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Thread: Anxiety!

  1. #1

    Default Anxiety!

    Hey everybody! Just thought I'd come to this wonderful forum for a little support on an issue i'm currently dealing with..

    So here's the deal. I'm 19, a virgin, and have dealt with many anxieties throughout my troubled years of awkward adolescence. As we all know, growing up with a fetish can be confusing, and when combined with already non-existent self-esteem and social anxieties, can make for some downright miserable teenage years.

    Currently, my life seems pretty damn awesome..things have been getting steadily better. I'm in a relationship with my first real girlfriend, and she is super awesome and even totally accepting and willing to explore my fetish with me. (something which i havn't had the guts to do myself...despite STRONG urges for the last 5 years...i suck) I've started playing in a successful band, which has really helped with the self-esteem problems.

    However, there is still one slight problem that I need to address...and that problem has to do with sex. I have always been extraordinarily anxious to the thought of sex..this correlates with my diaper fetish. In retrospectively stupid self-hatred, I seem to had convinced myself at a point that i would be unable to ever enjoy and perform normal intercourse. Now, this isn't to say that I don't feel physical attraction..I'm able to "perform" solo to the thought of a woman with relative ease. The only problem is that when the time comes for me to have sex in real life, my heart starts racing, I become overly anxious, and I can't keep "it" hard. However, when my girlfriend and I are fooling around and I feel no pressure, "it" is always hard...Also, standard pornography has always frightened me. I never "get off" to it.

    I realize that i'm probably over analyzing things, and that I just need to relax...but it's difficult. I fully accept and love myself now, and am extremely excited to start exploring the diaper side of my sexuality, but I would like to get over this anxiety first and foremost. Would stopping masturbation until i get over this be a good idea?

    So now...does anybody have any input? Anybody been in a similar situation? I'm quite aware that once I'm over this problem it won't persist, but it's just annoying and I feel like I cannot express my love to my wonderful girlfriend...

    Well, thanks for reading my rant! I hope to talk to some of you about awesome things, and hopefully make some friends!

  2. #2


    I don't think you are alone in these feelings. We've had other members on this site who have expressed problems such as your. Some experience it far worse than you. I know when I was in high school, I had trouble going through with the whole deal with my girl friend. I think the nagging fear of getting her pregnant made it difficult for me to relax, and relaxing is very important. Once I got married and was trying to make babies, all of that anxiety went away.

    As for masturbation, I wouldn't that day or the night before. That way you have more physical impetus, so to speak. Use protection of some sort so the idea of pregnancy is gone. Sometimes having a healthy fantasy in your mind is a good thing as well. Everyone does it unless they are with their "dream partner" which seldom happens unless you are the "luckiest boy in the world", to quote South Park.

    It sounds like you are lucky to have someone who is so accepting. Be glad for her, relax, and let nature take its course. Try not to feel like you have to perform. Just enjoy the act, and if it happens, fine. If not, it will eventually.

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