I've come to love wearing a diaper. Not in the sense that I see so often here, but in a different fashion. I love that they hide my issue. It took me about 15 years to finally realize that I love them. I call them my magic underwear. Simply because they magically hide my issue from anyone who doesn't know my issue. Sure, certain friends and family know I wear, and that I call them my magic undies, but to the common person, they don't know I wear (maybe some do, if I bend over, or raise my arms to reach something, but other than that - they don't, and no one has ever mentioned it.).
So, I'm comfortable in who I am, my problems, and how I deal. I've never, ever heard of someone meeting a person in a wheelchair, and ask them - why. Nobody would ask us "why" we wear if they saw any tell-tale signs. It just doesn't happen in the real world, as far as I know, from personal experience.
I'm happy with my decision. I wear because it's more comfortable for me. Yes, I try samples, trying to find that holy grail of absorbency, and, in that respect, I think I've found it in terms of disposables. I'm now venturing into the world of cloth, because I'm leaking at night. This has been a long 3 months trying to figure out what works. Sure, I can still use a disposable, but, with my recent leaking, and my desire to save money - I am trying cloth. My new challenges are washing, pinning, folding, storing, and how to reduce smells...... it's a hard road so far. But, I've got 15 years in some sort of plastic backed (cloth backed suck, because they weep, btw), and I'm not trying something to carry me thru the rest of my life. At 50, I've got to figure something out to save money. If I stay in disposables until I'm 80, my figure is it's gonna cost me $65k for the next 30 years. and - that's at my current 3 per day average, Maybe cloth will remove a third of that cost? I'm not sure.... but - I do know, that the next 12 months will give me a clue as to my next 30 (if I even live that long), lol.