Anyone who is a mechanic, or does anything involing tools should appreciate this.
DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it spins around, smacks you in the chest and flings your soda across the room, splattering it against that freshly-stained heirloom piece you were drying.
WIRE WHEEL: Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench at the speed of light. Also removes fingerprints and callouses from fingers in about the time it takes you to say, 'Yeeeeow....'
ELECTRIC HAND DRILL: Normally used for spinning pop rivets in their holes until you die of old age, or for perforating something behind and beyond the original intended target object.
SKILL SAW: A portable cutting tool used to make studs too short.
PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation of blood-blisters.
BELT SANDER: An electric