Page 1 of 4 1234 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 33

Thread: School Reputation and Popularity

  1. #1

    Default School Reputation and Popularity

    In my situation, I am only 3 months from graduating high school, a long sight away from the first day of first grade in which I joined the community of kids that I am graduating with. When I was in first grade, I could easily say that my Aspergers' was in full bloom by then and I had made to what I call many mistakes that would cost me a horrible time making friends. With the stereotype of having connections with the popular kids of school, I was always in the pursuit of becoming popular, and yet I was the kid that was ridiculed for being weird and for being "gay". This left me in really hard times, and in reflecting 12 years later, this has let me realize how much my thoughts on this have changed. Nowadays, I am a very social person and embrace myself for who I am. I don't care about the popular kids nowadays because they are the drug addicted asses that make too many stupid decisions in their lives. I do have friends, and I really enjoy my time in school now, comfortably waiting for prom and to graduate in June. Now this may sound like my rant on my success story, but what really strikes me now is the change of how I think of the whole concept of school reputation and the popularity food chain. I think it is complete nonsense due to it being completely irrelevant to what my personality and my life is.

    I am probably done from talking about myself, but now I ask, whether you are in school or have long graduated from it, how would you describe your popularity situation in school. Also, how do you feel about popularity in schools.

  2. #2
    Butterfly Mage

    Default

    When I was in school, I was bullied mercilessly because of a fairly severe speech impediment (which, oddly enough, vanished in my early 20s). My psycho dad actually thought it was cool that I got bullied and told me to shut up and not speak anytime he had friends over since he didn't like people knowing he had a defective son. (He did quite a bit of bullying to me at home too.)

    In high school, I pretty much didn't talk to anyone. I worked part time in a pharmacy and bought a motorcycle. I also started dressing all in black. I also stopped wearing my glasses while on school property. The bike, black attire, and silence was enough to make the bullying stop but I didn't have any friends. I have never looked back at my public education experience.

  3. #3

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by tk7432 View Post
    In my situation, I am only 3 months from graduating high school, a long sight away from the first day of first grade in which I joined the community of kids that I am graduating with. When I was in first grade, I could easily say that my Aspergers' was in full bloom by then and I had made to what I call many mistakes that would cost me a horrible time making friends. With the stereotype of having connections with the popular kids of school, I was always in the pursuit of becoming popular, and yet I was the kid that was ridiculed for being weird and for being "gay". This left me in really hard times, and in reflecting 12 years later, this has let me realize how much my thoughts on this have changed. Nowadays, I am a very social person and embrace myself for who I am. I don't care about the popular kids nowadays because they are the drug addicted asses that make too many stupid decisions in their lives. I do have friends, and I really enjoy my time in school now, comfortably waiting for prom and to graduate in June. Now this may sound like my rant on my success story, but what really strikes me now is the change of how I think of the whole concept of school reputation and the popularity food chain. I think it is complete nonsense due to it being completely irrelevant to what my personality and my life is.

    I am probably done from talking about myself, but now I ask, whether you are in school or have long graduated from it, how would you describe your popularity situation in school. Also, how do you feel about popularity in schools.
    Are you taking a miracle medicine for you aspergers? You are very articulate about some very "normal" teenage concepts. Having grown up in a family with more Aspergers than so called normals, I am very impressed. My youngest brother is 16 and he is still so obsessed with his own interest that he doesn't seem to notice the bullies. He still can't manage irony or sarcasm and he still has the explosive break downs when someone disturbs his routine.

    Man if I could get my brother to understand normal social concepts like the one you are talking about if would be able to handle the day to day problems that most of us can deal without confusion and sometimes a breakdown.

    AS to your original question. I was in a click made of the redneck, pick up truck, back woods crowd. So popular with in my own but made fun of by most. Ultimately, I don't know many of them anymore so FUCK EM

  4. #4

    Default

    A High school reputation is worth about nil when you get out into the real world wherein you find all your more-popular-than-you friends are grads struggling to look for jobs because they did mickey mouse degrees whereas you took a couple of years out before going to uni to get a proper start and are doing a chem degree with decent employability potential

  5. #5

    Default

    I don't think "popularity" in high school has anything to do with how successful one becomes one way or another....and that means good or bad.

    The way I see it is...like in elementary school, a lot of kids in high school are mean, and a number of the more popular ones bully those that are not, and it is a "popularity food chain". A lot of people that fit into the *B/DL community by nature end up being in the less popular group. So it's natural for them to be bitter towards the popular ones and look for every angle to gain an upper hand on them by saying "Well, yeah, they were popular in high school, but that doesn't mean anything and I bet they're struggling now."

