purport as truthful masturbation fantasies of theirs: and people may well think this of you.

    Such people do this, I think, in the hope we will play along and add flesh to the fantasy in their head, very like a live person talking to you in phone sex makes that more real.

    And Adisc takes a dim view of being used to facilitate such fantasizing; I am willing to take you at your word now: consider it supportive of me to explain ahead of time why you may get unpleasant responses from other quarters.

    I would show your daddy your post, and get him to make his own intro thread; he is the one you should be most eager to keep lines of communication open with.

    Let us then consider a couple of options: first, agoraphobia and its like are issues that belong in mature topics, especially as an adult relationship is involved. I don't mean to state I think you and daddy are lovers; but whether you are or not is moot: daddy/role-played infant is very much an adult relationship. And already rocky at that, with your reclusive tendencies, nervousness about being daddied (I sense boundary issues) and even unsureness about exactly how this "lifestyle" is meant to fit inside your own head. Or what you are letting yourself in for. If he is supposed to make a fantasy come true, whether his or yours, it sounds like you fear the unknown, and him holding the reins.

    Second thing, again , since I am taking you at your word, I figure there is indeed a lot we can help you with: and part of that is to do with going out padded; there is much that has been said on that on Adisc: see our articles. Your anxiety is no doubt just as intense as much as are your intensely nice feelings from being padded. I understand both sets of feelings. I understand agoraphobia, seen it, though don't have it.

    You say you have been wearing 10 years? Full time for 2 years? Since early teens, maybe 15 I am guessing... but still are not used to it enough to cope? There are issues for sure going on.

    I have a close friend who "lived the lifestyle" and had a daddy/mommy, and on the strength of his story I am accepting yours; his story is posted within this site's pages. His first crack at the lifestyle ended in tears.

    Anyway I said "a couple of options." You should consider a different username; as accurate as this one may be per your situation, it'll turn people off. Also, assuming you do stick around to grapple with your issues, a new intro (you could keep this thread, and add a new intro post) that expands on you as a person - what you watch or play as a recluse, background on those 10 diapered years, your musical tastes, and all the things you hinted at on your profile would suit.

    And being mid-20's with a decade of diapered experience, you should have a lot to offer us. Adisc is a 2-way support street, narrow though its lanes may be.

    ps my song quote above is from this:

    You might want to say something somewhere about all the ins and outs of the 2 years' of being padded: Disability? Income? how you found your daddy? Schooling? Work? How you got supplies? Delivered? All that good stuff.

    so I've just typed out like 1000 words to reply to you when i realized A LOT of what i typed is not exactly pg-13, trying to define my relationship with my daddy and all that. so should i just retype it all being very careful with what i say? (which will make it difficult to clearly answer some of your questions)
    or is there a different sub-forum we can talk on which is 18 and over? (that'd be easier xD)

    ---------- Post added at 04:06 ---------- Previous post was at 03:33 ----------



    Quote Originally Posted by dogboy View Post
    I think your intro is acceptable because you have told us something important and that is that you need help. This site is the best diaper site for support, so you came to the right place.

    I've been around the block a few times and have lived with other males, so I have some questions. Since you have a male caretaker, is this a good relationship?
    yes it is the best relationship i have ever had. the one and only I've ever had that i can see lasting to the point of one of our deaths.



    Quote Originally Posted by dogboy View Post
    How long have you know this person, and why are you living with him and not either at home with parents, or on your own?
    have known him for almost 7 years now, I'm not actually living with him yet, we move in together in July, we see each other about 5 days a week, always in my own home since i live alone, there's no where else we can meet with privacy. i moved out of my parents house when i was 17, because they drive me flipping nuts, when i lived with them they absolutely demanded to know every detail of my life, out of concern, made having this relationship very difficult, i had to lie to them a lot since they are unapproving of homosexuality and I'm sure they would not approve of me being 247 ab. i want to live with my daddy so we can see each other more, and he can more easily take care of me, the only reason we dont live together already is that we have been waiting for his daughter to graduate and move out on her own at her own pace, he even has told me and encouraged me to just move in right away saying she would not mind and would be accepting, i have been the one who has told him no way in hell and he needs to hide every detail of it from her, i just want her to continue feeling like she has a normal dad a normal life and no pressure to move out, if i moved in it would complicate things unnecessarily



    Quote Originally Posted by dogboy View Post
    Since you are uncomfortable about going out, and especially going out diapered, how much pressure is your caretaker putting on you? I ask because I've been in similar positions when I was in my teens. I was Borderline Personality, and males like us get pushed into doing things that can be harmful.
    he hasn't put very much pressure on me at all, any time i say i just cant he totally understands and drops it, in fact i put way to much pressure on myself,

    here's an example, the other day he wanted to go out to eat at a sit down restaurant, knowing in my head how nervous i get when we do that i said to him "ok ya sure lets do it" we drive to the place and as we pull into the parking lot i see in the windows the place is packed, very brightly lit, all the seating as jammed up against each other so there's no booths or privacy of any kind, any word uttered is probably heard across the entire building. seeing this i start breathing heavy feeling faint and pondering running off into the woods to die, i say to him "do we have too? its pretty busy in there, if you really wanna then its ok lets do it" he immediately pulls back out of the parking lot and we go get fast food, even though he despises fast food, he tells me " its ok i shouldn't have put you in that position i forgot how you feel in places like that its my fault"

    whats odd is now i feel much much worse, i desperately want him to be happy too i want him to eat his steak he's been craving i want him to go to the public places he wants to and i definitely don't want to hold him back nor do i want him to go without me cause i want every minute of his time and i know he wants my every minute also.

    i spent the rest of that night beating myself up that i stopped him from going in there and getting his steak.


    this example is actually pretty common occurrence between us, he wants to go do something i say ok we get there i freak out he understands and i feel bad and beat myself up,

    and there was a time when i wouldn't say ok i would just be honest and tell him i didn't want to every time, but after awhile he got stir crazy being inside so much, it started to bug him, so that's why i make the effort now to say ok and try to go through with it. it doesn't always fail, sometimes i shut my mouth we go into the cafe/etc we eat/etc and leave the place in peace, proving to me my anxiety is overblown, yet it doesn't go away.



