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Thread: Ever feel incredibly overwhelmed with your goals?

  1. #1

    Default Ever feel incredibly overwhelmed with your goals?

    Long story short, been gamer all my life, always wanted to learn how to make a video game. Which leads me to being a programmer in college at my 3rd year. Awesome?!

    Fuck no, I'm scared,overwhelmed and in general feel very under qualified and I just don't think I can do anything in the world of programming. Been applying to internships and I just don't feel like I'm going to get them. I was worried about making games or what ever so I decided to find a team of people that could help me learn and make a game with. As it stands I'm feeling very overwhelmed with what the lead programmer is asking of me. I feel like I just can't do it.

    Which in turn lowers me self esteem and confidence in my abilities. I learned a programming language in a day (Well I'm very familiar in it that's for sure) but it's not nearly enough...

    I'm engaged to be married.... and what I'm studying is something so competitive..... I feel like... I'll never be able to do anything productive with my degree.... I don't know I feel overwhelmed, I feel ... horrible. The more I learn the more there is to learn. The more I know the worse I feel and the less I know... it's some kind of vicious circle! WTF?!

    Honestly any words of encouragement? At this given time and moment I've never felt this low in my life about myself.... I couldn't even change my own God damn flat tire... -_- I feel utterly useless....

  2. #2

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    Two Quotes come to mind when reading your story, both by Teddy Roosevelt:

    "It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat."

    "Believe you can and you're halfway there."

    You have to believe in yourself. Don't listen to any critics who tell you that you can't do something (this includes yourself!). You will fail sometimes, it happens. There is no success without failure. The real test is how you respond to failure. So pick yourself up out out of the dirt, wipe yourself off, and kick this programmer college's butt!

  3. #3

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    I went through this when I studied to be a concert artist. You simply have to get out there and try. Anything you learn is never really wasted. You will have programming skills that could always be redirected. As for me, I played and concertized most of my life. I was never in the top tier, making records and performing with the big symphonies, but at least I was in the game. Now I want to be a published writer. If you don't try, you can never succeed. Just remember to keep you options open.

    I think that most people who start out in one specific field end up in another. My son in law started his company Nanosoft which produced Ispeak. Now he has many irons in many different fires, doing a number of things. Just keep your eyes and ears open for other opportunities. At the same time, don't be afraid to take other classes which might give you more diversity and opportunities.

  4. #4

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    Well, you know what I do when I feel like I just can't do something? Take a long-ass hot shower and sing whatever I can think of, usually in some pseudo-opera voice, of course.

    Life is about learning. Pretty much everything you do is about learning. And, sometimes, under-confidence is just what we need. It keeps us striving to always be better and to never stop trying to intake everything we can. Yes, confidence is good, and, yes, under-confidence and self-deprecation can be horrible things. But both sides of that coin are part of human nature, and if we don't look at ourselves and say 'Yes, I'm awesome, but I can be more awesome than that!', we'll never get anywhere in life. Heck, if we didn't wish to better ourselves, we'd pretty much either be catatonic or some kind of crazy I-won't-listen-to-anybody weirdo.

    I have utter confidence in you getting one of those internships. After all, everybody, and I mean everybody in any kind of business had to be accepted at one point. And I'm sure they felt he same way as you, putting unneeded weights on their self-esteem and telling themselves that they had no chance. And in such a haze of supposed worthlessness, they worked and worked towards doing everything they could to do better. And you know what happened then? They got even MORE awesome! And when the cycle began again (which it does for most anybody), they, once again, learned more and increased their awesome power.

    Just don't stop trying, and don't stop learning what you can. And if somebody tells you that you suck? You look that person in the eye and tell them:

    "Yes, but I'm getting better."

    That is what makes you worthy of your dreams; perseverance and the desire to always do more.

    I learned that from My Little Pony...

  5. #5

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    Quote Originally Posted by Shukkume View Post
    Well, you know what I do when I feel like I just can't do something? Take a long-ass hot shower and sing whatever I can think of, usually in some pseudo-opera voice, of course.