    And sure, a lot of them probably are. But a lot of them probably are not. Because in high school, people are still teenagers...most people still have a lot of growing up to do. I'm willing to bet a number of people that were popular in high school that are mean grow out of it, look back on it and feel stupid and bad about it. Some of them probably never do.


    So the key thing is what tk7432 is...the whole thing is irrelevant to your personality and what your life is...meaning you shouldn't let it get you down. To a lot of people, it is hurtful, whether they want to admit it or not. Like a lot of things in life, the important part is not to let it bother or get you down...you have to ignore all of the people who just try to make you miserable for no good reason, because they're not worth your time. But even though it's a natural response to make yourself feel better, keep in mind that it's probably not accurate to say "Well, now I'm the successful one and all of them are suffering horribly...ha ha!"

    Basically, I always say take people for who they are, not the mistakes they've made in the past, because some people change and some people don't.

  6. #6

    Default

    I never cared to fit in in my teens. I tried in my pre teens and failed. Then when I was 14 I decided screw it and be myself. But lot of kids knew me when I was in high school and even the middle school kids knew me but I still didn't have lot of friends. I found them to be boring so I kept to myself. We didn't have things in common. I was highly into video games then. I did try and get kids to come over when I was 16 but none of them did so I gave up again.

    It sounds like you did better than I did in high school. Sure I talked to the freshman in my Spanish class but they were friends of my brothers. I am sure they knew I had AS because my brothers have mouths so I'm sure they told them. They would invite me to their conversations and they talk to me. Also when my brothers have them over, they invite me to be with them and I stay for a little bit and go back to my own thing.

    I would describe myself as popular since everyone seemed to know me and I was anti social and chose to be because I didn't try and fit in. I didn't want friends because I had given up on them and I found my peers to be boring. I also had an aid in every class and when I was 17, I started to be in classes on my own because it was their way of having me grow up and learn to be on my own and be more independent and she only be in certain classes with me. I used to have meltdowns in class so my aid bring me back to the resource room when I have one of my episodes. I was never bullied but kids would try and take advantage of me by trying to get me to do things. Kids also didn't want me joining in their conversations and they get mad at me and always wanted me to be quiet. When I would try and care about them, they tell me to mind my own business so I learned they wanted me to ignore them. Then they accuse me of not caring about them. In my senior year, the rumor floated that I was a lesbian. Also kids would ask me for my opinions on someone and they would go to that person tell him or her what I said about them. Then I would get accused of being rude. I quit answering their questions when they ask for my opinions and if mine were negative, I refuse to tell them. I don't understand why they did that. Plus kids used to get mad at me for asking too many questions because I couldn't understand what the teacher was saying and they also thought I didn't listen.

    But I would say my senior year was the best because I was treated right and they were the freshmen in my Spanish. They didn't give me a hard time and I think they understood me and accepted me. They liked hearing me imitate the Teletubbies voices and saying lines from movies. I also had a job at the folkshop and in the high school library but it wasn't even close to part time but it was some money I got.

    I also did sports in high school, softball and track. Softball when I was 15 and 16 and track when I was 17 and 18. I was unfairly cut from the team when I was 17 because I saw how kids made the team and I had better skills than they did so it was obvious I was cut for being a sped. It was a new coach we had that year. Even few other girls agreed I was unfairly uncut and my parents felt the same. One of them didn't even want to play for the team because of it so she quit. At least I had some support. One of my online friends thought I shall tell him 'fuck you" to his face but I told her that wouldn't solve anything because he can use that as a reason why he cut me from the team. But because I liked track better, I never bothered confronting him about it. So I did it again next year and didn't bother with softball even though it was the same coach they had again.

    Do you have AS too childishdaze?

    That's awful Butterfly Mage you had a horrible father.

  7. #7
    Butterfly Mage

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by teddy564339 View Post
    I don't think "popularity" in high school has anything to do with how successful one becomes one way or another....and that means good or bad.
    Actually, one of my most awesome interrogations was of a big, dumb, arrogant football jock from my high school. Despite being arrested and in custody pending trial, all this ignoramus could talk about was his "glory days" on the high school football team. He didn't remember me, of course. Ha ha. But it was hard to keep a straight face reading his criminal history. See, in the real world, it's illegal to beat people up on a regular basis. But he never figured out that football credentials doesn't make one above the law once high school is finished.