    Quote Originally Posted by dogboy View Post
    I think we need more history from you to answer your question, though I don't wish to sound like I am pushing myself into your business. Without any more information, I would say that you shouldn't do anything that would make you feel uncomfortable. It's also important to realize that this relationship may not last a long time. If you are exposed as an adult baby to the outside world, and then you are dumped into that same world, what happens then? Be careful.
    yes i have of course thought of that, im not to worried about it though, cause that is a fear and i do not want fear to stop me from my desires, when the day comes we separate be it death or lost interest, i will just have to go back to the vanilla lifestyle of struggling to find a 9 to 5 job to pay the bills and survive, as depressing as i know that lifestyle is from years of doing it.

    i would rather death then to stop myself from this lifestyle I'm diving into. i just desire it so badly and the opportunity is here and the party desires it also, i feel i must.

  6. #6

    Default

    I thought you sounded genuine; glad to know it's so.

    I don't get true panic attacks but have known many who did; so I sympathize and honor the intensity of feelings about dying or running away. Not that those are actual options; I honor the feelings, the urge. I am disturbed by your frequent reference to having a choice between death and giving up the lifestyle, but I understand it; we obsessives tend to think in terms of extremes emotionally. Often we can not see a middle path, blinded as we are by light one side, and on the other, darkness visible. All the rest in shadow lies: we can not see to see.

    I knew this gal in rl who spent months venturing outside only in the company of a therapist: walking down the block was very trying; public transit was right out.

    Now, I am glad we are in adult baby and not in Greetings forum any more. You might want to make an intro post there describing all that good stuff about you that you could see telling to a mixed age audience. After all, while you have pressing issues and needs, and seem happy to get some guidance, there is more to you than your relationship with your daddy, and I hope much of the support you can use is by way of people just being friendly and talking over non-heavy stuff. Just being among folks who "get it" , who are tolerant and embracing toward alternate lifestyles. (furry, asexual, swingers, all sorts, celibate monks keeping vows of silence) is a big part of support, and at the end of the day outweighs the benefits of things like advice, counseling, and being told how many times you can retape a Kendall without the tapes losing all stickiness.

    I am heartened by your implicit recognition that sexuality is fluid, especially among such as we. On here are many whose sexual identity isn't cast in cement; just realizing that it needn't be set in stone means you are well on your way, to being able to tackle other issues; you seem to have a better than usual grasp of a large part of who you are.

    I know guys who like hetero-sex but masturbate to gay porn. There are girls too, who are happy with their rl hubby but like the look of yaoi. Again, all sorts of guys can have wives yet enjoy the company of other guys acting out a furry persona, whatever the sex of the fursuit. Sexual identities are simple for many but complicated for many others; "normal" doesn't equate to "healthy" and you can guess which I think is better.

    It comes as a surprise to many that they can be happily and faithfully married to a wife but "play" outside of the marriage. That different partners provide for different kinds of intimacy. And fidelity is an arrangement between people who get to determine just what fidelity means to them; if they are true to their agreement, and enter it with the terms made clear, as informed, consenting adults, let no man put this happy setup asunder!

    So yeah a married guy could see other guys on the side if his wife accepts this; I call this "thinking outside the box." *giggle giggle*

    Your daddy sounds cool; and very clearly he has already grappled with issues you are now facing; he should be able to help you through your own issues.

    I know it is part and parcel of being ab/dl to feel shameful as well as excited; I think I have an inkling what cross-dressers feel when they know that they are sporting ladies' undies secretly. But however your anxiety arises, it is spilling over into a generalized anxiety and sounds to me like a full-blown agoraphobia; diapers be damned. This is a problem that needs professional attention; online we can encourage and affirm and cheer from the sidelines, but -with your daddy's help - you must undertake responsibility to be able to cope away from the house, away from daddy, out in the world. Sounds like he would agree.

    I am sure he'll help out. Good luck to you; good things are ahead. (Some of them in this thread.)

    Consider: some people have the opposite problem, they are exhibitionists and force the world to know what they are wearing by what's peeking out at the waistline or by smell. Some go to public loos and flush away their clothes to force themselves to be subject to public shame and ridicule.

    I wonder: if between the two of you you could spring for a holiday, why not find an ab meetup (I heard of this happening in Vermont and Amsterdam) and go? Or a furry convention? (Some furs are babyfurs. A few are oldfur plus diaperfur, like me. And most fursuiters are diapered underneath. I suppose that it may make you feel more at ease knowing most of the people around you are padded. And by being out of state nobody would know you anyway. And your relationship is in its early stages: beginning with a holiday surely would get things off to a good start before getting into the domestic routine. A lot of the anxiety must be over other peoples' attitudes and thoughts; what if you KNEW they weren't judging you, or even were approving?

