Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 20

Thread: What should I do?

  1. #1

    Default What should I do?

    We had a family party last Sat. with lots of young grandchildren around (3 of them in diapers). We used one of our extra bedrooms as the "offical" changing room, therefore all the diaper bags were in the room. When most of the people were out in the back yard with the BBQ, I went into the house just as my 6 y/o grandson was coming out of the changing bedroom. I was to far away and he moved to fast for me to see what he was doing, but I thought it strange that he was in the baby changing room. I came around the corner as he went into the bathroom.

    Out of curiosity I went and stood by the bathroom door. I heard sounds that were not in accordance with just using the bathroom, and he stayed in there for over 10 minutes. Our daughter (his mother) came in the back door of the house and saw me, and asked me if I had seen her son (the one in the bathroom). I pointed to the bathroom and she came and knocked on the door asking him if he was ok. He gave a somewhat feeble and hurried answer that he was. Then she said, we need you and everyone is waiting for you. We both heard some moving around, with my daughter even looking at me with the look of wondering what he was doing, then he unlocked the door and came out (not having flushed the toilet). His mother asked him what he was doing in there and he said "just going to the bathroom". She asked him if he forgot to flush and he ran back in and flushed the toilet (his mother was in to much of a hurry to question him more, so they just went back outside)

    Well after they left, I went into the bathroom because I had a bad feeling about all of this. I looked around, saw the rug had been moved alittle bit, and then looked in the trash can. Sure enough, there was a disposable diaper with some toilet paper on top of it. I pull it out and the tapes had not been used, but it was very wet. My heart sank.

    Don't get me wrong, I love my diapers, but if I had to do it all over again, I sometimes wish I wouldn't of gotten into them in the first place. To be honest, they have been almost more of a liability then an asset through the years. With all of the fear that my kids would find out, and if they did, what embarrassment that would cause. And if other friends would find out, what they would think of me. And just the general feeling that even though my wife accepts them, does she down deep think I am less of a man because of wearing diapers every night. And having to buy disposables for our vacation at the end of this week because my wife doesn't trust me without a nighttime diaper now. And what if her relatives find them while we are at their home the next two weeks, she would die a thousand deaths!

    So when I saw the evidence of my beautiful grandson, who I taught how to ride a 2 wheel bike at 3.5 years old, and am teaching him how to play the piano, possibly going down the same road I have, it cause pain in my heart.

    I don't know what to do about my "find". Should I tell my daughter about it, or just let her find out about it herself? I know my grandson would be very hurt if he knew I told on him. But what if he steals a diaper out of another diaper bag such as at church and gets caught? Not only will he be embarrassed, but the whole family would be also. Since his sister is out of diapers (his mother is 7 months along with his brother), the only way he will get diapers is by stealing them. So getting caught is a real possibility.

    Or should I try and talk to him myself in private? If I could tell him by personal experience what he is getting into, it would probably cure him. But I am not about to tell him about my diapers, he really looks up to me and I would never do that in a thousand years!! I told my wife about it and she doesn't have any ideas either.

    So do any of you have wisdom about what I should do in this situation?

  2. #2


    Golly, Grandpa, here on ADISC we have discussed When Kids Love Diapers often. I posted on that topic this week. You might want to use the site search function for WKLD.

    The thing is since you taught that lad to ride a bike, you have a bond of trust with him. Right now it is vital that you keep communications with him open.

    Also try to avoid projection your interest in diapers onto him.

    Maybe the lad was just curious and is not a confirmed infantilist yet. However, you have circumstantial evidence he did steal the diaper from the changing room. Clearly a way must be found to discourage his stealing.

    Suppose he is already a dedicated infantilist? Thousands of productive responsible adults are infantilists. This is hardly the end of the world for the boy or your family. Still, the lad needs to be taught how to act-out his infantilism discreetly, being circumspect and using common sense.

    Perhaps after doing some of your own research into WKLD you can have a frank chat with your daughter and the lad's father about ways to deal with all this. Remember, if the boy is an infantilist that will not go away. Deny him diapers and he will only get more desperate and reckless obtaining them using any means necessary.

    Many pragmatic parents and relatives find the best approach is to provide diapers for such a young infantilist, then work out an arrangement in which the child earns those diapers. Diapers do cost real money so it is only fair the person who wears diapers for fun is the one who pays in some way.

  3. #3


    Some weird situation.

    I think it would be a great idea to approach your daughter, and tell her his situation (still hiding your interest for diapers). Tell her you did some research, and found out a number of possibilities for this behaviour (including infantilism).

    Also, tell her that it is best not to confront him in a baf manner- use gentleness to do so.

