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Thread: any advice?

  1. #1

    Default any advice?

    So, if you have read my other post, you know my fiancee knows about my liking diapers, but does not like the idea and does not let me wear anymore. The thing is she is really trying to understand this stuff. I guess what i want to know is how can i help her get more comfortable with all this. She has already looked at the site here a bit and has looked it up some. I dont want to force her to let me, because that might just drive her away. Overall I really am just not good at this sort of thing. Anyone have some advice?

  2. #2


    As far as her "letting" you wear or not, you have a choice to make:

    1) Suppress this side of you and be miserable - it does affect your overall demeanor, even if only in a subtle manner...
    2) Do your best to confine your indulgence to when she isn't around, which may be somewhat challenging, and could lead to further problems down the road.
    3) Lay it out as a compromise to her - you won't flaunt it in front of her as long as she doesn't get upset about the fact that you indulge privately.
    4) Pull the plug now, before you get married and have a whole other set of problems if this is an impasse the two of you cannot work around.

  3. #3


    I can honestly say that my (now) wife went through the same motions with me. When we were still dating in college, I revealed that I liked wearing diapers. It really freaked her out and she wanted me to stop. So, I least for what she knew. Eventually I knew it would come up again, and sure enough it did. At some point, before we tied the knot, I told her again that I was still wearing and even though she thought I had stopped, she didn't freak out nearly as much. Then, as time wore on, I slowly introduced other things: that I wanted to get some footed pajamas and a Care Bear. I was also careful to tell her that this was for me and that I wasn't asking her to get involved. We also went to a few counciling sessions and I think hearing an outside opinion, saying that this wasn't harmful, on the matter helped her. To be honest, if after hearing about it the first time didn't make her leave, she must care deeply for you. Hearing it again won't be nearly the shock. Just pick a time when it's just you and her, no distractions and let her know how emotionally important it is for you. My wife doesn't fully get why I'm an AB and she doesn't want to see me in a diaper, but I'm able to be myself for the most part and keep my diapers and footie pajamas. The bottom line is this part of you isn't going away. Better to be open about it, better for both of you. Best of luck!

  4. #4


    If she's trying to control what you do privately, there's a bit of problem there. She has to give you that freedom, and if it your diaper play doesn't involve her at all, there's really no reason for her not to. Your options are just as WBDaddy laid them out. You really should straighten this out before you get married.

  5. #5


    It's definitely something you should work out before getting married, if at all possible. I'm engaged too, and I remember asking the same questions in the beginning. The absolute LAST thing I was ever going to do was leave her over it, so I encourage you to be strong and try to work through it.

    Everything I say is gleaned from my own experience, so your mileage may vary, but I think it should be at least somewhat applicable.

    Suppressing it really is a bad idea, it'll make you bitter that she's holding such a repressive influence over you. In the beginning, just try to indulge in privacy. A conversation about it with her would be good, just don't try to force it and by all means, don't blow it up into a huge deal. Let her know it's something you like and are not willing to quit, but MAKE SURE she realizes it's not something that'll take over your relationship. The more relaxed you are during the conversation, the more likely she'll be to adopt that same, calm demeanor.

    I know it sucks, but be patient. I took me six years after telling her about it before she became comfortable with me wearing around her, and even now it's only once a month. I loss my composure once and grumpily wore diapers to bed despite her protests and that set me back immensely. I hope that at the least she can accept that it's something you do in your own spare time. It tided me over for several years and honestly, it's been enough for me in recent years.

    Onecho, how did the counseling sessions go overall? We're in a very happy relationship right now but sometimes I do wonder if it'd be good to have an outside opinion weigh in on the diaper thing.

  6. #6


    If you can't come to an agreement think of one thing that means the world to her and tell her she can't indulge in it. You should only change for someone if it's something YOU want to do. You should not change because someone else thinks you are not good enough the way you are.

  7. #7


    Quote Originally Posted by buckeye87 View Post
    It's definitely something you should work out before getting married, if at all possible. I'm engaged too, and I remember asking the same questions in the beginning. The absolute LAST thing I was ever going to do was leave her over it, so I encourage you to be strong and try to work through it.
    This would be why I put that last on the list.

  8. #8


    That's unfortunate dude... This is one of those things that you will need to sort out beforehand. You seem aware of that, so there is not need to beat that point home. If she is not comfortable being involved, see if there is a way you can schedule some private AB time. I would avoid being sneaky.... If you get caught one time she may be more angry at that than the actual act. Best of luck to you both.

  9. #9


    Honestly, this is a part of who you are, and if she can't learn to love you with this then she isn't the one for you. Just remember, the people that truly love you will learn to accept anything, given the time to understand of course.

  10. #10


    Heres an idea, that is if you both like to induldge in getting drunk.

    Stash a diaper in your bathroom for latter when you are ready to put it on.
    Proceed to have a great time with your mate, drink as much as you can safely do so and still keep your wits about yourself.
    When you belive you are both snockered up enough to try and make out, go put on the diaper and return to your make out session.

    If she is discusted by the diaper while hammered she will be just as discusted when you are sober.

    Now comes the part that take courage, if you firmly belive this is the one for you remove the diaper in front of her and toss it in the trash.
    If you are not 100% sure she is the one for you and have doubts she will ever let you wear a diaper after you tie the knot, wet the diaper in front of her. She will do one of two thing, make mad passionate love to you or leave in disgust.

    You will have your answer either way.

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