    As to wearing diapers in public let me refer you to my own cubbie's article

    http://www.adisc.org/forum/content/1...rs-public.html

    He is a wealth of information on all kinds of things you have brought up, far more expert and experienced than I.
    Last edited by Raccoon; 21-Apr-2011 at 01:32.

  7. #7
    BecomingAbaby

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    Now, I am glad we are in adult baby and not in Greetings forum any more. You might want to make an intro post there describing all that good stuff about you that you could see telling to a mixed age audience.
    on that Que i will now finish that rated R response i hesitated to type earlier, get ready to read a BOOK, either that or leave the thread now as i overwhelmingly ramble on for 5 hours, you'll find that i can be short but when prompted i am very long winded



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    You might want to give us a better idea of how we can help out; you have raised your anxiety about going outside, and not wanting this anxiety to separate you and your daddy from doing things together, as well as apart. It would be a cruel and unusual universe where being padded prevented you from shoveling the snow when it's your turn! - and apt to irk your man. Irking your man isn't what any of us wants.
    typical psychoanalytical question, "well what do you think is wrong with you?" this is were the psychiatrist is basically saying he needs help helping me to help him help me while i help myself no really though, ill try to sum it up somehow,

    from your example im the kind of person who when daddy asks me to go shovel the snow will whine a bit unless i realize he's done it and its my turn, ill readily and happily go do it, but while im out there ill be chastising myself in my own head with things like "everyone can tell what is under my pants" or "there probably all laughing and now i have to avoid the people who live in this town for fear they'll recognize me from that day they passed by while i shoveled snow with padded pants." and for years ill recall that day like a nightmare, even though in reality i know, nobody saw/could tell/ would even care.

    so why do i stress myself like that? i dont realy know, i cant seem to silence the fears in my head, in action i can overcome them but in mind they torment me to tears.





    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    Just checked your profile and it says which makes your intimate involvement with said daddy raise eyebrows
    i am open and bi, but as far as desire actually goes I'm about as asexual as it gets.



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    (By 'intimate' I don't mean necessarily sexual; he may be an asexual guy into caretaking; he may be gay where you are not. Whatever.) But people may wonder, and rain down upon your head gasps and cries of disbelief as you state what appears to be a glaring inconsistency. Because we are an all-embracing community over matters of sexuality and we assume you know this, we assume if you are gay you would not have an issue saying so; so while your sexuality is your own business and not to be criticized by us on its own merits, we ARE apt, as a rule (damn rules again!) to pounce inconsistencies very much like Judge Judy.

    Frankly, you may well be the playtoy of your daddy's dreams, and this 24/7 affair is as much his thing as yours and if he is gay or bi and you are not, well... hey I'm not asking, just observing.
    i am happy to answer, and glad to hear your observations, i understand your not asking or prying but id like people to understand me here so i can better get some free advice

    only wearing diapers or being babied gets my goat, not a thing else does, been that way my whole life, i have known i wanted back in diapers since the day potty training started for me at 3

    when i met daddy i was experimenting he absolutely loves babieing/diapering me as much as i do, but he also likes a bit of passionate.... butt sex, lol, was hard to outright type that, mostly cause im afraid its inappropriate but this is the 18 and over section i guess right?

    this was not hard for me at all the first year or two i was with him since i was experimenting but the more i did it the more i knew it just aint my thing, however it is his, so i am more than happy to oblige him when i can bring myself to it. that said he hasnt got any for about a year and i feel horrible, this is another thing i beat myself up for in my head, he doesnt complain at all, hes told me plenty of times he's more then happy to just be my daddy forever even if he never gets sex again, but i know what its like not to get all your desires and i cant do that to him, i dont know why i leer away from it so bad when we do it, it feels good and i dont get guilt or regret when its over its all just fine and good, but bringing myself to the activity just feels like its. not what i wanna do...



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    Your username does kind of encapsulate your anxiety issues, suggesting you are in two minds about how far you want to go with being babied and kept padded all day and night. If this is so then it makes sense for you to seek our support and consideration;
    nailed it.

    i am a gemini, so i guess being of two minds is in my nature, if i didnt pause frequently to tell the voice in my head that he is me and i am him then i would turn straight schizophrenic.

    i want to regress as much as possible just the progress ive made thus far has been the greatest feeling i have ever felt my entire life, the greatest time of my life. and all the while never ceasing is the other half of my brain screaming what the hell!!! the emotional feeling sensing side of my brain knows this is nothing ill ever stop, the calculating measuring side of my brain recognizes my deep obsession/infatuation with regression but can never understand it and seemingly will never stop trying too.

    those two hemispheres of my brain are in an epic never ending battle and at the same time have their own sorts of truce's (now I'm really sounding schizophrenic ) i want them to balance, i want peace in my mind and i want to continue my regressive lifestyle, this is my goal, this is where i need help. i love both sides of my mind they both serve me so well, but one side demands feeling the other side demands reason, and i have yet to get a single reason for this lifestyle yet, other then the reason of feeling itself, and my reasoning brain doesn't like that lack of reasoning.



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    but I will warn you, we get people who purport as truthful masturbation fantasies of theirs: and people may well think this of you. Such people do this, I think, in the hope we will play along and add flesh to the fantasy in their head, very like a live person talking to you in phone sex makes that more real.

