This came up in another thread and I didn't want to derail it...so I figured it would be best to start a new thread. I know this has been discussed to a degree in other threads, but I wanted to kind of focus on it in particular.
For a lot of people who have a problem with homosexuality, one thing they believe to be true is that sexual orientation is a choice...particularly that homosexuals in some way shape or form choose to be gay.
My own sexuality is so complicated that it's hard for me to give a personal testimony....but because of my ABism, I've always believed that no gay person chooses to be gay...because I know that I never made any kind of active choice to be AB. I know you can't equate the two things, but I've always seen a similarity, particularly in the sexual realm. It's a lot more difficult to look into the causes of sexuality...whether it's genetic or environmental or whatever.
But I don't want to focus this thread on the cause of homosexuality. Instead, I wanted to look at this notion of a gay person choosing to be gay.
Personally, I have never heard a gay person completely come out and say "I actively chose (or still choose) to be gay. I sat down one day and decided that I was going to be attracted to the same sex as opposed to the opposite one." This further supports my position that gay people don't choose to be gay.
So I'm interested in a few things. First of all...if there's any gay person on here that can state in any way that they chose to be gay, I want to hear more about it. Things like how the decision was made, why it was made, when it was made, what went through your head...just as many details as possible.
But I also want to hear more about why some people believe that homosexuality is a choice. What makes you think that it is? Is there anything any gay person has ever told you that made you feel that way or confirmed your belief? I ask this because I myself am still a bit confused as to where this mentality comes from and why people feel this way...and I'd like to learn more about that.
What I don't want is any gay person saying "Anyone who believes that homosexuality is a choice is an idiot, and it should be obvious why it's not." To me, that's not helpful or informative. I think it's okay explain more about why it's not a choice and to describe that in detail...but to me the whole point is to inform other people about yourself, not tear down their own beliefs. This isn't necessarily a cut and dried issue.
But I definitely would like to hear people's thoughts and feelings.