    Life is about learning. Pretty much everything you do is about learning. And, sometimes, under-confidence is just what we need. It keeps us striving to always be better and to never stop trying to intake everything we can. Yes, confidence is good, and, yes, under-confidence and self-deprecation can be horrible things. But both sides of that coin are part of human nature, and if we don't look at ourselves and say 'Yes, I'm awesome, but I can be more awesome than that!', we'll never get anywhere in life. Heck, if we didn't wish to better ourselves, we'd pretty much either be catatonic or some kind of crazy I-won't-listen-to-anybody weirdo.

    I have utter confidence in you getting one of those internships. After all, everybody, and I mean everybody in any kind of business had to be accepted at one point. And I'm sure they felt he same way as you, putting unneeded weights on their self-esteem and telling themselves that they had no chance. And in such a haze of supposed worthlessness, they worked and worked towards doing everything they could to do better. And you know what happened then? They got even MORE awesome! And when the cycle began again (which it does for most anybody), they, once again, learned more and increased their awesome power.

    Just don't stop trying, and don't stop learning what you can. And if somebody tells you that you suck? You look that person in the eye and tell them:

    "Yes, but I'm getting better."

    That is what makes you worthy of your dreams; perseverance and the desire to always do more.

    I learned that from My Little Pony...
    Thanks shukkume that really brightened my day and made me smile. Thanks you guys for your words of encouragement. I think Im just in over my head so I'll step away while keeping my dignity. Then I'll just work on a smaller project.

  6. #6

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    Shukkume is pretty much right on all the fronts, Dragsnick.

    Ambitions are difficult to follow-through with. Look at it like this -- if they weren't difficult, if they didn't aggravate us, make us scream, make us question our reliability, our ability, and our skill, the final result wouldn't be nearly so satisfying. We live in a competitive world where what separates the Dragsnick that typed that original post and the Dragsnick that feels a lot better about himself is the pushing, through whatever obstacles there may be, to get to the proverbial finish-line.

    You clearly care about yourself, your future, your family, and your career. That in itself should be an inspiration. What we desire to do can sometimes be so great and so overwhelming that it can stifle us. Don't let it -- just step back, take that shower Shukkume mentioned, or do something else that relaxes you. Then regroup and tackle the ambition you have with renewed inspiration and vigor.

    I've had this feeling in the past, Dragsnick. I have it now. You have it, and you may always will. But push and push hard against, and I can promise you, the successes you gain from those attempts will satisfy that fear. Good luck, bud! You can do this...

    ...and you'd better make games that blow me away.

  7. #7

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    It could be a really good thing that you're in a spot that's challenging you to do better. That said, you also need an environment the provides the guidance to help you grow and improve, and if you're in on something too big/wrong team then totally go find something better. Sounds like you're motivated and a quick learner. Even starting from scratch (as I did) that's all you need. Hang in there!

  8. #8

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    Sounds like you just need a little down time. Just remember to take some personal time to relax and don't let yourself stress too much. Make sure to schedule time to do things you really enjoy. I'm taking my last class finishing up my CS degree and have been through all the internship and job hunting interviews. The most important advise I can give in this field is practice, practice, practice. I've spent a lot of time programming in my free time by working on fun little projects and it helps sooo much (and looks good on the old resume too). Also, if you work with other coders you can pick up all sorts of interesting skills. Drop me a line if you have any questions or want to chat. I can tell you all about the different interview styles I've encountered (e.g. Microsoft, Amazon, VMWare, etc) and anything else you may want to know.

    Take care, buddy. *hugs*

  9. #9

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    the most important thing is to focus on the "now". because if you focus on the future too much, you will regret what you just missed presently

  10. #10

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    Most of this has been covered, but there is something I didn't see in my quick skim through: things worth doing are hard.

    If you're not challenged or don't feel at least somewhat overwhelmed, you're doing yourself a disservice. The challenge, you see, is to keep pushing, even if it's 10 lines of code a day. Even if it's -100 lines of code a day (as you can find tighter ways to do things with practice and experience).

    Footballers don't boot the ball from their goal-line and score; they kick it towards the goal, one nudge at a time.

    (And, yes, I myself know this but am petrified to do anything. It's a vicious cycle that you'll want to break while you're still pretty new to it.)

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