    And Adisc takes a dim view of being used to facilitate such fantasizing; I am willing to take you at your word now: consider it supportive of me to explain ahead of time why you may get unpleasant responses from other quarters.
    ya i know i figured that was a risk, but idc its no biggy, no worries mate im no troll and i dont like trolls nor do i feed them. thank you for taking me on my word i really appreciate it,



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    I would show your daddy your post, and get him to make his own intro thread; he is the one you should be most eager to keep lines of communication open with.
    oh yes, im very often pushing him to communicate more, he's pretty quiet, always the type to shove things inside and ignore anything negative focus on the positive,

    and im always the type to criticize analyze and vocalize anything and everything i can possible fit through my senses and mind.

    ive told him that ive made this post and i explain what i have said and my purpose, he is encouraging of course. hopefully hell get the time to pop on and read it.



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    Let us then consider a couple of options: first, agoraphobia and its like are issues that belong in mature topics, especially as an adult relationship is involved. I don't mean to state I think you and daddy are lovers; but whether you are or not is moot: daddy/role-played infant is very much an adult relationship. And already rocky at that, with your reclusive tendencies, nervousness about being daddied (I sense boundary issues) and even unsureness about exactly how this "lifestyle" is meant to fit inside your own head. Or what you are letting yourself in for. If he is supposed to make a fantasy come true, whether his or yours, it sounds like you fear the unknown, and him holding the reins.
    i do believe ive got the agoraphobia,

    im not really nervous at all about being daddied behind closed doors, outside them though im incredibly nervous,

    im not sure i understand why you sense boundary issues or what you mean by it, really i think ive happily handed over all boundaries to my daddy,

    i am definitely unsure about how this lifestyle is meant to fit inside my own head,

    i am somewhat but not totaly unsure of what i am letting myself in for,

    fearing the unkown is about as common as apple pie, i try hard not to let that get me to much but cant say it aint there sometimes,

    which of our fantasies it is we are acting out we have done pretty well to communicate to each other so im pretty sure i comprehend him there. our two fantasies are pretty much the same, except his is not so reclusive behind doors, and with the very rare and occasional sex, otherwise our goal is the same, make me a baby

    and yes i big time fear him holding the reigns however im confident he can successfully do so and wants to happily.




    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    Second thing, again , since I am taking you at your word, I figure there is indeed a lot we can help you with: and part of that is to do with going out padded; there is much that has been said on that on Adisc: see our articles. Your anxiety is no doubt just as intense as much as are your intensely nice feelings from being padded. I understand both sets of feelings. I understand agoraphobia, seen it, though don't have it.
    nailed it again, man your really smart, i mean that, as far as internet forums go (and believe ive spent many hours on them over the years) your about the best poster ive ever talked to

    i love you



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    You say you have been wearing 10 years? Full time for 2 years? Since early teens, maybe 15 I am guessing... but still are not used to it enough to cope? There are issues for sure going on.
    oh yes, yes indeed, while living with my parents i had packages of diapers hidden in my room constantly from the very start of getting an allowance, 15 is about when i started wearing them every single night in hopes of becoming a bedwetter, im still not,

    the last 2 years i have not worked, which is why i've been able to be full time all this time, income only dried up last month, savings dry up by end of this year which hopefully we plan to have me in his home by then and he will be taking on full support, we are considering even putting me as a dependent on him during tax filing, ive reminded him countless times if money ever gets tight or he ever just wants more just say the word and im going back to work lickity split, but i am happier this way and he has said many times he is happier to have me the way i wanna be.

    and yes after all this time wearing diapers i still have much trouble coping in the public light,



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    I have a close friend who "lived the lifestyle" and had a daddy/mommy, and on the strength of his story I am accepting yours; his story is posted within this site's pages. His first crack at the lifestyle ended in tears.
    i am sorry to hear it ended for him, when we strive for the things we want most we will attain the most happiness and if we lose it we will experience the most sadness. . this world is to cruel to often .



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    Anyway I said "a couple of options." You should consider a different username; as accurate as this one may be per your situation, it'll turn people off.
    yes you are right and i have pondered very hard on this, probably more then its worth even though i know your right, there is some unexplainable feeling inside me saying i should keep it, i dont know why, gut feeling i guess, odd isnt it? the name seems so trollish i know but for some reason i just like it to much to let it go,



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    Also, assuming you do stick around to grapple with your issues, a new intro (you could keep this thread, and add a new intro post) that expands on you as a person - what you watch or play as a recluse, background on those 10 diapered years, your musical tastes, and all the things you hinted at on your profile would suit.
    since this threads been moved outta the intro section i went ahead and did this with a new thread back in there.



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    And being mid-20's with a decade of diapered experience, you should have a lot to offer us. Adisc is a 2-way support street, narrow though its lanes may be.

    ps my song quote above is from this:

    You might want to say something somewhere about all the ins and outs of the 2 years' of being padded: Disability? Income? how you found your daddy? Schooling? Work? How you got supplies? Delivered? All that good stuff.
    hilarious song, hadn't seen that before, i may be singing it for years now.

    no disability, incomes been fine soon to dry up this year, i worked full time the last 10 years, sucked big time,

    schooling i have a GED AND a high school diploma, i left high school sophomore year and got the GED to start working early, while working i found a program through a community college to take tests and earn the high school diploma, so i had that too before i even would have been a senior, im rather proud i got both documents before my peers could get their one.

    i found my daddy online actually, just surfing live chat room for abdl, someone in one asked if anyone was in his region of the us, after a few weeks of chatting decided to meet, he met me in the center of Portland Oregon downtown he had accidentally leaked in his only pants just before meeting me, it was funny, great first impression.

    when i was in my teens i got my supply's by riding my bicycle to the drugstore and stuffing them in my backpack, since the last like 5 years i get them all online ordered to my doorstep, though for a part of that time living at home i had them ordered to a post mail box i purchased at a ups store., most the time im wearing teddy bambinos, once i move in with daddy and we have a washer and drier in the home ill be switching to cloth for most times, cheaper.




