I've been doing a lot of thinking and due to a lot of emotional stress, regressing mildly but making sure that I am an adult when I have to be. I have learned a lot about myself in the past few years and recently with the fact that I buy toy cop cars, toy cars, et al, that I never grew up due to the autism I was diagnosed with in '04.
I also have incontinence issues which has forced me into diapers when I feel I will need them.
So I have realized that why grow up as an adult if you can control it. I have to be grown up at work, and when around certain people. I have worked hard to control a lot of it.
I work hard to maintain that balance between adulthood and my regressive child-like nature. I've been described by a close friend as a six-year-old that lives in the the grown-up world to the best of his abilities. It takes a lot of self-control in public to avoid acting like a child and I am proud of how I handle it.
At home, I'll think nothing of holding my blankie or cuddling with my stuffed killer whale, Dee Dee. As I type this I have my blankie with me. Or even of sucking my thumb which is a habit I never outgrew but have practice SEVERE self-control with because I don't want to be sucking my thumb in public.
So, my summary is why grow up if you can control your childlike natures when you have to. And I think with my situation- having my folks be in another state for five years, having to do a lot on my own, I've done well for that. This is my way of saying I've made peace with my AB side.
P.S. I think life is also what we all make it to be...