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Thread: Understanding...?

  1. #1

    Default Understanding...?

    I don't really know why I wanted to post this so badly... I guess I'm just currious if you guys feel the same way...

    I just wonder why I am this way? I mean it had to have started somewhere? I Don't know, its just hurts, hiding something like this from everyone... I feel like a phycopath, except they don't have emotions (that I know of) so they don't have to feel like this...

    How do you guys cope with the feelings that you will never belong? I went through a manic depression, and I never want to go there again... I also feel like when your paraphilia start controlling you, instead of the other way around, you loose a little peice of yourself.

    Please reply back. I really just need to hear someone understands what it feels like to be isolated by something they never chose, but can't controll.

  2. #2


    I'm sorry you're going through a rough patch right now. I can't say why you're a TB/DL I don't even know why I am an AB/DL I know it's tough being the only one you know with such interests. I remember the stress of hiding it and the thoughts that it was wrong. But I found there were others like me in the world and I eventually stopped fighting it. Remember you're not alone, and we are here to help.

  3. #3


    1: Psychopaths experience emotions, but usually vary between extremes, due to paranoia generally accompanying psychopathy.
    2: Sociopaths show no remorse for their actions, and thus no emotions.

    3: Depression is a common ailment for people your age, and generally talking to a licensed professional is a recommended avenue. If your depression is directly linked to you being a closet *B I highly suggest you talk to a professional, as I'm sure your parents would rather you want to be a *B than you attempting selfharm/suicide.

  4. #4


    I think most of us have gone through guilt and remorse when we were young. I know I did. I called it "my blackest deed" in a poem I wrote while in college. It is confusing, but remember it's not something you chose, but rather, it chose you. There is a recent thread running on why, and I've given three reasons I think are responsible. I hope that by finding this site and becoming engaged in the discussions here on adisc, you will feel better about yourself. Remember that wanting to wear diapers is only a small part of who you are. Concentrate on improving the good qualities that are you.

    The hardest part of being a DL is one's love life and finding a mate. We are compelled to wear diapers, yet we want someone else in which to share our life. Jewbacca is right in suggesting that if this is too much to deal with, seek professional help. In the big picture, most of us have found ways to have the diaper side of our life as well as a normal side. You will too.

  5. #5



    It would be nice to think that I could offer an easy answer - but I can't. You are evidently going through a lot at the moment - you are still finding your way in life, and you are aware that there is something far, far bigger than you but you don't know yet how you will fit into it.

    Finding the answers that fit you into your place will take time, and as Dogboy rightly says, being a *B/DL is only one part of who you are. Keep your eyes open to what is going on around you, because you may find that the answer comes at you from somewhere you haven't been looking for it.

    One other thought, which might or might not help. I'm much older than you, and I've had a lot of issues, and my wife is no different. But we take this as our belief: we get the hard stuff because we can handle it, while the many other people we see who don't get the hard stuff are spared because they couldn't. Stick at it: ADISC believes in you.



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