    So... he had over two dozen arrests for Assault-II and a bunch of other penny-ante charges for disorderly conduct and disturbing the peace. The pinnacle of his post-graduate career was as a box mover in a warehouse (not an actual forklift operator, mind you, but just a guy that moves boxes.)

    This guy was a real loser. Being popular in high school -- plus $1.25 -- will get you a cup of coffee once high school is over.

  8. #8

    Default

    I was in the middle group at school. I was friendly with the popular kids and the geeks and the moshers, and then somewhere in the middle I had my own core group of friends. I was the one that was always organising outings with everyone I knew, trying to get the groups to come together. Dress-up trips to the cinema, bowling, new hobbies, I did the lot, and with a massive variety of people.

    It meant that I never really got *that* close to people in my year, aside from maybe 6 or 7 really close friends, only maybe 3 of which I'm still in contact with now, three years after leaving school. But it did mean I was always doing something, and always had people to chat to. I know these people well enough that if I was in an emergency I'd be able to stay at theirs, and if we meet at parties then great!

    I don't regret a thing about high school! A lot of people were worried about me, and even got quite nasty at one point, when I decided to leave school a year early and take a gap year before going back to my studies, saying I was wasting my life, but at the end of the day I'm at uni now, and I'm doing ok

    I've got friends in my block of accomodation, friends on my course and friends (my bestest ever friends) where I work.

  9. #9

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Butterfly Mage View Post
    Actually, one of my most awesome interrogations was of a big, dumb, arrogant football jock from my high school. Despite being arrested and in custody pending trial, all this ignoramus could talk about was his "glory days" on the high school football team. He didn't remember me, of course. Ha ha. But it was hard to keep a straight face reading his criminal history. See, in the real world, it's illegal to beat people up on a regular basis. But he never figured out that football credentials doesn't make one above the law once high school is finished.

    So... he had over two dozen arrests for Assault-II and a bunch of other penny-ante charges for disorderly conduct and disturbing the peace. The pinnacle of his post-graduate career was as a box mover in a warehouse (not an actual forklift operator, mind you, but just a guy that moves boxes.)

    This guy was a real loser. Being popular in high school -- plus $1.25 -- will get you a cup of coffee once high school is over.

    Interesting as this story is, it does nothing to invalidate what I was saying...which was that being popular in high school in itself has nothing to do with one's success in life. Sure, some people who are popular in high school go on to do nothing with their lives and break the law or whatever. Guess what? So do a lot of people who aren't popular at all.

    The same is true in the other direction...no matter what your social status in high school is, you can still end up being successful.


    My point is...where someone goes in life has a lot more to do with who they are as an individual than where they fell in the social realm when they were in high school. That's all I was saying. This guy you mentioned sounds like a jackass. Yeah, maybe him playing football in high school accentuated his propensity to be a jackass, but playing football doesn't make someone a jackass.

  10. #10
    Asher

    Default

    I'm pretty much known as "the nice guy" at school (whether you consider that popular or not is up to you; I personally don't). I know a lot of people (and vice versa), but I wouldn't say that I was friends with all of them (more like "acquaintances"). I only have a handful of true blue friends that I trust; to me, that's more important than anything.

    But as for this whole popularity discussion, its time for a good ole' definition:

    popular |ˈpäpyələr|
    adjective
    1 liked, admired, or enjoyed by many people or by a particular person or group : she was one of the most popular girls in the school | these cheeses are very popular in Europe.

    With a definition like that, the question arises: what "is" popularity? Sure, it means that you are liked (or, for a better word, "known") by a lot of people, but is that really the case? Do people really admire that particular person/group? I think a lot of people that call themselves "popular" create that allusion for themselves (they begin to think "their shit doesn't stink), but they have to learn that in the real world, its not about popularity or how many parties you went to or how many people know you. Everyone has their own little groups of friends, and as long as you have that, then who cares about popularity? Its friends that will help you get places, not your popularity.

Similar Threads

  1. Perception of School when you first started school
    By EvaIlyxtra in forum Mature Topics
    Replies: 19
    Last Post: 18-Jan-2010, 16:59
  2. Reputation
    By Mesmerale in forum Mature Topics
    Replies: 71
    Last Post: 03-Apr-2009, 00:23

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
ADISC.org - the Adult Baby / Diaper Lover / Incontinence Support Community.
ADISC.org is designed to be viewed in Firefox, with a resolution of at least 1280 x 1024.