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Thread: Your thoughts on Homophobes

  1. #1

    Default Your thoughts on Homophobes

    This isn't really me trying to start off a discussion, it's more me putting my thoughts down here and seeing if anyone else can relate to this.... Anyhoo..

    Now, in real life, I'm in the closet. Mainly for a few reasons. For one, I don't feel that me proclaiming I'm a lover of "teh penis" is something people need to use as a way if identifying me. Another reason is that all of my friends in real life are rather Homophobic. I usually have to play it straight around them, and in all honesty, I don't really care about it *that* much. I mean, it's not hard to do.

    However, I often wonder how they'd react if I eventually came out of the closet. Would they be accepting for my own sake, or would their homophobia kick in and would they look at me in a more hateful light? It often makes me think...

    So, erm.. yeah. The point of this little thing? Nothing really. Just wanted to write something before I scoot off to bed. :P

  2. #2


    Everyone will take it a different way, but if the person loves you, no matter what you do, they will always love you. My brother is gay and my mom and dad were mad at first and had a period where they didn't talk as much, maybe like a month. It didn't take long for them to start talking again because my parents love us so much that, sure they would get a little depressed, but they know there is no way around our faults and who we are, and they accept us even if it is hard for them. My mother still is a bit mad because of the whole children thing, but she has me and my two sisters. And now my brother is really really close with my mother, he tells her everything, even about his boy friend.

    If the people love you, they will accept you, if not, you find out quickly that they never really did love you as much as you loved them nd you are pretty much wasting your energy on trying to love those people and you can well be better off, but that is my take.

    Hope I helped.


  3. #3


    Homophobia is gay.

    But on a realistic note, I know homophobic people, and in a way, I can't blame themselves for this rather bad mindset.

    It's a natural instinct to have an aversion from anything radically different than oneself, and being gay is different from the norm.

    However, with the right education, people can realise that it's a stupid thing to hate anything different (race, religion, preferencees in bed, Fetishes[?])

    So, I don't blame homophobes in their way. I blame the/their lack of education/ineterest in learning about the other side of viewing things.

    (Do not get me wrong, I do not endorse homophobia, I'm just saying that this phenomenon is a case of 'Hate the wrong, not the wrong doer'')

    Also, generally, homophobes tend to be close minded people in other things to, so that's why I don't have many friends who are.

    And finnaly, fact : Every teenager-young adult has/had interest (romanticall) with the same sex at least once in his life. Some people become gay, but most straight. Anybody who says ''I have never felt attraction to the same sex, even for a very little amount of time in my life'' is possibly lying.
    (Prone to few exceptions, so if you haven't, or claim so, I do not blame you, reader)

  4. #4


    I understand your fear of homophobia completely. I've run into quite a few problems because of my sexuality which is why I am not out at work. However anywhere else I most definetely am because I am the kind of lesbian who just wants to hold her lovers hand walking down the street, cuddle, kiss and etc. I figure my friends and family are going to either find out one way or the other so I'd rather just tell them. A lot are shocked initially but mostly they deal with it pretty well.

  5. #5


    Homophobes have no or few education about homosexuality. My generation (just to make you feel old ^^) is more educated, i.e. we get conferences about homosexuality and homophobia so people can understand early that homosexuality isn't a bad, unhealthy thing, and that it's not a choice. Older people have less understanding about that and don't really understand why people are homosexuals, and they are most likely homophobes because their parents or tutors told them directly or indirectly that being gay is a bad thing.

    I could say that if you got out of the closet and your friends don't accept your homosexuality, they aren't real friends, but it's probably not even true. I blame it on the lack of education and their parents, and if they can't stand you because you're gay, it's because they were taught to avoid homosexuality in any form. I suggest you keep hiding it since it's rather easy for most people, and if you do anything gay, they'll just mock you and go on. They won't immediately assume that you're "one of them" (dom dom dom...).

    I want to say that homophobia is bad and should be punished, but the best people could do is educate the next generation. That's why we see less and less homophobes today. I doubt you can get your friends to attend conferences about homosexuality, it might be a little too late, but as long as you feel comfortable hiding it, just let it be.

