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Thread: New here and question?

  1. #1

    Exclamation New here and question?

    Hi I am bladder inco with overactive bladder sydrome which was diagnosed 4 yrs ago, although I have always had a weak bladder, also I am a bedwetter and have been for 15yrs but in the past 3 yrs I have not had a dry night, and I suppose I have got used to it, although I hated it all at first!!

    I had a bladder hydra distention about 2 yrs ago and something went very wrong to cut a long story short I ended up with an indwelling cath. For 6 months with many spells in A&E and also I could not use the flow valve due to exstreme pain, so my badder is now very small.

    I now have decided to live with it, having eventally had the cath. removed but it has left me with no control at all.

    The qestion I would like to ask other sufferes, I use a sheath cath, when I am at work and because I have excema I can not use it all the time so I am then dependant on disposable and washable garments (nappies and plastic pants), but I am very worried that i am starting to enjoy wearing a nappy!! Never thought I was a DL before but I really don't know anymore!!

    Is this normal !! I am a bit mixed up now, does any body else have these feelings?

    Thanks for taking the time to read my post


  2. #2

  3. #3


    Hi Soggyone,
    I personally use disposable diapers most of the time to help me deal/control my incontinence. From reading the incontinent area of this board and others, you will find that everyone handles this problem a little different. The main thing is find what works for you. Find what makes your quality of life one worth living again and doesn’t stop you.

    I personally feel that my diapers are my underwear now. Is it strange to like wearing diapers? I personally don't think so. The reason I feel this way is because now that I have to wear them, they are part of my every day clothing. Some people enjoy wearing boxers, or tighty whities, or bikini style underwear we just don't have that many choices now. For me it’s easier to change a wet diaper than it is wet pants. I have found that different diapers feel and fit differently and I personally want really good extended wear diapers most of the time.

    What is normal? That is a hard one. Depending on where someone lives, how they were raised and many other factors, normal doesn’t always mean the same. Normal food, clothing, underwear, and so many other things is different to all of us. I am not one to judge what is normal because I don’t know where the other person has been or gone through.

    Hope any of this has helped. Keep your head held high. There are a lot worse problems out there then not being able to control our pee.

  4. #4


    Quote Originally Posted by Soggyone View Post
    Is this normal !! I am a bit mixed up now, does any body else have these feelings?

    Statistically speaking, no it isn't normal.
    But it isn't bad either. It doesn't harm you or anyone and it isn't morally wrong either.

  5. #5


    Thankyou Valerye and Checkingoutail

    perhaps enjoy is the wrong word maybe more like freedom, comfort and security I get from nappy(I would rather wear Y fronts), and also having had some incredibly embarresing moments which still haunt me, so that's why I "enjoy" them because they allow me to live an normal life, and anything better than an indwelling catheter and constant UTIs, so perhaps I do like them because of past memories when I was ill, but does that make me a DL....still confused.
    No disrespect to DLs ment buy my ramblings


    but not down about it , can still laugh about myself which is the important thing

  6. #6


    Soggyone, I can understand your feelings completely. I have decided to stop constantly fighting with trying to get my incontinence "fixed" and now manage it as part of my daily routine. For many years, doctors thought I might 'outgrow' the problem as I neared adulthood. I didn't. Then it suddenly became a massive push of drugs and, when those didn't work, they wanted to do surgery, "just to see what's going on".

    I stopped it all. I'm happy in a diaper because I can live my life. I'm not a shut-in. I'm working, enjoying life, and not getting infections. So I enjoy my diapers in that sense--they give me the freedom to have my life back instead of being bedridden, sick, or unable to go out.

    At the same time, I decided several years ago that I would also enjoy my diapers as much as I could. If I had to have it as part of my life forever, then it might as well be something I could have fun with, rather than be something I always looked at with loathing. I found myself being a DL and later an AB and realizing I enjoyed it. It turned out that part of me was missing that early affection and I later found out why. Having someone fill in as a mommy now helps bridge that gap.

    Is this normal? What is defined as normal anymore? Is the couple who gets into bed and takes turn tying each other to the bedposts for fun and sexual turn-on normal? I'm not into it, but some people are. So we each have our own little things and we continue to move through life. It remains private, it hurts nobody else, and is fun for us. It seems to me like it is hard to define this as wrong unless you want to bring religion into the discussion.

  7. #7

    Smile Thank you for your honesty

    May be I am at the stage you were analogRTO some time ago, but I still wake up in the morning soaking wet and then get fed up with it particualy peeling every think off!! But I have tried bed bags at night and I hate them, and usauly wake up with it on the pellow next to me!!, as I said before I use a leg bag at work, diapers would not be practable because of the work I do, but the rest of the time I use nappies which I get from my local health authority which fine, but not good enough for night time use hence why I use washabe nappies At night.
    There's another problem I have is what to use when I am away, as yet I have not found a disposable nappy that does not leak at night as I lie on my side.

    Thank you all for your honesty, that's what's so good about this site.
    And analogRTO how did your partner feel? I admire your bravery, maybe I could learn a lesson from you..


  8. #8


    There's another problem I have is what to use when I am away, as yet I have not found a disposable nappy that does not leak at night as I lie on my side.
    If you can stand the initial cost, cloth diapers & vinyl pants are much better for night time use, mainly because the padding wraps around the side and catches leaks there. Another option is Molicare super-plus with a doubler pad. Bulky, but not uncomfortable. Again, kind of expensive but much more leak-resistant than any other type of disposable that I'm aware of.

  9. #9


    Soggyone, finding a decent diaper can be tough. I know I used many store brands for years and was happy with their performance until they cut quality just so they could get more of the market share. Anymore, I buy premium diapers online from any of a number of retailers. Buying the premium diapers actually prevents leaks, and contrary to what most people might think, you end up using less diapers overall and spending less money.

    My wife has no issues with me wearing a diaper to bed--I have worn them since we first met. She appreciates that I will wear a diaper and not ruin the mattress or leave her to wake up in a puddle of urine. Most nights if she comes to bed and I am already asleep or going to sleep and I am not already diapered she will remind me to put one on. She also helps diaper me on a regular basis, and has no issues with going out and buying the diapers for me if needed.

  10. #10


    it's possible to come to like diapers after wearing them for medical reasons or for what ever reason.
    many people feel mre secure in them knowing their protected.
    I wouldn't get stressed out over it, theirs other things worse in life then liking diapers.

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