I'm a long-time DL and have never quite found my place in the world. I'm 40, married with children, well-educated and have a successful career.
I struggle with my fetish. Quite frankly, I love it and do not want to ever give it up. My wife thinks I'm a freak, equates the fetish as being equivalent to telling her I was gay. It's not something I can say "okay, it doesn't exist." I can resist the urges, but it's something that's "always there."
I won't leave my wife because I won't abandon her or the kids. However, I want to be free to be me.
I love wearing diapers. I love how they feel. I love how they make me feel. I do realize how abnormal that is, but it doesn't make me want to stop feeling the way I do.
What I want more than anything is a relationship with a woman who accepts and even embraces me for me. I've signed up for all sorts of Diaper Fetish/Diaper Lover groups hoping to meet someone, but it seems that men outnumber women about 100 - 1 with this fetish. I've kind of resigned myself to never finding someone to truly be a soul mate.
I really don't know what the next step is for me. I'm hear to listen and hopefully to make friends.