How to wear diapers with VERY strict parents?

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  1. Diaper Lover
So yeah, as you can tell from the title this is basically my predicament. Thanks to my birthday, I have the money to order almost whatever diapers I want online or anything in a store. The only problem is my parents, who I unfortunately still live with. They are very, very finicky about what I do, what I buy, what I order, where I am, and what and where my stuff is.

The whole process of buying and wearing diapers is fucked. I don't have a car that I can use to go anywhere to buy, and to my knowledge there are no stores within practical walking or biking distance. Even if there were, they would want to know exactly where I was going, who would be there, when I'd be back, and they'd call me regularly and check my bags when I got back. So then I'd have to order online, and that's still a problem. My mom sometimes checks to see what I've bought online, but not always. I'm never exactly sure when a package will get here, and if something gets here when I'm not there, they'll open it, or at the very least get extremely suspicious. They also check my room very regularly, and like to look through my stuff. The only place that's secure is my attic, and it's a tad hard to get up there and they'd wonder why I'm up there so much. And then there's the problem of actually wearing the diapers. The crinkling sound, the smell--they're very perceptive for things like that, especially my dad. They even look into the trash occasionally, always looking for something they accidentally threw away. And if they find out at all--and they have before--they would never let me see the end of it, as they tend to be very conservative.

So that's the situation I'm in. I still get the urges to wear all the time, but for this reason, I can never act on them. It sucks, really. There IS a large box of depends in the basement that used to belong to my grandfather, but those are huge and crinkly and generally not worth it. Is there anyone in a similar situation that has still successfully worn diapers? Please give me some assistance because I can't think of a solution on my own.
 
The best solution long term I think is to make a plan to get out of there and implement it ASAP. While I'm generally an advocate of "their house, their rules" when it comes to living with parents, your situation as described sounds pretty oppressive.
 
I also live with my parents and the sound is not a problem. I'm currently wearing a Crinklz (as you might expect, they should crinkle) but is not that much, just cover yourself with something (a coat or jacket) and you'll be fine.
 
I've been there. It's an extremely toxic situation to be literally 18 yet treated like you are 7 still with regards to privacy. Especially when you've done nothing wrong with regards to drugs, theft, etc.

I can't possibly urge you enough to do all you can to get out of there as soon as humanly possible. If you're still in high school, you can always finish that later, and tell any employers you already have a high school diploma, as no one ever checks. If it's for college, it isn't worth it to be treated like that for another four years. Especially not these days.

When you've lived your entire life that way, you don't realize just how abnormal that situation is. But trust me, it took me a decade to get over most of the mental hangups and intense paranoia, bordering on schizophrenia, that living with zero privacy for 18 years caused me. I still have major trust issues to this day over it. Combined with the other abuses I endured, I'll never talk to them again.

For the immediate time being though, what I did was makeshift diapers, and then throw them away elsewhere so they couldn't be found in the trash. But I had a car so it wasn't a big deal to drive to a nearby apartment complex to dispose of it all. If you have one within walking or biking distance, go that route when you're 100% sure neither of them will be home. Don't risk hiding things, even in your attic.
 
If I were you, I'd learn to be a bit more evasive when your parents want to know where you're going, etc. Over time you might be able to train them to be less nosy.

It's none of your parents' business if you want to wear diapers. Your life, your rules.

Maybe get a lockable trunk for your bedroom so you can lock your stuff away knowing your parents won't be able to find it...?
 
The best advice I can give would be to order small. Things like sample packs that are the size of a normal package and very discrete. As for wearing if you live where it gets cold winter is one of the best times of the year to wear as you usually have extra layers that help hide any noise or bulge. Other than that I would say wear at night when you aren't around your parents. I would also suggest you start ordering online more so your parents get used to getting packages in the mail and stop questioning it every time. I would also be prepared to have an excuse for what it could be so your not trying to think of an excuse on the spot.
 
Do you have an income of your own? Bank account? You can order online, have it delivered to a UPS Store, use Uber or something to give you a ride to pick it up.

