Who here has experienced them before? How often do you have them?
Here's why I'm bringing this up:
I'm taking an abnormal psych class in college this semester. Today, in the lecture we were digging into the Dissociative Disorders (i.e. Dissociative Amnesia and DID/Multiple Personality). I flipped through the chapter and noticed something called Depersonalization Disorder. I know, it's so common to flip through a book with diagnoses and say "I think have that!" but it's sooooo true in my case. I really believe I have this. It's actually a big relief to see it mentioned there.
In Depersonalization Disorder, people have chronic 'out-of-body' experiences that will cause problems in daily functioning. People with this disorder tend to be slightly disconnected from reality. While they may pass a reality test, it's like they are watching themselves from outside their body, wondering if they are really in control and really doing what they are doing. A person with this may also have derealization, in which the environment around them seems hazy and indistinct, foggy almost.
That is the world I have been living in since the sixth grade. I can actually recall the day when I was out on the basketball court, and suddenly my whole world seemed to change. My vision became hazy, my body felt hollow, and it appeared as though all the kids around me were acting nonsensically, like they were robots or something, without any purposeful meaning or actions.
It was the weirdest thing, but it never went away! I'm still in this out of body experience. Ever since then, I feel as though my life has been one big dream, like someday I was going to wake up to realize I've been in a coma and merely imagined the last ten years. Every once in a while, it seems like things might get better, like I might 'snap back into things,' but it just doesn't happen, at least not for long. It's as though I'm watching my own actions from someplace else.
A lot of people have these moments at times in their lives, especially in times of extreme stress, sleep deprivation and sensory deprivation, but for some people it just keeps going. I'm trying to get into seeing a therapist soon, and will definitely be bringing this up. I have sensory processing issues that I am aware of, have been diagnosed with, and am treating, and they seem to explain a lot of the symptoms of depersonalization, but not all of them.
Any thoughts? Suggestions? Anyone else think this might fit them?