I have to get this off my chest.

I have to get this off my chest, for the last year i've been extremely suicidal, I don't know what to do and I fear it's getting worse.

everyday that goes by, the impulse gets stronger.

Ya, I totally understand you. While it hasn't been for the entire past year, it's been for a majority of it that my thoughts have drifted off into that territory a little too much for comfort. Not only do I fear it's getting worse, I am aware that it is indeed getting worse. There are only a few people keeping me afloat. But at the same time, there are those who seem to want to drag me down further by causing more problems than I need.