I don't know what forum to put this in. I had the single worst "caught" moment I could possibly think of today.

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mtdl88

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You can believe me or not believe me. But I swear this all happened today, and all before noon, to boot. I don't know if this is in the right forum. But it's the truthful events of this morning so I don't know if it qualifies as a story or not.

Yeah. Anyway. So I was flying back from a country overseas today that has a dubious reputation as a violent, drug-riddled hellhole. Anyway, due to the fact I booked the trip a day before I took off and only stayed 3 days in said place apparently set off a series of red flags that led to me getting interrogated by customs. I didn't have any drugs on me; I don't do drugs, and I sure as hell aren't going to be trafficking them. Anyway, once they went through my belongings, and then questioned me about being a "drug mule" and having baggies of drugs in my stomach (as an incon I just kind of LOL'd at that), I got taken to a back room to get thoroughly searched.

Here's the problem. I'm urinary incon and I wear 24/7 because it's quite frankly easier to deal with that way. The flight I was on had left at 7:15 and I didn't sleep all night owing to the fact I was going to fly out in the early morning and didn't want to miss my flight. I knew I would fall asleep on the plane. I had a Molicare Super Plus on and when I got off the flight, it was throughly soaked. I intended to change, but the bathroom was closed. So I was standing there, getting frisked heavily by 2 customs agents. Finally, one grabbed my rear-end area, and felt the "squish" of the wet diaper.

"Are you holding something?" He asked. You could almost hear his voice perk up as he thought he finally found the stash.

I told him "it's a diaper. I'm incontinent, and I need to change."

He said "Is there anything in it?""

I told him "yeah, piss."

Both seemed totally taken aback. The dude just kind of darted out chortling "I'll call about this" and the woman sat there half-dumbfounded. I told her "I"m sorry to make you go through this" and she told me, "It's a medical problem. I have a little niece, well, I guess she isn't little, she's 19 now, but she has the same problem. It's a medical problem." And just stared off. Finally the dude showed back up and told her something and she told me to follow them.

So this guy and a woman drug me off to some other room so I could take my diaper off for them and show them it wasn't full of cocaine or something. So I go into this room. I have to take my pants off, and I'm standing there in a shirt and a very wet diaper. The woman just kind of went "Jesus christ", and then ordered me to take it off. So I did. They then looked through it gingerly and poked at it, and the dude said "there's nothing" and then they told me I could wait and put a new diaper on and they'd wait outside. I did. They then escorted me back to my belongings and told me to leave.



I don't know what to make of the whole thing. It was surreal.
 
That's kind of funny. I mean, the part about you being like "Yeah, piss". I mean, couldn't they have figured that out from the squish? It's dumb that they thought it was cocaine or something. Why anyone would want to have that down there is beyond me. I guess of people are desperate enough... they might actually do it (I'm not saying you would... just people in general).

Anyway, I'm sorry you had to go through this... some airlines/airports can be so paranoid about these kinds of things. It's absolutely ridiculous, you know?
 
It is halfway hilarious looking back on it. But it was half-terrifying at the time.
 
Sigh...
All dydees get searched for dope.
 
that is hummiliating. I would be angry as hell.
 
Last year I spent a week in japan, and when I flew back I came through fort worth texas- with two bottles of alcohol AND a soaked diaper (I changed on the plane twice, but it was a really long flight). Customs there cleared me really quick with barely a glance.

It really is all about who you get and how paranoid they are.
 
I see you are from the middle east. Is that "violent, drug-riddled hellhole" you are talking about the U.S.? :smile:
 
You sound like someone who has never been to a violent, drug-riddled hell hole.
 
I wonder if after you left, the TSA agent tried to snort it anyway? I got frisked wearing Baby Pants training pants. His eyes got real big and I thought, "serves you right, ass hole."
 
AdorbzLittleGirl said:
That's kind of funny. I mean, the part about you being like "Yeah, piss". I mean, couldn't they have figured that out from the squish?...

Actually, that would be a clever way to transport drugs. I am sure that you read about the 16yo that transported dissolved methamphetamine from Mexico (drank, died, family received $1MM, yeah pure idiocy). A quick Google check finds that cocaine is not water soluble, but liquid meth in a slightly used diaper might work. I wonder what the response would have been if the OP wanted to take the diaper with him, lol.

And no, I do not drink, smoke, use drugs of any kind, no have any contact with any of those, period. This was just a mental exercise.
 
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