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SometimesAdult

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  1. Diaper Lover
  2. Incontinent
I am currently "all in" and am wearing nearly 24/7. I started in June of this year. I still have the freedom to not use, and don't use when I am at an event with family and friends.

I worry about a couple of things. I do not want to lose the ability to choose over time (while my urologist claims that there will not be any long term physiological changes, I think that there could be changes in brain signals that would have to be undone or retrained). I find that I spend a lot of time thinking about it, and surfing the net to find products I think I will like. I work from home and stay home more than I should. Frankly, I am fairly obsessed.

Do other people experience the same thing? Have I crossed a line? It seems that a lot of others with this lifestyle are more relaxed about it.

I talked to my therapist about it and it was a disaster. She didn't get it, and was not willing to learn. I stopped discussing it because I don't want to report when and if I was using, and discussing it means that I have to take steps to change my behavior. I am not ready to stop, and the times I might be willing to try, my stash is too big to walk away from. Some people say that this need is hardwired and even if we stop, we will need to return. This has been in my psychological history as far back as I can remember. I feel like a diaper junky.

What say you?
 
Aside from docs and therapist I am pretty much in same shoes as you. I wear 24 7 and have been for what feels like a very long time. I don't use my diapers outside of my home though unless I know I'm headed there soon. One thing I recently did was opened up this subject with my bro who I am very close with. It helped me accept what I deep down enjoy which is wearing a diaper. But now I have actually had the words come out of my mouth to my bro "yeah I wear a diaper, so is that going to be an issue?"
He is going to be living with me and I didn't want to give up my freedom and self acceptance.

Moral to the story is that you dont have a problem as long as you can maintain your independence. And most of all you wear a diaper for your own personal reasons, so love yourself for it.
 
How did your brother handle it? For me, my biggest fear is that my siblings find out about it, it gets out to their families, and I am judged or ostracized. If they do detect something wrong in that area, I have rehearsed my replies, including: "I have some plumbing problems, am working with a urologist and hope to have the problems resolved soon. In the mean time, I am using various degrees of protection depending on circumstances. Beyond that, I prefer not to talk about it".
 
Well he hasn't made any remarks in return but I literally just told him a few days ago.I also did tell him I wear for bedwetting which was a problem as a child. I plan on returning to only nighttime wearing once he is living with me. Now he did find my diapers years ago and would make fun of me whenever he was in a fit of rage but I never once acknowledged it back then. And right now he is in jail so I gained the courage to "out" myself in order to maintain my diaper freedom when he moves in upon his release in about 40 days.

I still don't know what it will be like when he is physically around. I of course will do everything I can to minimize the exposure of diapers to him when he's here.

I will say I did all of this for a few reasons

1- personal fantasy I've had for years regarding someone close to me hearing this info from my own mouth.

2- my own personal freedom

3- my own ACCEPTANCE of my desires and to show myself that I can not care what anyone else thinks no matter their relation to me or status among society.
 
I'm also 24/7 right now and diapers are fairly important to me. I wouldn't say I'm obsessed as I think there's a difference between how I was as a kid when I couldn't get them and now. I know this might sound like someone who is addicted but I could quit (24/7) right now if I wanted. I don't think I could quit thinking about them but I have gone through pretty lengthy periods of not wearing at all and while I wasn't as happy as having diapers, it didn't destroy me, either. I classify them as another one of my persistent interests and it's the sort of thing that could go too far but I think I've got it under control.

You seem to be active to a similar degree but more concerned about it. Do you feel out of control or are you just doing what you want? Could you ease off or take a break? Does that fill you with dread or sound appealing in some way? If you want to talk about it and your current therapist doesn't get it, I'd get a new therapist.
 
I have gone through bouts of obsession finding the diaper that works for me best and focus more on it than anything else (actually I do that with hobbies as well) but found it normalises over time.

I don’t think going all in is going down a rabbit hole just recognise when you have found a diaper/regime etc that works best at the moment and use that as a base for enjoying the rest of what life has to offer.

Please sack your therapist though, if she doesn’t understand that part of you she can’t actually help you and I would think is likely holding you back.

You are brilliantly fabulously terrific as you are and Diapers don’t harm anyone else so they should just be accepted at the very least by outsiders and loved by the wearer.

If BTW you become partially untrained you can always attempt retraining using discreet back products so I can’t see the harm.

Big hug.
 
Thanks everyone for your feedback and support. This is a very interesting journey. Right now, I prefer the lifestyle to any alternative that does not include it. I am spending a lot of money on supplies, but would prefer this to a vacation in a far away land. Go figure. But, I manage my business, take care of my dogs, go to the park every morning at 7, and see friends and family on an occasional basis. This is certainly not an ordinary preoccupation, but as long as I keep it private, and manage my responsibilities, I guess it is ok. I have a question though. Does your own behavior seem more natural or ok to you than the behavior that you may see in other people with the same tendencies, or does it all seem equally ok? I am wondering whether this is a better measure about how we deep down feel about it.
 
Sometimes I do feel shame about wearing diapers, but you can only accept it as part of yourself in the end. Having a large supply of diaper and browsing for items does not make you obcessed, just prepared. :p The behavior does not harm your wellbeing, or that of others around you. I know that wearing diapers is not necessairily a “natural” behavior, or a generally socially accepted behavior, but as long as you aren’t forcing the diapers on others, you have the right as a human to freedom of expression. And express your diaper side! This communty itself has helped accept my diaper side since everyone else has most the same thoughts and “issues” with the wearing lifestyle.
 
