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Thread: So it is generally understood that diaper exhibitionism is bad...

  1. #1

    Default So it is generally understood that diaper exhibitionism is bad...

    But like all things in life, it is not "black and white"

    Confession time... I like the idea of "being caught". I also am a conscientious person and realize that nobody in the general public cares to, or wants to, know about or see that I'm wearing a diaper. I don't think I'm the only one that feels this way, but I think the mob mentality (especially on this forum) states that this is wrong, and people suppress their feelings online because of it.

    I'd like to have a frank convo about it, and about how people do such a thing without having any detriment to others.

    Let me start by saying that other than at a gay club at fetish night (and of course closed-door ABDL events), the general public has never seen me in only a diaper, and never will. I personally enjoy the "possibility" of getting caught, and not the actual exhibition of what I choose to wear for underwear. I would never be like the guys that you see on Youtube, running into grocery stores half naked in only a diaper, or like the dude from AZ that died recently that lived his life as an AB, publicly.

    That said, I have encompassed diaper wearing into situations where if someone with a trained eye was paying attention, it would be obvious...

    I've gone to the beach (usually Plum Is. State Park here in MA, a desolate, and usually empty beach) with friends for playing volleyball or ultimate frisbee, or just to chill and get a tan, and I'll usually wear. I've always got shorts on, but who doesn't want an upper body tan , so the shirt goes, and I've usually got some sort of waistband sticking up. It's definitely a rush, and definitely fueled by adrenaline (those of you that have bought diapers in person know what I mean), and it doesn't seem to hurt anyone else, so I have no problem doing it.

    Nobody ever realizes, and I don't want them to either... It's the idea of being "caught", not the actual act.

    My question is... Are there others here that feel this way, but confine your feelings because of the ABDL social status quo, and if not, how do you enjoy doing so without any burden on the general populace?

    Also... I'm very happy with myself and the diaper thing, but this is an aspect of it that I've always been conflicted about. Should I relax, and just go with the flow, or should I hole-up and leave the diapers at home? Am I a creeper because I like the idea of being caught?

  2. #2


    Just a thought to get it started:

    Exhibitionism and "getting caught" are different things. And I suspect that either term has many definitions.

    Exhibitionism means, to me, something akin to flashing: Forcing oneself purposefully into the public eye, with the intention of being noticed for a specific thing. It is an aggressive act. It is, in my mind, a rude act.

    "Getting caught" means . . . I don't know. It's not a thing in my fantasies.

    Maybe you could expand on what it means to you? What's the result of getting caught?

    I know this isn't an answer to your question.

  3. #3


    I guess there isn't a "result"... In my case, it's the act of portraying the possibility of getting caught. The result is (at least for me) slightly pushing a boundary for a bit of an adrenaline rush. Morality and common sense always interject, but the slight possibility of someone saying "OMG. he's wearing a diaper" is good enough for me.

    For an analogy... It's kind of like getting an adrenaline rush from putting a coffee can of gasoline 50 feet away from a campfire. Sure, there is a chance that an ember could light it up and create a big bang, but chances are it isn't going to happen... But it's enough to get the adrenaline pumping in a firebug.

    Perhaps I should take up skydiving or something... I'm quite the adrenaline junkie, diapers or not.

  4. #4


    Yeah, it definitely sounds like there are easier ways to get that rush, and some that may be a little less rude.

    Just as long as you aren't like, trenching with a diaper and forcing people to see, I think you're alright. Creepy is when you force other people to get involved.

  5. #5


    Quote Originally Posted by NEJay View Post
    Confession time...
    Guilty as charged myself.

    Irrespective of it being a private, mostly sexually-driven fetish for me, I've never had much of a problem wearing them out in public, and I have done it on quite a large number of occasions. Although my goal isn't to attract attention or get caught, I simply delight in the act of pursuing something that is, for the most part, uniquely mine for the better part of the population I live in, not to mention having a chuckle about what other think of it. Having that mystery surrounding myself about why I'm wearing one is a smaller, but equally intrinsic part of the whole ordeal. That's how I enjoy 'public displays' without actually saddling other people around me. Although I won't deny that someone seeing me in one is pleasurably humiliating, I just won't go out of my way to make a point of it, despite knowing full well that my shirt isn't covering the top of it, my pants have come down a bit, or the bulge is quite noticeable.