In your situation though, work on becoming financially independent. I know it's easier said than done, but it could be something rewarding in your future and be able to do the things that your parents wouldn't agree with.
 
It's hard to be a good parent too.

Very sorry to hear of your predicament, I think most nosy parents just want to do the best thing by their kids and think whatever they might find they can fix if they need too.

It's a shame that there is absolutely nothing wrong with wearing diapers and it's such a deeply personal and wonderful thing but many parents go the nuclear route when they hear about it and then you hear of other parents barely blink when it comes to teen pregnancy and drug use.
 
I am trying, but the situation is a lot more complicated and much worse than you might think, unfortunately :/ I wish I could just pack up and go but I can't
 
this is one of those things you may have to put on hold til you can
 
goten said:
I've been there. It's an extremely toxic situation to be literally 18 yet treated like you are 7 still with regards to privacy. Especially when you've done nothing wrong with regards to drugs, theft, etc.

I can't possibly urge you enough to do all you can to get out of there as soon as humanly possible. If you're still in high school, you can always finish that later, and tell any employers you already have a high school diploma, as no one ever checks. If it's for college, it isn't worth it to be treated like that for another four years. Especially not these days.

When you've lived your entire life that way, you don't realize just how abnormal that situation is. But trust me, it took me a decade to get over most of the mental hangups and intense paranoia, bordering on schizophrenia, that living with zero privacy for 18 years caused me. I still have major trust issues to this day over it. Combined with the other abuses I endured, I'll never talk to them again.

For the immediate time being though, what I did was makeshift diapers, and then throw them away elsewhere so they couldn't be found in the trash. But I had a car so it wasn't a big deal to drive to a nearby apartment complex to dispose of it all. If you have one within walking or biking distance, go that route when you're 100% sure neither of them will be home. Don't risk hiding things, even in your attic.

Congrats on getting that username, I'm a huge DBZ fan :)

Can I Private Message you instead? You would be able to help me a lot I think, but I feel like it might give away some identifying information if we talk on this thread.

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irnub said:
The best solution long term I think is to make a plan to get out of there and implement it ASAP. While I'm generally an advocate of "their house, their rules" when it comes to living with parents, your situation as described sounds pretty oppressive.

Sorry I replied to your comment the wrong way, I think. I'm not used to this forum setup.
 
goten said:
I can't possibly urge you enough to do all you can to get out of there as soon as humanly possible. If you're still in high school, you can always finish that later, and tell any employers you already have a high school diploma, as no one ever checks. If it's for college, it isn't worth it to be treated like that for another four years. Especially not these days.

Oh damn. If OP's in high school, he's got perhaps six months to go. Trading the timely earning of a high school diploma for the option to wear and use diapers would be pretty short-sighted and self-destructive. I don't see that being a wise move at all. That would be like... robbing a bank to get money for drugs. Sure, you'd get your fix, but then you'd probably spend a decade or two in prison. On the other hand, if the OP is finished with high school and is either attending college or working (or looking for work), then yeah, it's probably time to start plotting an escape. And it might be good to get the parents in on that plotting. Birthday money doesn't come from mean parents, and nosiness is usually not the sign of uncaring parents. It may be the sign of parents who care a bit too much and are in denial about the fact that their child has grown.

497561832 said:
(privacy issue involving parents)

I would suggest that you sit down with your parents and talk about your concerns--without invoking diapers, that is. If specifics are needed, then by the general way you've described their nosiness, I suspect there are many non-diaper examples that you could produce to make your point. Assuming they do care about you, then you should appeal to that. Tell them how much you appreciate what they've done for you, but also tell them that the level of supervision you're receiving is discouraging, and is hastening the difficult decision between staying and benefiting from their help, and leaving simply to achieve some independence. Of course, that only works if you think they'd favor your staying--which I suspect they might, given how reluctant they seem to "let go." If, on the other hand, you believe that they want you to move out and get your own place as soon as possible, then I think the matter's been settled for you.
 