Personally I am 100% in touch with my diaper wearing self. I have a huge stash and wear 24/7. After reading many posts on here I realized I have been through the exact same problems with the diaper mentality. It was when I heard myself tell my brother that I wear diapers that I finally felt "completely in tune with who I am". It helped a lot especially when I didn't receive any negative feedback from him. It goes to show that you should be you and nobody really cares that your in diapers. Just respect others and you'll be respected in return.
 
You will not lose continence, just by wishing, or by using religiously. Forgetaboutit! Enjoy your wearing! Enjoy your using! Use whatever floats your boat, at that moment; toilet, urinal, tree, roadside, or Pampers.

You will not make yourself incontinent by hoping, or willing it. You will become more at ease wetting wherever you want, if you're diapered, AND you may occasionally forget you're not wearing, and have an accidental wetting, but you don't become incontinent by thinking it. Forget trying to get an uninitiated therapist to understand. Most never will, unless they're completely non-judgemental, which is kind of the opposite of their credo, FOR THE MOST PART. I had a reasonable therapist I told about the diapers, and she was smart enough toive on to the important matters I was there to solve. If diapers ARE your problemo, then that's a whole nother story.

- - - Updated - - -

By the way, we're almost all fairly obsessed about wearing & using diapers. It's different! It's secretive! It's unique, compared to most people we all know, and associate with. It can be a fun thing, if you let it. We've all had our paranoid moments, and we've all had to deal with times we had to NOT WEAR, to avoid detection (as in, living with curious roommates, siblings, parents, etc.). If your "thing" was picking your nose, you'd probably wanna be just as discreet, right?
 
It can be easy to feel that you're "obsessed", but the reality is quite different. You have a powerful interest that makes your life more interesting, there's nothing wrong with that. I understand how you feel, I've been there. What you need to do is fully accept diapers as part of your identity, and your life. You don't need to hide it behind a brick wall, let it be a part of your daily life. In my case, I had less of a choice as I deal with moderate urinary incontinence, but the choice to wear diapers rather than continue with muscle therapy was mine and mine alone.

There is one thing that you can do: Take some time off the internet, spend some time experiencing life outside of the house. There's no point in having an interest like diapers unless you enjoy it in as many ways as you can. Moderation is key, but never let it stop you from having fun.
 
SometimesAdult said:
Thanks everyone for your feedback and support. This is a very interesting journey. Right now, I prefer the lifestyle to any alternative that does not include it. I am spending a lot of money on supplies, but would prefer this to a vacation in a far away land. Go figure. But, I manage my business, take care of my dogs, go to the park every morning at 7, and see friends and family on an occasional basis. This is certainly not an ordinary preoccupation, but as long as I keep it private, and manage my responsibilities, I guess it is ok. I have a question though. Does your own behavior seem more natural or ok to you than the behavior that you may see in other people with the same tendencies, or does it all seem equally ok? I am wondering whether this is a better measure about how we deep down feel about it.

On occasion (mostly online) I see some who appear to be too deep into it. In general, the ABDLs I engage with might be more or less involved but they're managing fine. I'm sure there must be some fairly objective point where it's too much but it seems to me like too much is more readily described as being out of control. When your kink/fetish/urge is in the driver's seat rather than you, that's too much. If you're just being weird as part of your life, you're probably fine.
 
SometimesAdult said:
Thanks everyone for your feedback and support. This is a very interesting journey. Right now, I prefer the lifestyle to any alternative that does not include it. I am spending a lot of money on supplies, but would prefer this to a vacation in a far away land. Go figure. But, I manage my business, take care of my dogs, go to the park every morning at 7, and see friends and family on an occasional basis. This is certainly not an ordinary preoccupation, but as long as I keep it private, and manage my responsibilities, I guess it is ok. I have a question though. Does your own behavior seem more natural or ok to you than the behavior that you may see in other people with the same tendencies, or does it all seem equally ok? I am wondering whether this is a better measure about how we deep down feel about it.

Heck yes. I've seen WAY too many people acting idiotic or outright stupid. Compared to them, most of us here act outright normal.
 
Trevor said:
On occasion (mostly online) I see some who appear to be too deep into it. In general, the ABDLs I engage with might be more or less involved but they're managing fine. I'm sure there must be some fairly objective point where it's too much but it seems to me like too much is more readily described as being out of control. When your kink/fetish/urge is in the driver's seat rather than you, that's too much. If you're just being weird as part of your life, you're probably fine.

Slomo said:
Heck yes. I've seen WAY too many people acting idiotic or outright stupid. Compared to them, most of us here act outright normal.

I was going to answer the question in almost the same way as the two wonderful posters above have done. I did just want to add a couple of points around behaviour while we are on the subject. My conclusions to a lot of fetish and kink thoughts is that most people are far to engaged in their own lives to really care what anyone else is doing. I used to worry a lot about having a diverse lifestyle but when a bunch of friends found out they simply shrugged their shoulders. Their attitude was live your life how you want. They were not bothered because it made no impact on them.

Also, in regards to family, this is a major issue for people within this community for obvious reasons. I like to hold on to the notion that family are for life, they are there to protect us no matter the situation, they love us and care for us no mater what. Yes it may be awkward if they found out and had questions, but I still believe that overall family bonds are stronger then a few odd lifestyle choices. As others have said, be yourself, accept you may have some odd hobbies and concentrate on the happiness and good times.
 
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