How would you define DDLG?

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Calico

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I thought DDLG was just a man that takes care of his woman and treats her like a little girl.

My AB fantasies are a man that takes care of me, he changes me and gives me food and makes me dinner and he takes me out. He makes me feel loved. This sounds like most relationships right but this always gives me the daddy feeling and little girl feeling. I am not into being controlled or whipped or beaten or being a a property or owned by someone. I am not into humiliation or being tied up.

I think DDLG is defined by however someone wants it and you look for the right daddy who will do what you want in the relationship. If there is a daddy that wants to humiliate his baby girl or whip her and tie her up and gag her, he would not be the right daddy for her. I do think there are men out there that hide behind DDLG to be abusive because they don't seem to understand it's consensual. You don't just claim the label and use it to manipulate a woman and control her and make her your property.

Some people argue that is not what DDLG is and it's called age regresser or age play I am describing and that all people do is read the description and think "That is what I am into" than just doing further research about it.
 
DDLG is something I have often been perplexed by, not because it seems unseemly or strange to me, but because it's a relatively new term. For years I am an AB, I hear of other ABs, male and female and their dynamics with caregivers, not once did DDLG even blip on the radar until like a few years ago with the advent of Little For Big. Suffice it to say, out of curiosity, I've learned a few things regarding this.

DDLG has a distinct dominant/sub dynamic to it. The legitimate definition is literally, Daddy Dom/Little Girl.

Calico, your AB fantasies certainly seem to fall outside the realm of DDLG, they are a lot more in line with standard age-regression and AB/Caregiver relationship dynamics. From how I understand it, If you're not into control or humiliation or strict rules and you think of this more as a lifestyle than a kink, then I'm not sure you could consider yourself fitting into the DDLG box.

One thing I will add is that you aren't far off when you say that most people define what DDLG means to them and as a result, the practices and approach vary. This isn't unlike ABDL where the practices of all ABs and DLs differ slightly. Having been to munches and being familiar with my local kink community, I have met people who really love the controlling dynamic in DDLG, people whose age-play criss-crosses with BDSM and they really want a firm hand and strict rules and regulations. Then on the flip side, I have also know some who still consider themselves to be DDLG, but want more loving domination.

Really at the end of the day, to each their own, but based on the fantasies you've expressed, I don't think DDLG begins to describe what you are, what appeals to you and where your desires lie.

I said it at the top and I'll say it again, DDLG is quite literally defined as a Daddy Dom and Little Girl relationship dynamic, it is the point at which Dom/Sub dynamics (BDSM) and Age-Play converge. Unless you have the desire to be controlled and view being cared for as being dominated, then I don't think DDLG applies to you.

Just my opinion however based on my own research and the reading of your initial post :)

Anybody more knowledgeable about DDLG, feel free to chime in :)
 
DDLG is an amazing thing, for many years before I got into relationships with other ABDLs I had always thought about being cared for and looked after then I became a switch and I've been a daddy in my last two relationships. DDLG is part of BDSM as it involves a power exchange where one person primarily will take care of the other person but there are also sexual tendencies involved, like punishments and humiliation for example. It is a very special thing that I enjoy myself a lot.
 
I don't know if I'm the only one that actively separates DDLG and ABDL. I feel like they've got some things in common, but they're not the same thing at all and shouldn't be used interchangeably.
 
I feel like CG/L (because Little subs can come in genders other than girl and dominants can come in flavors other than Daddy, guys) can be kept separate from ABDL, but can have some overlap. A Little could be a DL, but the Little one is generally "older" than an AB tends to be and has more agency.
 
CuddleWoozle said:
I don't know if I'm the only one that actively separates DDLG and ABDL. I feel like they've got some things in common, but they're not the same thing at all and shouldn't be used interchangeably.

I subscribe to this as well, often wonder why so many people conflate the two. Also forgot to mention, most of what I've read about regarding DDLG has it as exclusive to a girl and Daddy dynamic, so it only applies to the female population of Age-Play and most who identify as DDLG regress to more of a small child age, not a baby like myself. I agree with you, there is some overlap, for instance; regression, diapers, caregiver dynamics, but at the end of the day, I'd say the more dominant element of DDLG is the dom/sub power exchange, which I think almost renders it exclusively as a more kink oriented thing.

That being said, it's more than feasible that someone can be an AB/DL and be into DDLG. The terms can be used and explored in conjunction with one another, but I agree, they shouldn't be looked at as one and the same.

OmiOMy said:
I feel like CG/L (because Little subs can come in genders other than girl and dominants can come in flavors other than Daddy, guys) can be kept separate from ABDL, but can have some overlap. A Little could be a DL, but the Little one is generally "older" than an AB tends to be and has more agency.

Oooh, I like that term better, CG/L, definitely more inclusive and it seems to stress more of a caring element :)
 
Reason why I see DDLG being a form of ABDL is because ABDLs also use it and there are diapers involved and punishments and when I have read erotic ABDL stories, it always involves DDLG and I had stopped reading those because of how intense they were. I am into the innocent side, no bondage, no humiliation, no master or being property of someone or a pet. ABDL can be mixed into BDSM, same as DDLG.
 
I completely understand the type of relationship you're thinking about @Calico, and I'm pretty sure I'd actually like to be a caregiver in one.

I'm completely new to the "dating" scene of ABDL so... How should I go about expressing this on a profile in the best way ?
 
Calico said:
AReason why I see DDLG being a form of ABDL is because ABDLs also use it and there are diapers involved and punishments and when I have read erotic ABDL stories, it always involves DDLG and I had stopped reading those because of how intense they were. I am into the innocent side, no bondage, no humiliation, no master or being property of someone or a pet. ABDL can be mixed into BDSM, same as DDLG.
Were you ever told in school "all squares are rectangles but not all rectangles are squares"? Well, the case with AB's, DL's, ABDL's, Littles, BDSM and DDLG is more like "All squares are shapes but not all shapes are squares". DDLG is pretty much a square while BDSM is the rectangle, as a primary feature of DDLG is the Dom/Sub relationship which is even mentioned in the title Daddy Dom/Little Girl. Without that relationship it can't be DDLG. So, DDLG will always be a square. When it comes to ABDL and the like it could be a square but could just as easily be a triangle or a hexagon. Some ABDL's may like the Dom/Sub aspect while other may not include it at all. Likewise, somebody could be DDLG and not be ABDL. It all depends on the individual, so the only real set guidelines for these things are the qualifications in the names themselves. You can't be DL if you don't like/love diapers. You can't be AB if you're not an adult that acts like/feels like a baby/toddler. There doesn't have to be punishments with either and with AB there doesn't have to be diapers, nor do either have to be sexual at all. You can't be DDLG without that Dom/Sub relationship. DDLG can't be classed as a form of ABDL. ABDL can't be classed as a form of DDLG.
Personally? I'd never do DDLG. I can't stand the kind of contact a caregiver would need to make and I am not comfortable with anybody seeing the areas of me one would see changing a diaper. I'm not into the strictness or people telling me what to do. For me, BDSM is fifty shades of not in the lifetime, so no appeal there either. Yet I'm still AB, without any kind of DDLG.
 
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