    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    I thought you sounded genuine; glad to know it's so.
    thank you, i came here for advice to apply to my true reality, if i tell a lie then i am only gonna get advice for a false reality, and that wont help.



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    I don't get true panic attacks but have known many who did; so I sympathize and honor the intensity of feelings about dying or running away. Not that those are actual options; I honor the feelings, the urge. I am disturbed by your frequent reference to having a choice between death and giving up the lifestyle, but I understand it; we obsessives tend to think in terms of extremes emotionally. Often we can not see a middle path, blinded as we are by light one side, and on the other, darkness visible. All the rest in shadow lies: we can not see to see.
    wise words indeed the middle path is the way to happiness and Enlightenment and i do have a very bad habit of seeing extremes, black and white, when this entire world is only shades of grey. polarization is only negative, it divides, we can only unite when we realize all of us are shades of grey and yet still in the same spectrum.




    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    I knew this gal in rl who spent months venturing outside only in the company of a therapist: walking down the block was very trying; public transit was right out.
    the extreme end, or close to it anyhow, i am grateful I'm not fighting something that strong. feel bad for your friend



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    Now, I am glad we are in adult baby and not in Greetings forum any more. You might want to make an intro post there describing all that good stuff about you that you could see telling to a mixed age audience. After all, while you have pressing issues and needs, and seem happy to get some guidance, there is more to you than your relationship with your daddy, and I hope much of the support you can use is by way of people just being friendly and talking over non-heavy stuff. Just being among folks who "get it" , who are tolerant and embracing toward alternate lifestyles. (furry, asexual, swingers, all sorts, celibate monks keeping vows of silence) is a big part of support, and at the end of the day outweighs the benefits of things like advice, counseling, and being told how many times you can retape a Kendall without the tapes losing all stickiness.
    lol, i see i see, ..... so how many times CAN you retape that kendall? :P
    really though i use white duct tape on most my diapers just for added security that the tapes dont pop off. and yes i get your point, finding a crowd i can relate to will make it easier to get in a crowd, i gotta be honest though, this isnt the first abdl forum ive gone to, the only other one i was on was DD dailydiapers, i signed up the week they started their forums years ago, and last year i finally couldn't take it anymore and left that site, it went downhill, i actually did not feel accepted there at all, i deleted everyone of my 800 posts i put on their forums one at a time.



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    I am heartened by your implicit recognition that sexuality is fluid, especially among such as we. On here are many whose sexual identity isn't cast in cement; just realizing that it needn't be set in stone means you are well on your way, to being able to tackle other issues; you seem to have a better than usual grasp of a large part of who you are.

    I know guys who like hetero-sex but masturbate to gay porn. There are girls too, who are happy with their rl hubby but like the look of yaoi. Again, all sorts of guys can have wives yet enjoy the company of other guys acting out a furry persona, whatever the sex of the fursuit. Sexual identities are simple for many but complicated for many others; "normal" doesn't equate to "healthy" and you can guess which I think is better.

    It comes as a surprise to many that they can be happily and faithfully married to a wife but "play" outside of the marriage. That different partners provide for different kinds of intimacy. And fidelity is an arrangement between people who get to determine just what fidelity means to them; if they are true to their agreement, and enter it with the terms made clear, as informed, consenting adults, let no man put this happy setup asunder!

    So yeah a married guy could see other guys on the side if his wife accepts this; I call this "thinking outside the box." *giggle giggle*
    lol

    yes im very open minded, accepting, and willing to try anything once and many things a few times if they don't hurt.




    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    Your daddy sounds cool; and very clearly he has already grappled with issues you are now facing; he should be able to help you through your own issues.
    yes he to is very open minded, accepting, and willing to try anything once or more.



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    I know it is part and parcel of being ab/dl to feel shameful as well as excited; I think I have an inkling what cross-dressers feel when they know that they are sporting ladies' undies secretly. But however your anxiety arises, it is spilling over into a generalized anxiety and sounds to me like a full-blown agoraphobia; diapers be damned. This is a problem that needs professional attention; online we can encourage and affirm and cheer from the sidelines, but -with your daddy's help - you must undertake responsibility to be able to cope away from the house, away from daddy, out in the world. Sounds like he would agree.
    yes he indeed would and does agree, and professional help probably is in my best interest, however i have no money for such nor health insurance of any kind, so its kinda outta the question, besides no man can be helped with anything if he cant first help himself, that said i know ive got it inside me to resolve any issue i dare, just need some nudgings here.



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    I am sure he'll help out. Good luck to you; good things are ahead. (Some of them in this thread.)

    Consider: some people have the opposite problem, they are exhibitionists and force the world to know what they are wearing by what's peeking out at the waistline or by smell. Some go to public loos and flush away their clothes to force themselves to be subject to public shame and ridicule.
    its a yearning for acceptance, i get that, but for them it turned into a desire/obsession not my boat but its one way their brain is forcing them to reach out for it, while i chose to hide from it.



