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Thread: Mmkay. Awkward time.

  1. #1

    Default Mmkay. Awkward time.

    Right, so, I really hate talking about this sort of thing, but I cannot really speak about this with a therapist, because it would reveal my TB/DLness.

    Okay. SO. I have this girlfriend, I love her a lot. She's the first real relationship I've ever had. I'm not overtly sexual about people, never have been. I had my first infantilistic impulses when I was three years old, so it is deeply set in my genetic makeup. By the time I hit puberty, it was not about girls or guys or anything - it was about diapers. So, now that I have someone who I'd like to be sexually involved with, the main barrier I have is that, though I am able to... ahem... 'get arroused', the climax part of it doesn't happen as easily because physicality is not my main thing.

    So is there anyway around this? I love her so much, and I have no problem making her happy in that regard. But she keeps thinking there's something wrong with how I look at her, and that's the reason why I don't 'finish off' as well. I'd like to tell her a little more about my reasons, but I know that she thinks that furries are weird. So I know she'll think infantilism is weird too.

  2. #2


    I think, that if you were to take a really cautious approach to this, you could reveal your desires, gauge her response, and see if you can come to some sort of understanding. Seeing as though she notices you aren't fully "There", and don't "Finish", are really good signs that she's concerned that she might be doing something wrong, or there is something you aren't 100% on.

    Tell her, without mentioning diapers, at all, that you would like to have a bit more "Fun", instead of just the act, itself. Ask her what she would be interested in doing, and see what you might find interest in. Then, if there comes a point where you feel you could reveal your AB/DL desires, then tell her. Make sure to let her know, that if she doesn't like the idea at all, you won't bring it up again, and that you're doing this to see if you could open up another world, to her.

    I'm sure your girl has enough freak in her, to where you guys could do SOMETHING (Maybe not diaper roleplay), and you could reach your climax. You have to remember, despite how strong it is, Infantilism is a PART, of your sexuality. I think you're putting too much focus on it, and you don't realize that you CAN get aroused by other things. Maybe not as strongly, but I'm sure you can find something that hits that spot.

    When discussing the issue with her, if you sense that it isn't going to go well, dismiss it. Tell her you aren't ready to reveal it, there's a good possibility that she'll realize you don't want this to affect your relationship, but it's something you want to tell her. Hopefully, she'll come to you, and bring it up again. If so, I think you're in somewhat safe waters. No guarantee that she'll be up for diapering you, but I think she'll still accept you. That also depends on how long you two have been together, and how far/long you see the relationship going. But, like they say "You'll never know, unless you try". If she's nice enough, and loves you enough, she'll still love you after knowing this.

    That's my two cents, that's what I'd do if I were in your situation. I really wish you the best of luck, I think it will go ok. =]

  3. #3


    If you truly love someone, and believe they feel the same for you, then you should be able to be honest with them.

    Honesty is crucial in any relationship. If she feels you are holding something back it will hurt your relationship.

    I'm not saying that telling her is going to be easy. I've done it in several relationships. Many others here have also told their partners. Some take it better than others, but I urge you to take that plunge and see how strong your relationship can become with full disclosure.

  4. #4


    You actually could talk to a therapist about this while leaving out the diapers entirely. With or without them you should be able to get off. This can really be treated like any other male ED issue.

    Though you one day probably should reveal your desires, revealing it as the attempted fix could do more damage then help. Your sexual relationship with her should not hinge on it. If you're going to need diapers each and everytime you and your partner make love, it probably isn't going to work out.

    Let yourself build up a bit. If your masturbaiting to diapers inbetween a physical relationship with her, hold off on it to build up your arousal.

  5. #5


    ok this adivce is gonna sound nasty...but it's the truth

    if you can't please her "that" way, you know there are other ways.... for the less mature or the slow, i will enclose what i am implying in spoiler quotes

    When comes to the bedroom, let's just say that finishing early, does NOT mean you are forever going to be a bad lover. you just need some more technique

    now like the above posters i will say that there is an IMPORTANT emotional element to all of this. she needs to appreciate your fantasies too, give and take is always a critical part of a relationship.

    nothing puts the breaks more on a romance when you tell them what you want and they go "EWWWWWWW"

    if there isn't any comprimise it will just build resentment. and the relationship will NOT go well

  6. #6


    trojanman, I believe you read this wrong. He is the one who cannot finish.

    BTW I put emphases on your relationship in my first reply, but I would also encourage you to speak with your therapist. If you have a good one you should be able to talk to them with more ease that your girlfriend. Perhaps you could use your therapist to figure out if and how you wish to tell your lady.

  7. #7


    My advice would be to get to let nature take it's course, don't rush into anything and when nature calls be sure to have protection.

    There is no such thing as you can't get someone pregnant the first time, or any of the other stupid excuses kids use.

    I know of a few people who started a family way too early by accident.

  8. #8


    You can always wait for your girlfriend to come, then pull out and jerk off. She would probably prefer this to you thrusting away after she is finished. Eventually you will learn to relax and come during sex.

    There are also toys that go in your butt that can provide more stimulation.

  9. #9


    Guys, you are missing the point of this thread. He is not asking for tips on improving his sex life.

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