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Thread: Goodbye thread

  1. #1

    Default Goodbye thread

    I've read several goodbye threads lately. I nearly posted this in one but thought it better not to mix this with someones salutations as an issue of respect to them and the people responding.

    Am I the only one who finds departure messages strange.

    I've never felt compelled to leave one.

    Lets face it, if I get killed by a car while directing traffic at work tonight and never log back on here it will simply be a passing curiosity to those who even notice I'm gone.


    I don't know, maybe it is a generational thing, but even though I form a connection to folks online I still do not have the emotional connection to them that I do friends I've made physical contact with.

    Of course it could also be that my concept of friendship is so personally binding that I feel the same way about coworkers and casual acquaintances. I have an open and caring disposition that leads many people to think of me as a dear friend while the people I consider friends and feel that I can count on no matter what is a significantly shorter list.

  2. #2

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    Quote Originally Posted by khaymen View Post
    Lets face it, if I get killed by a car while directing traffic at work tonight and never log back on here it will simply be a passing curiosity to those who even notice I'm gone.
    With most of the well known people on the forum (I didn't use regulars because well, the group is a bit smaller then all regulars), yes I do believe we'd find out some way. Most people have made good friends and those will usually find out some way or an other. I know that if something happens to me you all will most likely find out.

  3. #3

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    Quote Originally Posted by Martin View Post
    With most of the well known people on the forum (I didn't use regulars because well, the group is a bit smaller then all regulars), yes I do believe we'd find out some way. Most people have made good friends and those will usually find out some way or an other. I know that if something happens to me you all will most likely find out.
    Who are you? :P

    If I were to leave I'd probably just tell the people that I think would care. I wouldn't post it on here, unless I was FORCED to leave, like my parents were going to block the site or something, because that might get people to be more aware of the dangers of smoking... I mean of getting caught. Most of the threads DO seem like a cry for attention, but that just makes me feel bad for those people.

  4. #4

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    I don't want to sound like a dick, but I tend to think that goodbyes are self serving more than anything. I think maybe people do it for closure on an issue, almost like once they have said bye they have no obligation or expectation on them to return.

    I think it also helps people trying not to come back to stay away. By saying goodbye, everyone is expecting you to go, And will likely question you if you return.

  5. #5
    Butterfly Mage

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    Quote Originally Posted by MyLastWords View Post
    I don't want to sound like a dick, but I tend to think that goodbyes are self serving more than anything. I think maybe people do it for closure on an issue, almost like once they have said bye they have no obligation or expectation on them to return.

    I think it also helps people trying not to come back to stay away. By saying goodbye, everyone is expecting you to go, And will likely question you if you return.

    My opinion of most "goodbye" threads is that the author is really saying "please, please, PLEASE beg me to stay! You'll really miss me if I'm not here". The overwhelming majority of the time, the folks writing these threads are either newbies or people with single-digit rep. In other words, most of the "goodbyes" come from people who are so new that we never knew them anyway.

  6. #6

    Default

    I could've sworn we had a rule against making goodbye threads and, oh look, so we do:



    Quote Originally Posted by https://www.adisc.org/forum/announcements-news/697-rules.html
    No "I'm Leaving!" threads.

  7. #7
    Butterfly Mage

    Default

    Since when do the rules stop people from engaging in self-serving, histrionic behavior?

  8. #8

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by khaymen View Post
    I've read several goodbye threads lately. I nearly posted this in one but thought it better not to mix this with someones salutations as an issue of respect to them and the people responding.

    Am I the only one who finds departure messages strange.

    I've never felt compelled to leave one.

    Lets face it, if I get killed by a car while directing traffic at work tonight and never log back on here it will simply be a passing curiosity to those who even notice I'm gone.


    I don't know, maybe it is a generational thing, but even though I form a connection to folks online I still do not have the emotional connection to them that I do friends I've made physical contact with.

    Of course it could also be that my concept of friendship is so personally binding that I feel the same way about coworkers and casual acquaintances. I have an open and caring disposition that leads many people to think of me as a dear friend while the people I consider friends and feel that I can count on no matter what is a significantly shorter list.
    There are several reasons behind departure messages on public forums:
    1. Self-serving or ego stroking (mentioned in another reply);
    2. Informative;
    3. Reflective;
    4. Closure.


    This is why, when I was certain that I'd not be around for a while, if ever, I created a private blog entry about it.

    90% of the people on the board know me, for instance, as "that guy with the bunny avatar." I'm fine with this. If I leave, they won't be impacted. 9% of people will wonder and really want closure. 1% of people here will get closure if I can give it, and know me well enough to understand.

    As for fully-public "I'm leaving" messages, I take them on a case-by-case basis. I find most in the "self-serving" or "reflective" category.

  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by Butterfly Mage View Post
    My opinion of most "goodbye" threads is that the author is really saying "please, please, PLEASE beg me to stay! You'll really miss me if I'm not here". The overwhelming majority of the time, the folks writing these threads are either newbies or people with single-digit rep. In other words, most of the "goodbyes" come from people who are so new that we never knew them anyway.
    ^ this

    It's usually always a trite "IF I LEAVE YOU'LL ALL BE SO DISTRAUGHT! STROKE MY EGO RIGHT NOOOOOOOOOOOOW" kind of affair and everyone is like "who are you" and they're like "FFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

  10. #10

    Default

    I would just make it a quick and brief thread that would tell you guys that I was leaving. Too bad I have no reason to leave this site just yet!

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