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    I wonder: if between the two of you you could spring for a holiday, why not find an ab meetup (I heard of this happening in Vermont and Amsterdam) and go? Or a furry convention? (Some furs are babyfurs. A few are oldfur plus diaperfur, like me. And most fursuiters are diapered underneath. I suppose that it may make you feel more at ease knowing most of the people around you are padded. And by being out of state nobody would know you anyway. And your relationship is in its early stages: beginning with a holiday surely would get things off to a good start before getting into the domestic routine. A lot of the anxiety must be over other peoples' attitudes and thoughts; what if you KNEW they weren't judging you, or even were approving?
    we have been planning to try and do this too, an ab/dl camp or something of the like, just gonna be a year or so before we have the money and time, time being harder to get.



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    As to wearing diapers in public let me refer you to my own cubbie's article

    http://www.adisc.org/forum/content/1...rs-public.html

    He is a wealth of information on all kinds of things you have brought up, far more expert and experienced than I.
    a good article, thanks for the linking, i can definitely relate to those scenarios and thoughts/feelings.

  8. #8

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    I'll try to keep this a bit briefer.

    I am happy you two want a holiday together; I really do think an out of state meet with fellow diapered people might let you have less anxiety over being padded; I expect people will ask if you are and that would not only affirm that the public REALLY CAN'T TELL - but also it'll make it easier to say yes to them. They'll say "good for you" or "what kind?" and greet the news with interest and approval. It'll also help you to mix and mingle with people besides daddy.

    As to Kendalls? They retape 2 or 3 times until the tape is pressed and left; it bonds fast then.

    It's interesting daddy has a daughter and one ready to move out; him having custody (up til now) says more to me thn his also liking ladies. (For completeness' sake she should probably get formally emancipated, so she can sign leases, enter into other contracts, pay taxes, and relinquish child support; you don't need to speak to these things though; they are really between him and her. Just pass on the tip.

    I agree with you that it would be just too odd to live with him and her all under the same roof. For one thing he'll be treting you as under your rl age and her as being her proper age; for another it would be asking her to accept you, who are nearer her age, as sort of a step parent; even if not, and you are simply "daddy's friend" the close-in-age issue could muddy the waters. What if she brings home friends? No, you are right to keep living arrangements simple.


    yes he indeed would and does agree, and professional help probably is in my best interest, however i have no money for such nor health insurance of any kind, so its kinda outta the question, besides no man can be helped with anything if he cant first help himself, that said i know ive got it inside me to resolve any issue i dare, just need some nudgings here.
    Lots packed in here. I really would stress that although money is tight healthcare insurance isn't a luxury and aside from psychological issues, you should be protected from anything that may come your way; daddy loves you and it is pyour moral duty to look after yourself. He may have to get a job that will extend you spousal benefits; you may have to change state to get Romneycare or similar. I am continually appalled at Americans who have no poor or no hc;.

    As to not being able to be helped "if he can't first help himself" I am afraid that's pure hogwash. I am not ashamed to hire a lawyer, accountant, plumber or mechanic where I can't help myself, ditto for doctors. I see clearly you have high willpower, or at least quite intense feelings that can be channeled. One thing professionals do is offer solutions you may not have thought of, from hypnosis to acclimatization (especially for phobics) to strategies for committed couples to share. There are even surgical interventions for extreme ocd as well as various drug therapies.

    I am not a doctor or mental health professional but I can guarantee you the things you complain of aren't likely to improve by themselves.

    By the way I am a tad obsessive myself; fetishists tend to be. I am a bit famous for the "TLR" response. Sometimes there's a pent-up flood crying for release; many people come to Adisc and want to say everything on their mind. In my case I have an impression that my audience won't understand me unless I explain at length. It is hard for me to resist an urge to be very detailed; "completeness" is important to me - guess who MUST finish everything on a plate and who has a collection of Sunday crosswords saved because one word is unsolved. With the urging and encouragement of my friends on here I have tightened up my prose; you get more and better replies writing fewer words and spreading your points across more threads. I try to spend more time replying to others' threads as I do on my own issues.

    I am curious about the DD experience; and what led you to make many posts then remove them all (one by one.) I would not ask you to disparage DD as such or particular members there; but if you can say what that site lacked, where it disappointed you, why you decided it wouldn't suit your needs, stuff centered around you, I would be happy to hear. I have a small presence there but don't know the DD culture well, and would like to know more about it.

    You are not afraid to write a lot, and make many points, all of which merit replies; but aside from people ignoring long posts, many points deserve their own threads; and you make many points that can and should be commented on by more than just this raccoon! We have many members with insightful things to tell you; especially to do with shacking up with a daddy 20 years your senior with slightly different needs in bed. That is something I can't offer much help on, but I know for sure we have others who can.

    I wholly approve of the cloth and plastic pants route, and look forward to seeing your choices in that department and hearing your reviews. My fondness for them is exceeded only by my ignorance; poor raccoons are inclined to wear a pair until it falls apart and to buy retail... and as you know, retail offers very little selection.

  9. #9
    BecomingAbaby

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    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    I'll try to keep this a bit briefer.
    if you wish, imo i like the long detailed posts, leaves less to guessing and imagination.