  4. #4


    I'm no child psychologist but I'd bet a lot of kids have varying degrees of interest in infantile stuff at times (like a great many other things). They're curious little creatures and I don't think it necessarily says anything about him as a future ABDL. If it really is a problem, his parents will suss it out sooner or later since a six-year-old isn't particularly good at hiding things. The only thing I would expect would make it more likely for this desire to stick is to make this event significant. In other words: nothing to see here, move along.

  5. #5


    Why not sit down and talk to the kid?

    Not like "Oh, I like them too", but say you found the diaper in the bathroom after he left. He's six years old, if it was REALLY him he probably won't be able to lie convincingly. You are his grandfather and he looks up to you. You already understand where he may be coming from, but he thinks you are this perfect person and you "understanding" would probably just be expected from you by him. He won't suspect you feel the same way and he'll have a confidante if anything else serious happens later in his life. I see this as a chance to create an EXTREMELY strong bond with him. If it turns out he IS into this stuff you could just be an understanding person to talk to when he has problems. I'm sure a lot of members here wished they had someone like that growing up.

    I probably wouldn't tell his parents about it without talking to him. Explain that stealing is WRONG, under ANY circumstances. Tell him you may be able to help him explain to his parents what it is, but leave that decision to him. If he wants to tell his parents and just wants to have an adult who can rationally explain it to his parents it would probably help a lot. He may not want his parents to know at all, and as long as he agrees to not do anything illegal, I think that is completely fair. How would YOU feel if someone outed you?

  6. #6

    Default Thank you, Angela

    I remember my mother being very understanding when I first wanted diapers, maybe too much so. Because I know that her letting me be diapered by my babysitter, and her diapering me, made them become a huge part of my life. But I was younger when this happened then my grandson is. Maybe if she would of just talked to me about them without the diapering, it would of been enough at that time, who knows? So how should I or my daughter or her husband appoach him without making diapers more of a "thing" in his life if he isn't really into them that deeply? If it is just a curiosity yet, would it be wise to let him be diapered by his mother for a time if he asks for that? Would that "push him over the edge". If he is already an infantilist, then how far should we let him participate and what boundaries do you think we should set at his age of 6?

    I know you could probably write a book on the questions I have asked, so I can understand if you don't have the time for these questions.

    Thank you for you caring about this situation anyway.

  7. #7


    You said your sister was 7 months into a pregnancy, or did I read wrong? It could be a bit of a regression thing that young children seem to go through when there's a big change going on in their lives- such as a sibling on the way. It's possible, but so is anything. It could just be a curiosity the child has, maybe seeing a family member in them and getting attention that he doesn't get anymore?

    Seeing as how diapers for most of us are either a sexual thing, or a stress relieving thing, it wouldn't make sense for a young child who has neither of those to have an interest in diapers outside of a waving curiosity. Just sit and wait, imo, and let him know vaguely that you're there for him to talk to if he has something he needs to tell someone. That's the best thing I can offer tbh.

  8. #8


    I have to agree with Trevor and Sila. A lot of children go through this when there is a younger sibling and outgrow it. If he is/becomes an infantilist, there is nothing that can change these feelings. What then become paramount is that he accept himself and not be made to feel ashamed like I was.

    This is a parental problem, so I would let them handle it if discovered.

  9. #9


    Let the kid off the hook this time. It's probably a one-time thing. Diaper theft is usually not a precursor to a life of crime I would imagine. Let the mother deal with the issue if it ever becomes a real problem. Its probably better for the kid that attention is not drawn to the act. The less they are thinking about diapers the better.

    What insight would you have to share with the mother? Just as many of us in this community have grown up under permissive or hardliner or clueless parents; I don't think any correlation is apparent between how we as a whole were raised and the development of this fetish.

    I don't think you should talk to your daughter about infantilism. If you had instead caught her 6 year old forcefully tying up another 6 year old, it wouldn't be an appropriate time to bring up your BDSM fetish with your daughter for the same reasons: it's not accurate or appropriate to ascribe any sort of sexual feelings to the 6 year old, and also your daughter likely just doesn't want to hear about it, especially from her kinky father.

  10. #10


    Talk to your grandson before doing anything else, he may just have been curious as most kids are. He is only six and so this may not be set in stone and may outgrow it, or this may have just been a one time event.
    Talking to his mum/your daughter isn't a good idea at the moment as you don't have all the facts yet and may cause more trouble than it's worth as you may get him into trouble but also lose your bond with him. If you confront him avoid talking about you and focus on him, just try to find out why he took one and tried it, if he says he didn't like it then drop it and move on. But just reassure him that you won't betray his trust, he may confused about why he did it as well.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  • - the Adult Baby / Diaper Lover / Incontinence Support Community. is designed to be viewed in Firefox, with a resolution of at least 1280 x 1024.