Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 17

Thread: Religious Education and the Retreat

  1. #1

    Unhappy Religious Education and the Retreat

    So I have lost my faith in Christianity. I need to tell my parents before the weekend because that's when the retreat is, and I can't lie the whole retreat praying and pledging myself to something I no longer believe in. How do I tell them?

  2. #2


    Be straight up about it. Tell them you've lost your faith and have no desire to go to this retreat. I don't think it's really a good idea to come up with some elaborate excuse why you shouldn't go. I don't know if your folks are super religious, but if they are, stand by to catch a lot of crap. My advice then: stand up for what you (don't) believe in.

  3. #3


    I say you should just be honest with them and tell them that you've done some thinking and you've come to the conclusion that Christianity is not for you. Tell them that this retreat doesn't mean anything to you on a religious level and going to it would just make you miserable. And, like dcviper said, if your parents are fanatically religious then they will give you a lot of shit over this. If this happens, don't let them push you into believing something you don't. If being a Christian is not for you then don't let your parents force you into it. On the other hand, if your parents aren't all that religious then they'll probably be a little disappointed but they will most likely accept your decision.

    Good luck, I hope things work out for you.

  4. #4


    You pose a very interesting question. Many of us here are atheists or agnostic, and a few of us gave up our faith, so we should be able to help you out. Your parents will understandably be very angry, and since you're 16, you may still be forced to be faithful or act like it. I think your best option would be to be very straightforward and give an explanation for it, so it's not just a "That's stupid, I'm not going to believe anymore," explanation. I think it would be best to just straight out tell them you don't believe because of (insert reason). Yes, they will be angry and probably not give you a choice, but it's your life, not theirs.

  5. #5


    Just be honest. If the coming out doesn't go too well, remind then that, by there own doctrine, lying is a sin and that "trying to believe" would just make you lie to others and yourself.

    In any case, good luck. I'd like to be able to give better advices, but this is not an ordeal that I had to endure (my parents are not exactly religious, so they really didn't care either way). Just try to re-enforce that you are just being honest whit them and yourself.

  6. #6


    Tread lightly, you're in dangerous territory here. To many parents telling them you don't wish to follow their religion anymore is a giant hot issue.
    First I just want to say it is certainly honourable you do not want to go to the retreat if you don't feel apart of it and feel as if you would be lying.
    On the other hand if you tell your parents you may possibly be forced to go in attempts to reestablish your faith. Do you think your parents may do that? It's ultimately your choice, but weigh the options of temporarily sacrificing personal integrity and possibly having the hammer come down with your parents and the retreat in attempt to bring you back into the faith.

    A big factor here is how religious are your parents? Are they every once in a while Christians, Sunday Christians, practising Christians, or devout fundamentalist Christian. What sect is your church, is it a more liberal or conservative congregation? Are they happy and loving, or fire and brimstone?
    How do you think your parents are going to react? Will it be anger, sadness, acceptance, etc.?

  7. #7


    Why are there two threads about this? This one and this one: ??

  8. #8


    Feel free to pm if you want to talk privately...but being a christian my self even of the liberal variety I feel compelled to ask what has happened that has caused you to not believe any longer...belief is a strange thing...its deeply personal so ill understand if you don't feel up to discussing it...I have found its easy to feel disenfrabchised and dissilusioned because conservatives dominate the faith and its hard to be different and a christian when so many other christians are telling you being you is wrong "and imcompatable with christian teachings" I have found that there is a difference between beleiving in the christian trinity what ever that means to you me and any one else and man made and added on to: I.e todays church I no longer make the assumption that people stop beleiving due to others in the faith because through talking to others its become clear some just look at it and either don't see the point anymore or "the facts" don't add up any longer...going off topic here so one last thing faith isn't based off fact faith is beleiving what doesn't seem possible and beleiving sometimes with out fact and its what your heart tells u to what is your heart telling u? If u no longer believe than tell your parents get it over with and then be prepared to defend it...I want to say your parents should understand faith or no faith are both deeply personal descions regardless of age its not your parents descion...

  9. #9


    I lost my faith a while ago, but it's started to come back for me. Which is always nice as I'm usually "that depressed guy who sits in the corner"

  10. #10


    I'll take the devil's advocate position and say go.

    1. You may still learn something useful. Most religions teach values that are intrinsically good even if you don't believe in the magical parts. You go visit Aunt Edna even though you can't stand your cousins, don't you?

    2. Good practice for when you get older. Out in the real world, you'll spend lots of time admiring the Emperor's new wardrobe and going to business seminars or training sessions where you learn and pledge loyalty to the latest and greatest management system. Kaizen, Six Sigma, employee empowerment. Been there, done 'em all. All boils down to Hawthorne Effect. Doesn't matter if its b.s., you still have to do it.

    No point upsetting the parental units over something like this. Let them have their fantasy for another year or two. UNLESS, there's a big entry fee for this that they haven't paid yet. I would then consider the moral obligation to save them some cash on something you don't want anyway.

    Is it possible that this is something they think you really want, but don't care that much about themselves?

Similar Threads

  1. Is Marriage Still A Religious Event?
    By Dream in forum Mature Topics
    Replies: 35
    Last Post: 28-Jul-2009, 21:00
  2. The Religious/Political Debate Thread.
    By Boogeyman in forum Mature Topics
    Replies: 38
    Last Post: 19-Jan-2009, 02:34
  3. Replies: 10
    Last Post: 23-Mar-2008, 09:50
  4. The return of SEX!!! (Education)
    By BabyMullet in forum Off-topic
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 30-Jan-2008, 16:38

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  • - the Adult Baby / Diaper Lover / Incontinence Support Community. is designed to be viewed in Firefox, with a resolution of at least 1280 x 1024.