Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 18

Thread: Soon-to be-parent, conflicted with ABDL desires

  1. #1

    Unhappy Soon-to be-parent, conflicted with ABDL desires

    I haven't been able to track down any discussion on this topic, but it's quickly becoming a source of anxiety for me personally.

    I've struggled with the ABDL binge/purge cycle on and off for about 8 years now.
    It was a distant fantasy in my childhood, but I started experimenting with wearing premium diapers in college, and enjoyed it too much.
    I did it in secret from my girlfriend for the first 3 years of our relationship until getting caught through my browsing history. This put a huge dent in our relationship, and has had extreme consequences in her trust ever since (coupled with a past porn addiction).

    After getting caught I stopped for a few more years until settling back into secretly divulging again for the past 2 years, until you guessed it, getting caught wearing diapers in bed, BIG MISTAKE. She nearly left me that night.
    We have a very strong and personal relationship with each other, and try to discuss things with each other openly, but she is 100% opposed to it, and I love her enough to respect her wishes, as I value our relationship over my own fetish, however as many of you are aware, it's not always something you can control and the desire is always there.

    We're married now, and a new source of stress has been realized, as she is pregnant. While I'm excited to meet my new daughter, I'm worried about the temptation with all the baby stuff around. I already get nervous whenever someone starts a conversation talking about diapers, and I've discussed this openly with my wife to avoid conversations about them. I get butterflies in my stomach and want nothing more but to curl up in a ball wearing a diaper.
    Our baby shower was recently, and every diaper and pacifier I saw sent shudders down my spine.

    I feel like this should be a more prevalent topic in the abdl community, is anyone here a parent that went through this situation? And for the younger people, are you worried when you reach this stage in life?

    I'm terrified I'm going to be stealing my daughters diapers and pacifiers and curling up in her crib when my my wife and child aren't home. My greatest fantasy is being in a baby room surrounded my baby stuff wetting myself, and I'm paralyzed with stress that's going to happen.

    Any advice/ personal experiences?
    Last edited by Lionhead; 16-Apr-2018 at 19:58. Reason: grammar

  2. #2

    Default

    I was there Lionhead, although I had stomped down the urges after I got married, and kept them down for many years; 30 years to be exact. I tried to broach the subject once with my wife but it did not work, she thought I was joking and I did not press it.

    I worried about the same things you worried about when my child was born, but ya know what. It was OK, through those years although the urge was there it was very very diminished. There were just too many other things of greater importance, mainly raising my son that took precedence. The diaper attraction just was not the same when we were taking care of a little one for real. At least it was not for me anyways.

    Although my wife knows now and has been wonderful about my AB side, I am really glad that I did not make this an issue through those years as it really would have diluted my wife's experience with her, "real" baby. Even in retrospect, I would not do it any differently.

    In the end it all worked out just fine. Whatever you decide, I hope it works for you.

  3. #3

    Default

    Thank you for sharing your experience, it gives me some comfort. I hope my sense of responsibility and parenting will overcome those desires.
    Right now it's just the thought of it being as issue that's bothering me, I'm thinking of a quote now.

    “You cannot keep birds from flying over your head
    but you can keep them from building a nest in your hair”
    -MLK

  4. #4
    Maxx

    Default

    I suppose it depends on the level and extent of your compulsion, and how well you separate fantasy and reality. I've had kids and now grandkids (oldest grandchild 21, youngest 4). When playing with or babysitting with them, my own love for diapers was in a faraway place. No temptation at all. Zero crossover between my fantasies and the real world.

  5. #5

    Default

    I guess one thing I want to make clear is I know I would never expose my children to anything like that, or fall into those thoughts while they're around. My main concern is with stealing their diapers, pacifiers, etc. while nobody is home. There was never a moment a rogue diaper was laying around the house while you were home alone that you snuck off with? Or at least a temptation of that sort?
    I've played out my fantasies with both premium adult diapers, as well as local bought pull-ups etc. and I fail to see the difference if you're home alone left to your own devices with these kind of objects around.

