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Thread: Relationship

  1. #1

    Default Relationship

    I'm in a quandary. I've been married for around six years and I do not feel satisfied. I want to get out of my marriage, but in a way that is least damaging. I also have a daughter of two to think about. I've found a man that wants to take care of me and is turned on by me. (Don't worry, wife cheated on me first) I want to make sure that my boyfriend can come clean with his family about being gay and I need to make sure that my wife finds a job. I would appreciate pointers here. Should I stay or should I go?

  2. #2


    I don't see how this has anything to do with being an adult baby, at all. Not much I can help you out with.

  3. #3


    Well, seeing as this is such a weighty matter, I'm not sure anyone here would feel terribly qualified to tell you what you should do. Nevertheless, here's my 2 cents.

    --Write an intro I'm sure there's far more to Techorganna than just marital issues.
    --This should really be in Mature Topics.
    --If you don't mind my asking, do you identify as gay or bisexual? If you're gay, I can understand why things might not work out. But if you're bi, that's another matter.
    --Have you two seen a marriage counselor? You mention that both of you have cheated on each other (and no, the fact that she cheated on you first does not absolve you of your violation of your wedding vows, IMHO). I'm assuming there's a lot more to this than just "Oh, well, I found this cute guy who will baby me, so the hell with this marriage." I'm sure there are things and issues that you just haven't told us about. A good counselor should be able to mediate these issues better than any of us can.
    --If you really want my opinion on how to cause the least damage to your family: don't divorce. I don't think that being "unsatisfied" is a good reason to divorce, especially when there's a child involved. But I'm sure that there's more to it than that. If you could provide more info, that might help.
    --In the end, I'm really just speculating, and I'm afraid that's all any of us can do. You know the situation the best. You might not get the firm yea or nay you're looking for.

  4. #4


    Quote Originally Posted by Techorganna View Post
    Should I stay or should I go now? Come on and let me know, should I commit, or should I blow? This excerpt is from a song by the Clash.

    Under current circumstances where there are 'extra curricular activities' being practiced it might be prudent for all concerned to factor in regular STD checkups.

    Nobody can seriously tell you what you should try to do here. You need to start by looking to yourself to see what you really want. From there, a relationship takes a commitment by both parties to have any chance to work.

    If you are not happy in your marriage and it cannot be made to work, you should move on. Two people unhappily locked together are not going to provide a stable loving environment needed by a child. Between you, you will emotionally damage her. If you do decide to split from your wife and she is the primary carer of your daughter, you might try to understand that she does not need another job. Your wife’s job will be to see to the day to day needs of your daughter. Note, it was the female of your species that you got hitched to (and had a child with) not a beast of burden.

    Here I do not mean to cause upset, but need you to listen. I personally get the impression that you may be jumping from the frying pan into the fire. There are a myriad of issues that you and your boyfriend have not even contemplated let alone addressed. This relationship as stands is doomed to failure before it has a chance. There are people here more qualified to talk you through this than me. You would seriously need their advice on this matter.

    Regardless the outcome of decisions made, you and your wife need to sort out providing for the; 1) Moral, 2) Physical, 3) Religious, 4) Educational, 5) Emotional, Welfare of your child.

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