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Thread: How Can We Bring The */DL Community to the Awareness of Society (or Should we Try?)

  1. #1

    Default How Can We Bring The */DL Community to the Awareness of Society (or Should we Try?)

    I am posing a question that has been asked before because I am interested to know your thoughts about how we as a community could possibly attempt to make being */DL more socially acceptable or at least bring the */DL community to the awareness of society. Gay people have had a lot of success doing this, why can't we? My questions are: how do we go about raising the awareness of our community without doing harm? What are the risks involved? And are there people willing to take these risks? I can honestly say that I'd be willing to take risks if I weren't alone in the endeavor.


  2. #2


    I don't think we should, there will always be prejudiced people in the world (still are plenty in regard to homosexuality) and no amount of a PR campaign is going to change that.

    As I see it there are a few fundamental differences between being gay and being *BDL:

    1. Life expectation used to be (and still is to an extent) to grow up, marry someone of the opposite gender and have children. Having a quirk such as this doesn't affect that cycle, but being gay obviously means that that path is not the right one for you, and probably needs explaining as people may ask questions.

    2. The proportion of people who are gay is much much higher than those who are *BDL, this means there is far more reason to educate the general population about people that are gay, and that there is nothing wrong with it, as most people will know several others who are gay.

    What benefits are brought by raising awareness in society, none really. If you need to tell a partner or a relative then you do so on an individual basis, and in a manner they are likely to understand, there's no need for anyone else to know.

    Finally, think of the children, don't we want to let them keep some sort of innocence? We teach them about homosexuality because it is prevalent and we don't want a divided and prejudiced society. If we feel the need to tell everyone about our quirks then what next, do you want to go around proclaiming rubber fetishes, toilet play, enemas and all the other diverse range of things some people enjoy. Everybody has quirks, that makes people interesting, isn't it better just to tell those who you need to and have them hopefully understand.
    I think if you try and raise awareness you'll just end up increasing negative publicity and spreading further the damaging rumours to do with paedophilia etc.

  3. #3


    I understand. it would be foolish to reveal to everyone all things that are best kept private. But for those of us who have been compelled beyond our power to resist engaging in this kind of behavior, isn't there a way that the public could be informed in a responsible way that would foster understanding rather than disdain?

  4. #4


    For me, I would ask what is the benefit? Sure, it would make the explaining of the fetish to someone else marginally easier, given that they know the background information about it. You still have to explain your personal connection to the fetish, which is the hard part of 'coming out' conversation to begin with.

    Also keep in mind, the LGBT community has a real strong reason to have community wide discussions in terms of acceptance. People get harassed, abused, or murdered because of their sexual/gender orientation; not so with *B/DL's.

  5. #5


    Society can find us if it wants. Forcing weird stuff you do in people's faces is asinine and inconsiderate.

  6. #6


    Quote Originally Posted by Moose View Post
    isn't there a way that the public could be informed in a responsible way that would foster understanding rather than disdain?
    Well not really, no matter how hard you try there will be some members of society who will always animosity to groups like ours whether you like it or not, you cannot change everyone.

    And what would be the benefit? The public don't care and the majority don't know we exist as we are a HUGE minority of the public. I mean besides an episode of CSI or Jerry Springer they will never have heard of us before or since and so there is no reason to "come out".

    Besides I doubt anything would change, they'll hear what they want to hear. Or a psychologist will explain it to the public using the information gathered from those who sought help (which will be those who took this side of them to the extreme) and give them a lot of false information. Frankly we can avoid a lot of hassle by just keeping our mouths closed about this except to our SO and maybe close friends.

    As I have stated repeatedly, the public don't need to know so they shouldn't have to be told just because we want acceptance/acknowledgement.

  7. #7


    Quote Originally Posted by 0x000017 View Post
    Society can find us if it wants. Forcing weird stuff you do in people's faces is asinine and inconsiderate.
    I'm going to have to agree with that. There are more homosexual people that there are AB/DL/TBs. Not to mention, homosexuality isn't a fetish, it's a sexuality; hence the name homosexuality.

    People don't usually try to raise awareness about their fetishes. That's usually reserved for diseases and such.

    Even if we were to bring our interests to the attention of the general public, do you really think it would do any good? What possible benefits would we receive? I think that people would just be too stubborn and resistant to it.

    Now, if you're thinking about how people once mainly thought that way about homosexuality, you're right. But if you're thinking it could be the same was with *B/DLism, you might also be right. However, look at how many centuries it took for homosexuality to be accepted. Less than half of the general public accepts it still. Look back at bible times. People were still shunned for being gay.

    Sure, we could could try and start a revolution to raise the acceptance of *B/DLism, but I doubt it would be the same. Like I said, homosexuality affects more people. It's a lifestyle, not a fetish.

    Now some of you may be arguing that *B/DLism is also a lifestyle, and you're right to an extent. However, most people consider it to be more of a fetish.

    People usually like to keep their fetishes to themselves.

  8. #8


    I think the only thing we really should do is not give the society a wrong message. Making sure that if people find out about infantilism (which does happen a lot) that they won't get the wrong information, and makes them think we are some kind of pedo freaks.

  9. #9


    What would be the biggest benefit of bring awareness about TB/AB/DL? more "acceptance" but then even if its well known, it won't be well accepted by everyone. Further there is maybe a handful of people in one's life that need/could be okay to let know. I guess I'm just wondering what would be the point of the effort and possible ridicule, shame, etc. to make it more "well known?"

  10. #10


    Until there are a group of rogue diaper wearers that save people from burning buildings and/or Superman forgoes the red underwear for some Abenas, there won't be any public turn around. Almost everyone here wishes there would be a bigger separation between us and the fringe/pedo groups that we're nearly always sided with, but it won't happen anytime soon. People of power and strong influence groups are always coming out in support for gays and lesbians and Hollywood elite have "vanilla" kinks like 'confessing' to BDSM or even those bestiality stories (once a drunk night with... types). Unless there is a very strange upswing in public opinion, you will never hear "Local hero and diaper lover/connoisseur was shopping at their local drug store when they foiled a robbery in progress." Also, aside from the cute high school/college dare pics of teens and 20 somethings in depends, that won't prevail as commonplace as well.

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