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    I am happy you two want a holiday together; I really do think an out of state meet with fellow diapered people might let you have less anxiety over being padded; I expect people will ask if you are and that would not only affirm that the public REALLY CAN'T TELL - but also it'll make it easier to say yes to them. They'll say "good for you" or "what kind?" and greet the news with interest and approval. It'll also help you to mix and mingle with people besides daddy.
    we once went to a munch together here in our state, it was in dennys and consisted of like 20 middle aged men all wearing overalls with elmo and other sesame street characters on them, i had no idea they'd all be dressed that way the munch descriptions said dress normal. the second i saw them all panic attack grew intense, but i sat down and we ate and chat and i left after they did, in act i was fine and normal, but in mind i was freaking the hell out, the venue was just to public for their attire, camping i am happy to try cause it sounds like it will be a much less public venue.

    we never did that munch ever again,



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    As to Kendalls? They retape 2 or 3 times until the tape is pressed and left; it bonds fast then.
    duct tape is your friend



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    It's interesting daddy has a daughter and one ready to move out; him having custody (up til now) says more to me thn his also liking ladies. (For completeness' sake she should probably get formally emancipated, so she can sign leases, enter into other contracts, pay taxes, and relinquish child support; you don't need to speak to these things though; they are really between him and her. Just pass on the tip.
    yes when he was young he dated like i did for fear his peers wouldn't except him if he didn't, he doesn't really have much interest in females at all but his encounter with the now mother unintentionally led to the pregnancy, simply because of the pregnancy he married her and convinced himself he loved her, after the stories he's told me though its clear she did not love him and her rude crude and unacceptable behavior has actually left him with traces of PTS post traumatic stress, he often will hear someone say something and recall "she used to say those things and it meant..." sorta thing,

    she left him and didn't even care about surrendering custody, he's raised her since their separation from like 8 i think, and she never payed any child support at all. he counts himself as so extremely fortunate to have been able to raise her himself, he loves her so damn much i cant describe it, (as a good parent should)

    she will be 18 before moving out so im assuming the emancipation thing and all that aint necessary.



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    I agree with you that it would be just too odd to live with him and her all under the same roof. For one thing he'll be treting you as under your rl age and her as being her proper age; for another it would be asking her to accept you, who are nearer her age, as sort of a step parent; even if not, and you are simply "daddy's friend" the close-in-age issue could muddy the waters. What if she brings home friends? No, you are right to keep living arrangements simple.
    what he would do is tell her I'm just a friend and gonna help pay rent, nothing more, so everything else we would have to hide from her right under her nose, of course me being 247 diapered she'd figure that out before long, and if we weren't really careful she'd figure out the affection part to, at that point is when he says it wouldn't be a big deal cause she'd accept me cause she's very open minded and accepting, but regardless i agree with you its best to steer clear of that conflict all together, I'm happy to let them live their life as it is and when she's moved out i go in, i am about 8 years older than her, i suppose i should mention that every night i see my daddy we experience the greatest of stress when he has to leave to go home, we are just anxious as hell to live together but he doesnt push the issue, and i refuse outright until she has at her own pace moved out, she is pretty anxious though to go off and start her life so at least thats all well and fine.




    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    Lots packed in here. I really would stress that although money is tight healthcare insurance isn't a luxury and aside from psychological issues, you should be protected from anything that may come your way; daddy loves you and it is pyour moral duty to look after yourself. He may have to get a job that will extend you spousal benefits; you may have to change state to get Romneycare or similar. I am continually appalled at Americans who have no poor or no hc;.
    wheres the logic in that? if im on welfare healthcare then citizens pay for it out of their taxes, bad imo.

    however if i have no health care i will still get emergency treatment and the charge goes to 3rd part collectors who will chase me around and hound me, (which i dont give a f^$%) this way citizens do not pay for it out of taxes, good imo.

    i do not consider my credit score more important then burdening the public tax system, if other citizens taxes were paying for my healthcare morally i'd feel horrible and never go to the hospital,

    however knowing that my debts simply stack and pound against my credit i feel like the responsibility stays with me and does not get passed onto others.



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    As to not being able to be helped "if he can't first help himself" I am afraid that's pure hogwash. I am not ashamed to hire a lawyer, accountant, plumber or mechanic where I can't help myself, ditto for doctors. I see clearly you have high willpower, or at least quite intense feelings that can be channeled. One thing professionals do is offer solutions you may not have thought of, from hypnosis to acclimatization (especially for phobics) to strategies for committed couples to share. There are even surgical interventions for extreme ocd as well as various drug therapies.
    i ought to have included that when you seek out help you are still helping yourself, when you seek out advice that's you opening yourself up to be helped and the words slung at you make no difference until you yourself understand them and put them to action, as far as prescriptions go, sure that's something i cant get on my own but only because of the law :P besides, i hate drugs, especially any pharmaceutical, the power of the mind and soul far exceeds any material drug, im a meditation kinda guy.

    therapies/surgeries are also still things others are doing for you but only as you have allowed them to, or you feel they need to, still you helping yourself.

    but basically if it isn't something that the emergency room will do then it is something i will do on my own, i will not allow someone to take money from me in order to help me, doesn't feel right, id rather struggle ten times as hard to find the help on my own,

    what could be of most value to me are those solutions i may not have thought of, hopefully these can be given to me in words for me to act on, and words ought to be free and findable on the web and from friends and loved ones, otherwise ill be fine without them, any help other then that i will get out of the emergency room or just not at all.



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    I am not a doctor or mental health professional but I can guarantee you the things you complain of aren't likely to improve by themselves.
    maybe not likely. but it isn't impossible, nothing is impossible, your right about my willpower, I'd rather struggle for the near impossible rather then fork over lots of cash for the easy solution, i want to feel empowered that i have solved my own problems, i feel very let down to just take a drug and think that fixes it. it doesnt.




