Mixed fellings

Hello, first off I have good news. My brother is finally leaving today for the Army. Which you would think I would feel happy about this, but I kinda have mixed emotions about this where I feel both happy because I don't have to see his annoying, abusive, Jerk, face, but I feel sad because I don't want to be alone because he can be nice and can be good company and I don't know what to do about it.