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Thread: This is Why You Feel Miserable

  1. #1

    Default This is Why You Feel Miserable

    Every so often a gem surfaces out of the crap-infested sea of articles over at This article touches on real life friends, internet friends, texting, annoying people, mass media, criticism and being productive. It's a long read, but well worth it. I don't agree with all of it, but a lot of it makes sense to me.

    7 Reasons the 21st Century is Making You Miserable |

    You want to break out of that black tar pit of self-hatred? Brush the black hair out of your eyes, step away from the computer and buy a nice gift for someone you loathe. Send a card to your worst enemy. Make dinner for your mom and dad. Or just do something simple, with an tangible result. Go clean the leaves out of the gutter. Grow a damn plant.

    It ain't rocket science; you are a social animal and thus you are born with little happiness hormones that are released into your bloodstream when you see a physical benefit to your actions. Think about all those teenagers in their dark rooms, glued to their PC's, turning every life problem into ridiculous melodrama. Why do they make those cuts on their arms? It's because making the pain-and subsequent healing-tangible releases endorphins they don't get otherwise. It's pain, but at least it's real.

    That form of stress relief via mild discomfort used to be part of our daily lives, via our routine of hunting gazelles and gathering berries and climbing rocks and fighting bears. No more. This is why office jobs make so many of us miserable; we don't get any physical, tangible result from our work. But do construction out in the hot sun for two months, and for the rest of your life you can drive past a certain house and say, "Holy shit, I built that." Maybe that's why mass shootings are more common in offices than construction sites.

    It's the kind of physical, dirt-under-your-nails satisfaction that you can only get by turning off the computer, going outdoors and re-connecting with the real world. That feeling, that "I built that" or "I grew that" or "I fed that guy" or "I made these pants" feeling, can't be matched by anything the internet has to offer.

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  3. #3


    the part about cutting I really see as truth

  4. #4


    Wow. This article actually outlines some good points. Definitely makes for an interesting read whether or not you agree with it in its entirety. I'm actually very thankful for all the friends in my life that could be considered "annoying" or not.

    Thanks for sharing this article, and that video game one was interesting as well Point Blanch.

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  6. #6


    I'm kind of half and half on this one. On one hand, I do agree with a lot of what the article says...even though there's a lot of realness in online interaction, it's still not completely real, especially due to all of the little details mentioned on there. You've got so much control when you go online, and you can filter out all kinds of unpleasantness. And of course, it's so much easier to lie and hide things online.

    On the other hand...I don't think we're all hermits who never go out either. Most of us still deal with and do a lot of stuff mentioned in the article too, like dealing with irritating people and doing stuff for friends. In our case, though, as *B/DL's...we're at a huge disadvantage because very few people in our lives, if any, understand that side of us. So even if it's not "real" comfort that we get out of coming to places like adisc, it's still way better than what we get in "real" life.

    So a lot of good points were made, but I think there's a balance to all of it...a good mix that makes us happy. The key thing is that if you're not happy, then maybe part of the problem is being too far into the online world.

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    I love Cracked..I have them on an RSS feed! Occasionally they have some really funny and good articles which speak the truth.

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    Damn. This stuff actually makes sense. I am real addicted to facebook though but I have to break out of this habit. Goodbye ADISC!!!!! Psyche.

  9. #9


    I dunno...

    I can sort of agree with some points. With others...I'm not sure.

    The first point about annoyance. You don't have to go out to experience being annoyed by someone. In fact, I think the internet is a pretty annoying place. Probably more annoying than going outside on a random shopping trip, unless of course you go during peak shopping times. People tend to be a lot less polite on the internet because, most of the time, they don't have to fear reprisal since they are anonymous.

    I also disagree that you need tons of friends to be happy. Some people are social butterflies that like that sort of thing. Others tend to have a few really close friends and they are just fine with that. But this really isn't the point of the article and I'm nitpicking, so let's continue with a broader view.

    I've read a lot of articles recently that say that more or less, technology is the devil and today's younger generation is going to crash and burn because they are too dependent on it. Oversimplified and silly. Some of it may be true, but it isn't the end of the world. As time goes by, life changes. How we grew and/or grow up will be different than how our grandchildren grow up and so on and so forth. Changing isn't a bad thing. Some people seem to think it is.

    That being said, I do agree that people do need face to face connections and interactions. I've had bad days, weeks even. I'd shut myself up. It ended up making me worse. If I didn't go outside or see anyone, I'd just get more and more depressed. Going online to talk there can only do so much. Support online is good. Face to face support is 100x better. The physical, tangible aspect cannot be ignored.

    Having someone say you are being silly and telling you to stop moping online can be ignored, since there are idiots online all over the place and most people have learned to ignore them. Having someone you know IRL face to face telling you to wake up and see the light is harder to ignore. And if they are a good friend, they won't let you ignore it.

    Humans are social animals, yes. Going online serves to scratch only the base of the itch. The rest of it is left to fester and get more and more annoying unless you deal with it in the outside world. If you haven't learned to live in the real world, you will be in trouble. But only a small minority are that bad and they are the ones who would still be the quiet, shy kids that didn't talk to anyone in any era, computers or not.

    Technology and the online world aren't evil. They offer so many possibilities that didn't exist beforehand. They can be vastly useful and helpful. At the same time, you can't rely on them exclusively and ignore real life. That's unhealthy and dangerous. Abuse is the problem. Anything in moderation is ok. If you abuse something, anything can become dangerous, even water. The end-of-the-world hype prevalent in many types of media ignores that basic fact. It's not the thing itself, it's abuse of that thing that is the problem. "X causes cancer! Story at 11" Sure, if you eat 1,000 packets of X a day for the rest of your life. Moderation, people. That's the key.

    Anyway, the short of it is that I see the article's point and agree to some of it in theory. But basically, if you aren't a complete hermit/shut-in, you should be fine. Online relationships or buying your christmas presents on aren't going to ruin you.

  10. #10


    That article just made me feel even more depressed. This was a hard 4th of July weekend for us. Our one son and family are in Canada, other son is 2 hours away at his house nursing his dying dog, and our daughter and her family are also 2 hours away, having fun on the lake with their boat. My wife and I are limited because of her declining health. I meet lots of people in my work, and while together we have a good time, but then I go home and the house is quiet. I feel like my life is a ticking time bomb, where either my wife gets worse, and I do. This week end, I was definitely happy birthday bear.

    There was a time when people knew their neighbors. I used to know mine, but I've moved so many damn times, and then my neighbors moved. Like the article, I don't even want to know my new neighbors. I wouldn't have anything in common with them. I think life does this to you as you get older, so that when death comes you say, "Well shit, what took you so damn long?"

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