    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    By the way I am a tad obsessive myself; fetishists tend to be. I am a bit famous for the "TLR" response. Sometimes there's a pent-up flood crying for release; many people come to Adisc and want to say everything on their mind. In my case I have an impression that my audience won't understand me unless I explain at length. It is hard for me to resist an urge to be very detailed; "completeness" is important to me - guess who MUST finish everything on a plate and who has a collection of Sunday crosswords saved because one word is unsolved. With the urging and encouragement of my friends on here I have tightened up my prose; you get more and better replies writing fewer words and spreading your points across more threads. I try to spend more time replying to others' threads as I do on my own issues.
    i relate with you completely here. if i put to much food on my plate ill sit there for hours trying to shove it down, i actually stay away from crosswords and the like because i know ill never let them go once ive started them, until their done, i try very hard not to start anything i cant complete.

    here i would like to continue defining myself and my situation as much as possible, i know this thread has become nothing but wall of text, but thats ok with me, the help of those who will only read the small txts i will find in other threads and i dont mind repeated details in here, in smaller sentences in other threads too.



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    I am curious about the DD experience; and what led you to make many posts then remove them all (one by one.) I would not ask you to disparage DD as such or particular members there; but if you can say what that site lacked, where it disappointed you, why you decided it wouldn't suit your needs, stuff centered around you, I would be happy to hear. I have a small presence there but don't know the DD culture well, and would like to know more about it.
    basically it all comes down to the desire for incontinence, that forum is very adamantly against people with that desire, saying such people NEVER understand the ramifications, well i've been wearing 247 for 2 years now ive peed in front my boss at work ive changed in my friends bathrooms i GET the ramifications and they are just as i expected, and yet i STILL desire it, all this considered the people on those forums still refused to offer anything other then negative insults and criticism, never a supporting word, it really pissed me off so i left, also keep in mind, i never posted a thread about it, i kept it to myself, but when i would see someone else post a thread i was the lone poster attempting to offer support and i always got lambasted for it, i got insulted and torn asunder just because i tried to offer support to many someones who was having the same feelings as me, it was beyond ridiculous to see such a lack of support on those forums for people of my ilk, i finally declared it just wasn't the place for me,

    the topic of "i want to be incontinent" always pulls trolls out of the woodwork, and it always pulls the incontinent in who want to voice that they dont want to be, of course i get that, but what they dont get is there are many people who do want it, many people who have acquired it intentionally and many people who have spent years with it, with no regret,

    people assume if they dislike being incontinent so much then no one in the world will like it, and they should voice so, i clearly disagree, everyone is different, ill agree 99% of the population would absolutely despise being incontinent, but im sad to see they cant accept the 1% i feel i fit into,

    also make no mistake i do quite well understand alot of those "i want to be incontinent" threads are started by teens with raging desires who are not thinking clearly and in the end absolutely would regret it, of course this world is full of all these types and more.



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    You are not afraid to write a lot, and make many points,
    i think that's an understatement now ponder how much text was in those 800 posts i deleted i put alot of thought on there which i removed, so i actually went ahead and saved it all in a text document i still have,



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    all of which merit replies; but aside from people ignoring long posts, many points deserve their own threads; and you make many points that can and should be commented on by more than just this raccoon! We have many members with insightful things to tell you;
    indeed i will just have to find these threads with more specific topics and maybe repeat some of the things ive typed here to find that help, this is fine by me, i am actually very happy to have this one thread to fall back on full of all my details.



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    especially to do with shacking up with a daddy 20 years your senior with slightly different needs in bed. That is something I can't offer much help on, but I know for sure we have others who can.
    he's actually only 10 years older then me.



    Quote Originally Posted by Raccoon View Post
    I wholly approve of the cloth and plastic pants route, and look forward to seeing your choices in that department and hearing your reviews. My fondness for them is exceeded only by my ignorance; poor raccoons are inclined to wear a pair until it falls apart and to buy retail... and as you know, retail offers very little selection.
    well my daddy is very pushy that he wants to pull out a sewing machine and make them, im cautious to take that route cause i know he underestimates how hard itll be and im the one wearing them so any errors i am the one who'll feel it in the crotch,

    we compromised and decided once i move in we will purchase just enough cloth to last a week, and that'll give me a sturdy fall back option, then he is gonna start making them. hey maybe we'll be cloth sellers at some point in the distant future

  10. #10

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    Quote Originally Posted by BecomingAbaby View Post
    when i met daddy i was experimenting he absolutely loves babieing/diapering me as much as i do, but he also likes a bit of passionate.... butt sex, lol, was hard to outright type that, mostly cause im afraid its inappropriate but this is the 18 and over section i guess right?
    For the record, this site is purposely set up so that there is no "18+ only" area. While this is the "Adult" baby forum, that just means that the threads are more for problems adults will deal with (e.g. "Can a landlord evict me for wearing diapers?" vs. the TB question "How do I hide diapers from my parents?").

    I don't know how the mods take this, but where I was raised, sex is a fact of life. It happens. It's talked about, but usually tastefully. By 13, most people know that sex exists. You don't need to give the juicy details, but I don't think it's too "adult" to simply say something like "my boyfriend and I engage in anal sex on occasion".

    This is just me personally, but I also have a personal hate-on for all euphemisms about genitalia and sex that aren't used humorously. Guys have penises, girls have vaginas. That's just how things are, and euphemisms just make everything seem dirty and wrong.

    In other words, if you want to talk about things you deem "adult" in nature, try to do it tastefully.

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