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Thread: How should an AB feel about their birthday?

  1. #1

    Unhappy How should an AB feel about their birthday?

    Tomorrow is my birthday, and I never really enjoy them. Part of it is that this will be the fourth year where I've been away from family and friends on my birthday, and part of me doesn't want to get any older. While I'm always telling myself I'm still young, I still tend to feel that I made mistakes, some big, some small; some too late to fix, and other that might just seem too late to fix.

    And then there's being an AB. I din't want to grow up in the first place. How should someone who wants to be a baby again, if only in fantasy, feel about getting a year older?

  2. #2


    I think that it's ridiculous to let infantilism govern your emotions about anything, aging included. You can't stop it. You might as well look at the bright side of getting older, because you're always doing it. AB or not, you should feel good about a birthday. You survived another year and have a whole year to better yourself. And you're another year wiser, too!

  3. #3


    Find something to do that turns you on. Remember that every year is a new year, a year that you can re-invent yourself. Believe me, I have felt the same way you do year after year. This year I decided to write a novel, and so that's what I'm doing, even at my age. I've taken my bike out of the basement and I'm going riding.

    You can't stop the aging process, but consider it a journey. You get out of it that which you put in. We weren't meant to stay as babies, but rather grow and experience life. Don't hide in the middle of a repetitious society, but go out there and do something that makes you unique. And by the way, Happy Birthday!

  4. #4


    It's not so much the AB thing as the feelinng that I missed some opportunities, and, while it might not be too late to go back and fix them, I don't won't to start over. Part of is probably more impatience than anything else. Going into my fifth year of school, maybe no more, maybe three more, maybe four or five. Just daunting, and I'm wishing life was simpler. And getting a year older, even if you're not that old, doesn't help that feeling. Also, can't say I'm looking forward to the next ten months. But its the months beyond that hold the most promise. Hard work ahead, and then hopefully a payoff. Also, I think getting drunk with my friends this weekend will help considerably.

  5. #5


    personaly i think you should just take it by day and see what happens... if it was my birthday which will be next month just go out and have some drinks

  6. #6


    When I turned 40, my wife and daughter took me to Build-A-Bear. The staff stuck the "I'm the birthday bear" sticker on me with my name and age and I had a great time making my bear.

  7. #7


    It seems the issue is definitely not really about being young or the AB side of things, considering you just said that getting drunk with your friends will likely help. Most babies and little kids don't get wasted. :P

    It seems the real issue here is not really the birthday, but the realizations you've mentioned about the work you still have to do, and this notion that you are behind or late with some things. Some people go back to school in their fifties, some twelve-year-old prodigies go to school. Neither one is better, they are both simply on their own specific path.

    I would say the worst thing to do is regret anything you've done. If you think back to when you made the specific decisions under consideration, and you really think that you didn't make the best decision possible, mold any regret you may have into a promise to yourself to make better decisions next time. Use the lesson you learn in reflection about these decisions to make smarter choices. Just be happy you have the brains to realize and criticize your own past decisions, and that you can see that you can do better. This is how you grow. Just don't let the regret linger too long before you turn it into something else.

    And, as it goes for birthdays, I always just pretend that I'm having my 5th birthday every year, and that the next day I wake up I am back to day one as a 4 year old. Enjoy a birthday like your little side wants to, don't let this silly worry about real aging spoil the fun you really want to be having. This isn't to say that I am living all the time as a toddler, but it certainly helps to entertain an idea about how I would be happy to have a birthday if I was still a kid, entering everything with excitement and a positive attitude.

  8. #8

  9. #9


    Quote Originally Posted by harris View Post
    It's not so much the AB thing as the feelinng that I missed some opportunities, and, while it might not be too late to go back and fix them
    This is true for 100% of people because it's the human condition. Can't get worried about it

    My mantra is based in decision theory: make the best decision you can given the information at the time. That way, there are no such thing as 'mistakes' because you couldn't have done better. But, it does let you learn by pointing you to how you 'could know better' for next time. Also, if there is no 'best' decision...then any of the options are equally good and if in hindsight one seemed better...who cares? It didn't seem better when you had to make the decision!

    Buck up!

  10. #10


    Harris you don't have enough birthdays to qualify you as old, in any way shape or form, yes we all get old in my case really old, but I do what I have always done I take it one day at a time.

    I try not to worry about tomorrow or next week or next year for that matter, there is little you can do about it anyway, sit back and enjoy the ride, have a little fun along the way or you will regret it when you get old.

    I did my share of stupid things, but from every stupid thing I did I learned something new or a different way of doing it to make it better or easyer.

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