You could very well be completely lost right now. If you weren't around yesterday afternoon then you most likely missed it. The basic gist is I screwed up. I'm still pretty disappointed and most of all embarrassed in myself for what I let things to escalate to. It has been mentally torturing me all night at work if it makes you feel any better. Trust me, I've felt like shit for the past 24 hours now.
Back story - I logged on to one of my favorite freelance tshirt artist sites yesterday. A site I been following for quite some time. Many artists I have nothing but respect for there. I never expected to go into the forum section and see that the hot topic of the afternoon was furries. What was being said, I won't repeat. Pure hatred was fueling in that thread. Normally I wouldn't care if it was a bunch of strangers but to have it come out of the mouths of people I admire for the talent they possess. It really got to me. I couldn't let it go either. I just had to step in. What a fool I was though. Yes I battled with some clear logic and refrained from petty name calling but it still did no good in the end. At one point I actually thought I had won over the discussion but some select few still couldn't let it go. And then it happened, they resorted to some heavy net digging and came up with my biggest darkest secret. This. They found me on here. Hatred for furs turned into hatred for diaper freaks and insisted I must be some kind of pedo too.
I just stared at the screen, not believing this shit was actually happening. Please someone tell me this is just a dream. A panic state took over me and I started going on a delete spree of any kind of connection to me I didn't want to track me down.
I know internet forums are full of people with nothing better to do but seek entertainment in the ridicule of others. I get that. What I wasn't prepared for was to have that happen by people I actually know. I lost a lot of friends yesterday, easily a all time record for me. Yes I know I'm better off without them if that's how they feel but it still hurts.
This post isn't all bad though. I have come away from this with some knowledge. What knowledge is that you ask? Trust can only go so far. I was a fool to think something like this would never turn around and bite me in the ass one day. I've taken much needed precautions now though. I created two new emails that each serve their own separate purpose and protect me at the same time. I also locked down my livejournal and every single post from my past. The ironic thing is in a way I should be thanking these haters because they made me aware of the lack of discretion I have in my life.
To the mods who had to deal with me yesterday. I am sorry. To the furs who might of seen the post. I am sorry. To myself. What's done is done. As much it bugs the living hell out of you that you can't turn back time, accept it. We all mistakes. Chill.