I've had some interesting thoughts, lately.
(great way to start a thread, eh? Go figure)
Anyway, I've begun to think that my infantilism may be more of a coping mechanism designed to create a logic for why I like to wear diapers.
I've not always had an interest in acting like a baby, but I've ALWAYS had an interest in wearing diapers...since I was three years old. My interest in babyhood has been quite recent compared to diapers (around puberty and the internet, actually).
In all of these years of liking wearing diapers, I have never found a logical reason. It just is.
Everything in babyhood seems centered around diapers, and I realize now that I would not want to experience babyhood without them (such as in a poorer country or hundreds of years ago).
So, it seems that I have constructed my desire to act like a baby in order to create a logic for why I want to wear diapers. I recall, now , that I had been disgusted at the thought of peeing or pooping in diapers (before puberty; I think the sensation of wetting or messing is more sexual than anything else)...but I saw babyhood as the only medium in which I would be able to wear diapers freely. So, I adopted babyhood to justify my diaper-wearing.
For somebody like me, having a reason (I am a strongly logical thinker) is highly imperative to maintaining an internal peace. Maybe, the best route to finding an inner peace is to accept that I will be wearing diapers for the rest of my life...as if I were incontinent and had no choice. Honestly, because this seems to be an innate tendency--like left-handedness--and I do not seem to have a choice in the matter. The severity of the emotional itch will vary from time to time, but it will always be there.
Does anybody else feel similarly?
I don't believe this will apply to most of the AB/DL population, but it is one idea...maybe a piece to the puzzle.