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Thread: AB/D: Ettiquite

  1. #1

    Default AB/D: Ettiquite

    AB/DL^ (Having issues typing tonight. v____v)

    Alright, due to a recent altercation with a member of this site I need to know, what can I say, or not say, to piss anyone off? I made the mistake, apparently, due to being extremely tired, of calling AB/DL a habit. I was then rudely told to apologize for something I didn't know was wrong. Anyway, someone give me guidelines.

    Also, I apologize if this is in the wrong place. It's not supposed to be a rant, though I should go rant in the rant forum but I have various journals to do that in, lol. I just seriously want to know if there are guidelines I need to follow.
    Last edited by Pandoras; 15-Feb-2011 at 09:21. Reason: Added stuff!

  2. #2


    I really don't think you should worry to much about this. As long as you are polite and respectful, most will never have a problem with what you say, even if you do happen to misspeak from time to time. As for apologizing for calling AB/DL-ism a habit, you have no need to. We(a bit of a generalization, but one I feel is accurate) know that you meant no offense. If anything you are owed an apology for the rude behavior of our 'anonymous friend'.

  3. #3


    So far, I have been polite and respectful. I did mean no offense. I appreciate you saying nice things and I even told him that I had met much nicer people on here than him, which I have. He made me feel like a child saying a swear word rather than the twenty-three year old woman I happen to be, lol.

  4. #4


    Being offended for calling AB/DL-ism a habit is a bit extreme. Maybe he/she was a bit tired too.

    As long as you don't have any rude intentions, you shouldn't have a problem on this forum.

  5. #5


    Insofar as AB/DL orientations or leanings being a habit, it/they certainly could. I'd need to see context, but the short of it is that there are disagreements here and people don't like to break out of their thinking modes.

    If they have become accustomed to "fetish," then they will stick with this label. "Habit" may well describe your use--though not all--just as "orientation" may fit for others, and perhaps "fetish," in its full and proper use, for other unfortunate folks.

    This, too, shall pass.
    Like so much gas out the ass.
    Last edited by h3g3l; 15-Feb-2011 at 12:15.

  6. #6


    It sounds like who ever it was is the one at fault, treating you like that. It should, at worst lead to a healthy argument about what ever, not being told you're wrong, and you should feel BAD!

    If who ever keeps giving you trouble don't be afraid to report them. We want our users to feel welcome.

  7. #7


    I'd also call it an overreaction. If we were to put up a poll asking what people consider this to them and gave "habit" as one of the possible responses, I'm sure we'd get some action there. Thing is, we can't decide for ourselves what this is because it's different for everyone. Clearly the person you were talking to does not consider it a habit but that doesn't mean it's bad and evil and wrong to refer to it that way. A simple correction would be sufficient.

  8. #8


    You know, I'm going to agree with everyone else here and say that it was an overreaction.

    It can be different for everybody! For you it may be a habit, for others it may be just a way to relax; and for some other people, it also may be a fetish. So long as you aren't generalizing the idea of it being a habit for every single instance, I don't think you did anything wrong. I mean, it'd be nice to see a log or some kind of context, but still, I don't see why the other person would react the way they did.


  9. #9


    ABDL is a habit. Anyone who gets offended by that statement is way too sensitive.

  10. #10

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