So I've been eating more before I go to bed at night, along with smoking less, and indulging in the delights of straight vaporized nicotine through an e-cig... Thus... LUCID DREAMS..
Now I'm not one much for regression. Albeit, it's fun, and inherently comes with the toddlerfur lifestyle package, but I've never necessarily fantasized about being physically regressed. It's just not one of my main interests. My age naturally fluctuates throughout RPs, pictures, stories, and whatnot, but one lucid dream I had the other night really stuck out to me as odd.
I have night terrors more often than not...
I was clinically diagnosed with O.E.S. when I was 15 (Over-excitability syndrome), which is supposedly a mental disorder very similar to bipolarism, except instead of intense mood swings, I just have intense moods, meaning that I get... overly excited, overly emotional, overly affecitonate. I think it's complete bullshit, but the doctor gave my dad a piece of paper saying that I have a mental disorder.
However, I'm starting to believe more. And I think that the lucid dreams are definitely caused by them. But I have night terrors more often than not when I do lucidly dream, which usually ends up with me waking up in a sleep paralysis... It's caused by something in my dream, my stupid overactive imagination jump-scaring me in my dream, and startling me awake when i'm not ready to wake up yet.
For those of you who don't know what lucid dreaming is, a lucid dream is a dream that is in vivid color, activates your senses (sight, touch, smell, taste, hearing) you are able to remember it well, and when you are experiencing one it becomes hard to decide what's real and what's the dream. Unfortunately, my family has a bad history of sleep disorders, thus when I do experience these dreams, my mind inevitably evokes something that scares or surprises me so badly, that I force myself to wake up. I don't really want to wake up, but the dream is so vivid, that I realize that it's a dream while I'm having it, and try to force myself awake, this forces me into a very strange state. When your body is asleep, it produces a chemical that practically paralyzes you so you don't thrash around in your sleep, sometimes you can wake up while still under sleep paralysis, and still be dreaming at the same time. This is what happened...
I went to sleep totally early, I had court that afternoon, and work afterward. I went to sleep, and had a pleasant dream about playing my concert... I knew that I was at high risk for lucid dreams that night, because I was remembering conversations I was having in the dream... I wasn't scared though. What scared me though was when I went back to sleep after I got up, and got a drink of milk... I went back to sleep.. then the lucid dreams began coming again. I was back at the concert... Walking around, and people were asking me for drugs. I kept on telling them "No, I don't have any drugs to give you, find your own damn drugs, ya hippies," I was walking through a big white house with a garden back yard. I'm guessing that's where the concert was happening, and I was setting up my equipment in the bottom of an empty pool. I was walking back into the house looking for food or something when I was suddenly cornered by somebody. I don't remember exactly who this person was, I didn't look at their face, but they made me feel strange, and I fell down.
That's when I woke up... half way though. I was laying in my bed, my eyes wide open, but I couldn't move a muscle. I was staring at the ceiling, and I could hear Hex breathing next to me (he snores, it's cute snores though, so I put up <3) I couldn't even say anything to help myself wake up, but I felt giggly instead of afraid. I felt like I fell down, and then I seriously felt like I was falling really really fast!
You know that feeling that you get when your foot falls asleep? I got that feeling, except ALL OVER MY BODY. The tingling sensation, and I couldn't move, it felt like I was falling off the face of the freaking Earth, and I couldn't say anything. All I could do is just lay there, and whoever it was that knocked me down was still talking to me, coaxing me younger and younger. They were pointing something at me. It wasn't a device of any sort, but something. Something silly probably.
Anyways, I lay there staring at the ceiling, and I literally felt like my body was growing smaller and smaller, and for some reason, I associate growing smaller physically with growing smaller mentally, so my thoughts drifted off to those of childhood playtime, and giggly happy feelings, but the irritating tingly sensation all over my body intensified.
I started losing my dream, and I could feel my body waking up along with my mind, I began curling my fingers and toes, and eventually just curled into a ball and enjoyed what was left of my physical regression dream...