I have been wearing PUL Gary briefs for years now (thanks again Dogboy recommendation!), the breathable fabric means no more uncomfortable heat in my pants. The forward facing leg holes are ideal for when sitting. As we all note, you must have an absorbent brief underneath or you will get leaks most likely at the leg holes when you move. For long airline flights (8-9 hours) I like an M4 or Rearz pirate disposable beneath my PULs as they have been 100% reliable for long term wetting (full loads). For short flights I have adult training underwear that is thick enough (but not like a full SAP diaper) that I can let go a bit to take the edge away and at the end of 4 - 5 hours my training underwear is quite wet but no excess fluid built up anywhere to leak. The PULs are the best after many previous vinyl pants I have tried over the decades.
For cleaning I have done the shower and shampoo for quickness in the morning but being in hotel I sometimes [not often] have to leave them to dry behind the bathroom door (maid service has never said anything to me but I know they must have seen them hanging there!) but if it is summer I leave them in my rental car in the trunk and the heat of the summer gets the trunk up to abut 110+ F and dries them quite well. If I leave them in the car on the floorboards I risk someone at my work site walking by and if the look hard enough, seeing them there. Or the heat of the summer can easily get my car up to about 130+ F inside and I am concerned this may be too much heat and ruin them quicker. For other times I noticed after a simple shower washing, the smell is not as good afterwards so I use the hotel washing machine for a more complete cleaning. I am sure people have come along and opened the lid when they thought it might be empty and see my adult training underwear and plastic underpants but once again no one has ever said anything to me when I came into the room and they were waiting (I carry a plastic grocery bag to put my items into from the washer so it is not so obvious when I leave).
Just a month ago I went to a local Laundromat and used their washing machine. The attendant was very nice getting me started and I used one dryer for my training underwear (which was rather obvious with the front door being glass) and another dryer for my plastic underpants but on low heat / fluff. The attendant was very helpful when I mentioned having only a few items and sometimes they "stick" to the outer dryer wall and do not dry very well. She gave me 3 tennis balls to bounce around in the drum to keep my items from sticking to the drum [but makes it a bit noticeable what was drying inside). Most of the people there were very friendly and seemed to care vey little about what undergarments you were washing /drying. The tennis balls seems to be an old-school trick that I have never heard of and I was rather amused by it but no one else seemed to bat an eye.