    However, I do uphold respect and discretion when it actually comes to using them around other people -in all instances- and I think this is where the line should be drawn for any flaunting of this fetish in public. Incontinence aside, messing 'accidents' should generally be left to a private ventures in your own house. Wetting them is much less of a problem these days with diapers that are more absorbent and have odour-neutralising chemicals in them. The basic point is though, if it's going to smell, don't do it. Even if you aren't physically invading someone else's space, you can cause peripheral discomfort and disgust.

    In response to other diaper-fetishists opinions about this, especially within this community, I'm all for leaving it up to the individual to determine when taking it public is acceptable and when it becomes a nuisance. From a personal standpoint though, as I think most of you have picked up on, I think public displays can be noncontroversial provided they are practiced within a certain amount of common sense. General rules of thumb include not making a direct point about it, not fully exposing it, maintain some discretion and uphold respect for others, including being mindful of your smells. In the past I've spoken out against certain forms of public display and I still virulently defend those views, but I also understand that this practice is highly subjective. What I find acceptable and pleasing, another may instil outrage about it, and vice-versa.

  6. #6


    Quote Originally Posted by mirrored View Post
    Yeah, it definitely sounds like there are easier ways to get that rush, and some that may be a little less rude.

    Just as long as you aren't like, trenching with a diaper and forcing people to see, I think you're alright. Creepy is when you force other people to get involved.
    But the thing is... I don't see anything wrong with wearing a diaper under my swim trunks at a beach, or being obvious about tape sounds in an enclosed bathroom stall.

    I could see if I was one of those freaks that shows off his diaper to others on purpose, but that would scare the crap out of me... Far less anyone else. That isn't what I'm getting on about...

  7. #7


    First, there's nothing creepy about it, IMO.

    My experience is this: Explaining it is like trying to put your finger on a spot of mercury. You can't quite do it.

    I wear a diaper beneath my pants in public frequently. I do this discreetly; I take care not to have an obvious bulge or to have a strip showing above my waistband, etc., etc.

    Why I enjoy this, I can't put words to. Just can't. I think that it's simply because I like to wear a diaper, and so I wear one.

    I do know this, I don't want to be caught. I'm not doing it for the "danger." In fact, my wearing has nothing to do with anyone else. It's about just me.

    Except: If I have a fantasy about someone noticing, it is that another guy who is into diapers is the one who notices. And responds to me. That's all.

    Again, I know this doesn't answer your question.

    But maybe it's a kind of ineffable thing anyway . . . .
    Last edited by soren456; 17-Jun-2009 at 00:06. Reason: Typo

  8. #8


    I don't think you should feel 'guilty'. If you get caught, how do they know that its a 'fetish'? They don't. For all they know, you could be incontinent.

    I don't try to go out of my way to 'expose' myself, but wearing out in public is daring enough for me. I almost always make it a point though to wear if i'm going to the store to buy diapers. Other than that, I don't wear to much in public. Although, I did wear to the dentist last week, that was kinda fun.

    With that said, I really enjoy the idea of being caught....just not by someone I know.

  9. #9


    I don't think you can call it exhibitionism if you feel as though it is necessary to be discreet as well as feeling though "being caught" would be good.

    Exhibitionism, by definition, is the need for exposure. With what you have described, you do not have a need for exposure, just a desire for a potentially exciting exposure.

    As long as you are not forceful about "being caught" there is nothing to feel guilty about. I think almost every *B/DL has feelings about "being caught" and there is nothing abnormal or freakish about it.

  10. #10


    Lukie pretty much hit it right on the head as far as how I feel, though I'm probably a scosche less daring than he (unless I'm with friends, and a little liquid truth is involved ). I've definitely tested the waters before, but aside for very few instances, I've been extremely self conscious about "going too far", even if that means a centimeter of waistband showing.

    But then again... The self consciousness feeds into the adrenaline rush.

    Thanks Soren and Nicky for the "not a weirdo" comments... This is one of the few things I've been battling with since I was young enough to acknowledge the diaper fetish, and it's cool to hear that this is a somewhat normal phenomenon... At least as people in our mindset go. Especially as I'm connected between the ABDL lifestyle and real life quite thoroughly, I've been afraid to talk about this subject, and this is the first time I've let it roll.

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