  6. #6
    Maxx

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Lionhead View Post
    I guess one thing I want to make clear is I know I would never expose my children to anything like that, or fall into those thoughts while they're around. My main concern is with stealing their diapers, pacifiers, etc. while nobody is home. There was never a moment a rogue diaper was laying around the house while you were home alone that you snuck off with? Or at least a temptation of that sort?
    I've played out my fantasies with both premium adult diapers, as well as local bought pull-ups etc. and I fail to see the difference if you're home alone left to your own devices with these kind of objects around.
    Nope. Half a century ago as a pre-teen and young teen, I experimented with my younger sister's cloth diapers, but that's an entirely different deal.

    Perhaps it has something to do with my being strictly DL. Baby and little kid's diapers and things have never appealed to me.
    Last edited by Maxx; 16-Apr-2018 at 21:34.

  7. #7

    Default

    My experience is similar to what others have said. I've been ABDL for 40 years or so and went through many, many binge purge cycles. I've been married for about 20 years. My wife and I had twin daughters 11 years ago. When my girls were born my ABDL side just tamped down by itself - the little ones were more than enough. I never had a desire to sneak a diaper or pacifier from them. As they've gotten older my ABDL side reemerged. I finally told my wife about that part of me last year. Fortunately though she was understanding and doesn't mind since it makes me happy, but I definitely keep it separate from the kids.

  8. #8

    Default

    I have 2 kids a 14 year old stepdaughter and a 6 year old. I was able to keep the diaper thing to just my need to arrest for medical reasons. The easiest way I see is to keep your own stuff. Pacifier, diapers, etc, this way you are not taking the babies stuff. Allow yourself time when you do not have to be dad.

  9. #9

    Default

    Hello

    I went into a deep purge when we got engaged and it lasted for 8 years.

    During that time I had 2 kids.

    The urges of AB/Dl and Real life "surprise packages" are two entire different realms. IT is ok to be a little jealous, but just about that time there is the no mistaking that "sound" and the smell hits. As you are chasing a 18 month old with a loaded diaper so you can change them and trust me Little desires is not what is on you mind!

  10. #10

    Default

    Hi Lionhead,

    I'm a parent and I was also concerned when my first child came along, not so much that I'd steal anything, but that it would cause me more stress because of all the baby things around. But like egor says, when your kid is running around with a loaded diaper it's not much fun and it certainly didn't make me jealous. I think you may come to realize that you are able to separate real babies from your own fetish - when you change diapers round the clock, they lose a lot of their "mystique" ... especially since you're not the one wearing them!

    Do take time for yourself and to indulge this side of you when you can. My soon-to-be ex was a bit like yours but she knew about this side of me early on - she was okay with it if it was out of the bedroom, and I would have never dreamed of wearing around her or even chancing doing something where I could get caught, so I was always very, very discreet. So I don't know what to tell you there. But what I can say is whatever you do with your relationship, this ABDL part of you isn't going anywhere and you should find some outlet for it. It doesn't have to be much or even involving wearing, but be kind to yourself and give yourself some release valve for it. Trust me ... don't let it build. I'm no psychologist and so my advice is just that ... advice. But I think in some way you need to find a way to sort this out with your wife for long term happiness for you both. How you do that is up to you. My separation and pending divorce were not primarily about ABDL, but as I've often said, being ABDL didn't help, either.

    I wish you both the best on your new journey into parenthood and I wish you strength and peace with your ABDL side.

    Be well,

    Tab

Similar Threads

  1. Conflicted
    By PaddedDeist in forum Incontinence
    Replies: 13
    Last Post: 14-Aug-2017, 21:28
  2. Anyone else having largely fluctuation ABDL desires?
    By BabyLink in forum Diaper Talk
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: 26-Jun-2014, 20:51
  3. What was your "trigger"? (first time you felt your abdl desires)
    By PurpleDinosaur in forum Adult Babies & Littles
    Replies: 39
    Last Post: 25-Oct-2011, 01:48

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
ADISC.org - the Adult Baby / Diaper Lover / Incontinence Support Community.
ADISC.org is designed to be viewed in Firefox, with a resolution of at least 1280 x 1024.