MeTaLMaNN1983 said:
Do you have an income of your own? Bank account? You can order online, have it delivered to a UPS Store, use Uber or something to give you a ride to pick it up.

In your situation though, work on becoming financially independent. I know it's easier said than done, but it could be something rewarding in your future and be able to do the things that your parents wouldn't agree with.

I'm working on it. I can't seem to be able to get a job, and even then I doubt I'd be able to hold one for very long. I do have a few hundred dollars that I've saved up, though. I'm trying hard to come up with a plan.

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Cottontail said:
Oh damn. If OP's in high school, he's got perhaps six months to go. Trading the timely earning of a high school diploma for the option to wear and use diapers would be pretty short-sighted and self-destructive. I don't see that being a wise move at all. That would be like... robbing a bank to get money for drugs. Sure, you'd get your fix, but then you'd probably spend a decade or two in prison. On the other hand, if the OP is finished with high school and is either attending college or working (or looking for work), then yeah, it's probably time to start plotting an escape. And it might be good to get the parents in on that plotting. Birthday money doesn't come from mean parents, and nosiness is usually not the sign of uncaring parents. It may be the sign of parents who care a bit too much and are in denial about the fact that their child has grown.



I would suggest that you sit down with your parents and talk about your concerns--without invoking diapers, that is. If specifics are needed, then by the general way you've described their nosiness, I suspect there are many non-diaper examples that you could produce to make your point. Assuming they do care about you, then you should appeal to that. Tell them how much you appreciate what they've done for you, but also tell them that the level of supervision you're receiving is discouraging, and is hastening the difficult decision between staying and benefiting from their help, and leaving simply to achieve some independence. Of course, that only works if you think they'd favor your staying--which I suspect they might, given how reluctant they seem to "let go." If, on the other hand, you believe that they want you to move out and get your own place as soon as possible, then I think the matter's been settled for you.

I am in high school, actually, and I am set to graduate in June. As I said before I do have a few hundred dollars saved up and I'm trying hard to think of a way to escape. It's really hard, though.
 
497561832 said:
I am in high school, actually, and I am set to graduate in June. As I said before I do have a few hundred dollars saved up and I'm trying hard to think of a way to escape. It's really hard, though.

Well, sit tight, then. Stay the course. June isn't far off, and if you're on track to graduate, you're best off doing that before making any other big, life-altering changes. Whether it's off to work or off to college after high school, having that diploma will greatly ease the process of getting out the door. Unless you have a friend who's willing to take you in at this point (so that you can keep the momentum you have with school), I don't see leaving now as being at all beneficial in the Big Picture.
 
Buy a birthday present for one of your parents, have it sent to your home. If they open it, make a scene about it being a surprise
 
Sorry, but I have to agree. for now, keep your diapers low key/hidden and focus on getting your diploma. If you can, also keep focusing on getting a job. Make this your after school, part-time job in its self. With a LOT of determination you can get one that won't interfere with you school. Look at temp agencies too. They can be very useful in finding temp jobs with the chance to become permanent.

Once your diploma and job end is secured, then get a car with a payment of at least under $200/mo. Find an ad from someone renting a room too. If you're lucky you can find one for around $200-300/mo. (which is cheap).

ps. It will help your credit rating immensely if you can get a credit card (any card, and limit). Get is asap, but DO NOT USE IT. Even six months of simply having a credit availability goes a long way in establishing a credit rating. This will help you more than you know in getting car and place to live.
 
497561832 said:
I'm working on it. I can't seem to be able to get a job, and even then I doubt I'd be able to hold one for very long. I do have a few hundred dollars that I've saved up, though. I'm trying hard to come up with a plan.
That's a great start! Take advantage of the free food and rent to save as much as you can while you plan. And don't stress about the plan too much at this point, you've got 6 months before you can really make a move on it anyway. The job stuff will likely start coming together as you get closer to graduation and businesses start looking to pick up summer help. For now I'd recommend brushing up on all of the "adulting" skills like creating a budget, doing laundry/cooking/cleaning, etc while you've still got the opportunity to practice.
 
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