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Thread: I feel really good about myself now.

  1. #1

    Default I feel really good about myself now.

    (first and foremost, sorry for being such a stranger!)

    I've been going through a lot of problems since I've last talked to you guys. I was in a 2.5 year relationship with a guy that I confided my secret to. He promised me he wouldn't tell, but did anyways. After beating me up and cheating on me 4 times, I decided to leave as he told people close to my my secret as I tried to do damage control. Ever since then, I've been so ashamed of myself for not only letting my secret out, but was ashamed at what I was because of the awful things people said about me.

    Now, I've been in a relationship with someone else, for about 10 months now. We suffered a lot in the romance department because of my fetish and inability to truly accept who I was: I couldn't tell him my kinks because it would scare him and he would do the same as my ex did. Also, I felt so...unattractive about my surpressed feelings. So long story short, our relationship plummeted. We just talked after not seeing eachother for a week. He showed up at my house crying, begging to be with me because he realized the error of his ways (he was always needy and materialistic, wanting me to spend 100% of my time with him). I told him I would drive to his house after work to talk.

    I had my mind set that I wouldn't get back with him. And he told me something that completley opened me up. He told me that I need to love myself before I love anyone else. And I told him that I don't love myself because there's parts of me I have a hard time accepting. He poked and prodded and I told him my secret. He wasn't shocked. He wasn't angry. He was obviously curious haha. He told me that he still loves me for me, and he's willing to do whatever it takes to help this relationship, even if it means putting one on himself. He was worried I was going to be a pedophile or into beastiality, and he was so thankful that all I was worried about was the fact that I like to wear diapers. It made me feel good though, to know that he is willing to do something he doesn't necessarily understand, to help me love myself and be comfortable with who I am.

    I'm sorry for wasting thread space, but I'm so happy right now, I thought I'd share it with you guys.

    -Andrew

  2. #2

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    Great story Drew! seems that the realization fell through after all. I just hope i find someone who accepts me(i am a new babyfur) for who i am later in life as well. I relaly glad that happened for you. take care!

  3. #3

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    Not a waste of thread space at all--thanks for sharing. You described a pattern that's been on my mind for a very long time: feeling unattractive or somehow fundamentally flawed, but being unable to do anything or talk about it.

    It was good to see that communication saved the day. That appears to be the common antecedent to a happy relationship for AB/DLs. I'd like to get there as well, but am pretty reluctant to spill all this out on someone.

    Shucks...sorry for a short, non-conversation-supporting response. I haven't had any coffee yet, and this is a pretty heavy topic to tackle without some coffee support. Anyhow, nice to e-meet you, Drewsky, and congratulations. I hope it goes well for both of you, and see you around the forum.

  4. #4

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    The thing that you've got to remember is this is a support community. So it's perfectly alright to make this thread, and it should be encouraged - this isn't another 'OMG which diaper should I get' thread. It's obviously something that's important, and you obviously wanted to get it off your chest, so I welcome you sharing.

    As for your situation; I've never had the courage to share such a personal secret like what you've done with your partner, so I think that deserves congratulating. It's fantastic that you've got over this mess, and then had the courage to keep going with your life, and tell your new partner.I find that amazing, something I could never do.

    I hope your friends managed to accept you for who you are and you've managed to move on, removing your first partner from your life.

  5. #5

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    Sounds like you broke through a lot of self-barriers there andrew. Keep them down, don't be afraid of who you are because honestly, no one else is...

  6. #6

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    Thank you all for your kind words. It really did give me the self confidence boost I lacked. I don't know if this is too graphic or not, but for the 10 months we've been going out, we lacked a lot in the sex department, but after we both experimented with my fetish, we did it 4 times in one day, and once more in the morning. This has caused such a massive improvement, I didn't even know it was possible.

  7. #7

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Drewsky View Post
    (first and foremost, sorry for being such a stranger!)

    I've been going through a lot of problems since I've last talked to you guys. I was in a 2.5 year relationship with a guy that I confided my secret to. He promised me he wouldn't tell, but did anyways. After beating me up and cheating on me 4 times, I decided to leave as he told people close to my my secret as I tried to do damage control. Ever since then, I've been so ashamed of myself for not only letting my secret out, but was ashamed at what I was because of the awful things people said about me.

    Now, I've been in a relationship with someone else, for about 10 months now. We suffered a lot in the romance department because of my fetish and inability to truly accept who I was: I couldn't tell him my kinks because it would scare him and he would do the same as my ex did. Also, I felt so...unattractive about my surpressed feelings. So long story short, our relationship plummeted. We just talked after not seeing eachother for a week. He showed up at my house crying, begging to be with me because he realized the error of his ways (he was always needy and materialistic, wanting me to spend 100% of my time with him). I told him I would drive to his house after work to talk.

    I had my mind set that I wouldn't get back with him. And he told me something that completley opened me up. He told me that I need to love myself before I love anyone else. And I told him that I don't love myself because there's parts of me I have a hard time accepting. He poked and prodded and I told him my secret. He wasn't shocked. He wasn't angry. He was obviously curious haha. He told me that he still loves me for me, and he's willing to do whatever it takes to help this relationship, even if it means putting one on himself. He was worried I was going to be a pedophile or into beastiality, and he was so thankful that all I was worried about was the fact that I like to wear diapers. It made me feel good though, to know that he is willing to do something he doesn't necessarily understand, to help me love myself and be comfortable with who I am.

    I'm sorry for wasting thread space, but I'm so happy right now, I thought I'd share it with you guys.

    -Andrew
    i am in the same boat you are in, i am very afraid to tell anyone, but congradulations =]

  8. #8

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    I hope your new relationship continues on and on. To tell someone else is always difficult to do because we never know how others are going to react. As you know, one reaction was bad, and one went well. There's no way of telling how things will go. As for me, only my wife and my college room mate know, and I was very late in telling either one of them. Both understand me very well, and both love me, so I'm very lucky.

  9. #9

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    Drewsky,

    Wow! I am so sorry about what happened in your first relationship, and now so envious of your current relationship. I have NEVER had the courage to tell any of my BFs about my diaper interest. I'm just too afraid of what they could do with that information. I think it does create a distance between me and them - interferes with "emotional intimacy" which then leads to physical. For that, as well as a number of other reasons, I have never been very successful in the dating/relationship area. Maybe one day I'll finally make myself vulnerable enough to tell. But, cudos to you for doing it.

    MyWorld

  10. #10

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    Wow, congratulations Drewsky.

    I, like you, struggled with this for a long time. Sometimes I would avoid relationships because I knew there would be no way to tell the other person about my secret. After you come to realize it is part of you and isn't going to go away, you just have to try to be optimistic about it. It's not worth getting upset over. Instead, embrace it and just go with the flow. If its something you enjoy, and it's not hurting yourself or others, then you really have nothing to worry about.

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