    Quote Originally Posted by care_a_lot
    I understand your fear of homophobia completely. I've run into quite a few problems because of my sexuality which is why I am not out at work. However anywhere else I most definetely am because I am the kind of lesbian who just wants to hold her lovers hand walking down the street, cuddle, kiss and etc. I figure my friends and family are going to either find out one way or the other so I'd rather just tell them. A lot are shocked initially but mostly they deal with it pretty well.
    It's VERY different. Usually, people react more positively towards f/f homosexuality, because it's not like you can have the yucky anal sex or anything, and men are (usually) attracted by women, so they don't find it particularly bad. Women are, for the most part, more understanding, and they care less about either form of homosexuality, even though you'll occasionally find very close-minded girls, the kind that only think about their appearance and all that stuff. But m/m homosexuality is less accepted because if a heterosexual pictures two hairy men having anal sex on a bed, it's not a very attractive picture, but if a male heterosexual pictures two women in bed snuggling or whatever, they'll just find the women attractive without caring about the fact that they're gay. It's complicated to explain, but overall, females are more accepted than males in homosexuality.

  6. #6


    I find that most people whom are homophobic do not understand it, or are extremely averted to the idea of a (to quote) "Penis in their backside", I have a friend who is homophobic, he's an odd one, he doesn't even like the idea of lesbians unlike most homophobes. It's his belief, that we are supposed to have ONLY m/f relationships and nothing more, he's not religious either, of any kind. So perhaps the mindset lies more in our consideration of not who we are but how people believe we SHOULD be.

    I'm not gay but I've never been homophobic either, so I'd be lieing if I stated I could understand the mindset in any way at all.

    I can live with homophobes, they're entitled to dislike gay people if that's what really riles them, as long as they don't go out of their way to harm or hurt them mentally or physically.

  7. #7
    Footed P.J.


    Homophobes are inescapable. I am hetero. I am atheist (No god. No heaven. No reincarnation. No reunification with the dead once we are dead.). I get very angry at people that openly put down glbts. Especially so if they use the Bible, a holy book that I DO NOT READ, to justify their stance. I also get angry at those that bash on gays just because it's the coool thing to do. You're more of a jock, apparently, if you bash on gays.

    But, again, outspoken homophobes are inescapable.

  8. #8


    For someone who's rather *open* to homosexuality, I must honestly admit, I crack quite a few homophobic jokes.

    I think it has more to do with fitting in, rather than personal belief. In a group of people, even at my age, when I thought people would have finally gotten over all that school-yard sense of humour, I still hear quite a few homophobic comments or jokes. Of course, most of the people I know are straight, so it's no surprise really that such words are thrown around lightly. Growing up in a predominantly heterosexual environment doesn't really leave much room for being gay, and it's that ideal that gets imprinted onto a lot of people as they are growing up. Unwilling to depart from something they've believed in for so long, it's only seems natural to mock something that goes against their belief. And since we have a situation where the majority hold the same ideal, it's expected that you'll get quite a few of those who say it just simply to fit in.

  9. #9


    I don't like homophobes too much...Seeing as they usually just give a reason from the Bible...(woot Athiest too, PJ!)...But that doesn't mean I don't do jokes about them n__n...I've heard that a lot of gay's are fine with like jokes/impressions and even find them funny because either we aren't doing it right, or some other reason...And I say things are "gay" which (got and earful of this from Liz) she says doesn't mean stupid...But another definition of gay has become "stupid"...It's not an official one,'s on Urban Dictionary...So there must be other people who say it...

  10. #10


    My friends are pretty homophobic... I have one friend who my other friends sometimes joke that he might be bisexual, and one time people were discussing whether they'd fall out with him if he was gay.
    The answer was that they wouldn't, but they'd have to make sure that he didn't intend to rape them...

    I think the biggest worry of homophobes is having a guy find them attractive. I mean, these guys often see women as just potential sex partners, so they think that the gay guys are only interested in the sex...
    I'm not sure if I'm gay or bi or anything, but if I was I'd never tell my friends because they'd always be weary of me... I'd never be able to become close friends with any of them, because the second we started to get close I bet they'd worry about whether the closeness was romantic or not.

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