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Thread: Battling Internalized Diaper Stigma

  1. #1

    Default Battling Internalized Diaper Stigma

    Hi guys,

    I started wearing Abena M4s to manage my nighttime pee urgency which was waking me up multiple times a night. It has really helped me get a better night sleep. I still battle the stigma of wearing diapers. Part of me feels guilty about it. I don't consider myself a ABDL, though I do find wearing a diaper very comforting (is this common?)

    I am getting used to waking up in the morning and changing out of my wet diaper (I still can't believe I wake up wet) and cleaning up to start my day. I am wondering if there are some other uses for diapers besides sleeping in them. Like sometimes I struggle to make it to the restroom when out in public. I get this sudden and strong urge to pee and I run to the bathroom. I often worry about not making it in time.

    Against my doctor's recommendation, I decided not to use medications to manage my urgency. I am on too many of them as it is for Asthma and other medical conditions that have me on a Diuretic. Would it be practical to use a diaper when going out?

  2. #2

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    Although as an ABDL, they're no fun at all to me, you might consider trying some of the Depends underwear-like pull-ups. They're not going to hold a lot but if your concern is leaking on the way to the toilet, they might do the trick. Some of us recreational wearers do stints of wearing all the time (the shorthand is wearing 24/7), so it's certainly practical if that's what you're after. There are also members here who are incontinent and wear constantly for need. If that's what you require, go for it.

    As a final note, if you like diapers enough that you'd still be thinking about them or wanting to wear them if you didn't need it, I'd say you're at least DL. Your intensity may be very low compared to mine but I think the important deviation is having that unusual desire for them. The averge Joe/Jane doesn't harbor any warm feelings toward diapers at all.

  3. #3

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    Quote Originally Posted by Trevor View Post
    Although as an ABDL, they're no fun at all to me, you might consider trying some of the Depends underwear-like pull-ups. They're not going to hold a lot but if your concern is leaking on the way to the toilet, they might do the trick. Some of us recreational wearers do stints of wearing all the time (the shorthand is wearing 24/7), so it's certainly practical if that's what you're after. There are also members here who are incontinent and wear constantly for need. If that's what you require, go for it.

    As a final note, if you like diapers enough that you'd still be thinking about them or wanting to wear them if you didn't need it, I'd say you're at least DL. Your intensity may be very low compared to mine but I think the important deviation is having that unusual desire for them. The average Joe/Jane doesn't harbor any warm feelings toward diapers at all.
    I guess I would be a mild DL, I just want to use them for their intended purpose. I have real reasons to use them. Waking up multiple times a night is not fun and ruins my day by making me sleepy.

    Are Pull-ups effective for overnight protection? I have tried some and they tend to leak for me.

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by iam32bit View Post
    I guess I would be a mild DL, I just want to use them for their intended purpose. I have real reasons to use them. Waking up multiple times a night is not fun and ruins my day by making me sleepy.

    Are Pull-ups effective for overnight protection? I have tried some and they tend to leak for me.
    If you just like them because they keep you dry, I'd say your "normal" cred is still pretty safe. It's when you'd wear them if you didn't have to that you take the (fun) trip to the dark side. I'm no fan of pull-ups in any situation since they're not fun for me. I consider them only technically diapers. I don't think they're great for anyone with a real bedwetting problem. However, if you're just concerned about leaks during the day, they'd probably do the job.

    For me, it needs to be something plastic backed, although I'm fine with thinner and fairly discreet. Depends Protection with Tabs were my workday goto diaper for a long time when I did 24/7 stints. Now that they've gone to clothlike backing, I'm still looking for the best replacement. It will probably wind up being either Northshore Care Supreme Lites or Tranquility ATNs unless someone else comes out with something I can use (looking at you, Tykeables for a replacement of the original Waddlers).

  5. #5

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    Quote Originally Posted by Trevor View Post
    If you just like them because they keep you dry, I'd say your "normal" cred is still pretty safe. It's when you'd wear them if you didn't have to that you take the (fun) trip to the dark side. I'm no fan of pull-ups in any situation since they're not fun for me. I consider them only technically diapers. I don't think they're great for anyone with a real bedwetting problem. However, if you're just concerned about leaks during the day, they'd probably do the job.

    For me, it needs to be something plastic backed, although I'm fine with thinner and fairly discreet. Depends Protection with Tabs were my workday goto diaper for a long time when I did 24/7 stints. Now that they've gone to clothlike backing, I'm still looking for the best replacement. It will probably wind up being either Northshore Care Supreme Lites or Tranquility ATNs unless someone else comes out with something I can use (looking at you, Tykeables for a replacement of the original Waddlers).
    I am not a fan of cloth backed diapers. I tried a few and they leaked. Even the M4 Air-Plus from Abena leaked. I am trying to find that perfect balance between price and performance for my needs. Wearing 365 Diapers per year can add up to a lot of money.

    The tykables are not plain white, I don't want prints or anything. I just want a plane Jane diaper that doesn't break the bank and can hold multiple wettings when I sleep without leaking.

    I tried wearing during the day to reduce the number of trips to the bathroom. There are some days when I go 10+ times. It is irritating when I am far from a bathroom and the urge strikes. It is sometimes painful to hold it in. I don't think I really want to wear 24/7. It is too much work and costs so much. So far I have been able to manage without diapers during the daytime.

    Seriously, I don't mind using them at night. It really is better than having to wake up and run to the bathroom in the dark. The alternative is taking more medications but that honestly cost more and introduces more side effects.

    I am a girl by the way, not sure if there are any female specific diapers out there.

  6. #6

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    Quote Originally Posted by iam32bit View Post
    I am not a fan of cloth backed diapers. I tried a few and they leaked. Even the M4 Air-Plus from Abena leaked. I am trying to find that perfect balance between price and performance for my needs. Wearing 365 Diapers per year can add up to a lot of money.

    The tykables are not plain white, I don't want prints or anything. I just want a plane Jane diaper that doesn't break the bank and can hold multiple wettings when I sleep without leaking.

    I tried wearing during the day to reduce the number of trips to the bathroom. There are some days when I go 10+ times. It is irritating when I am far from a bathroom and the urge strikes. It is sometimes painful to hold it in. I don't think I really want to wear 24/7. It is too much work and costs so much. So far I have been able to manage without diapers during the daytime.

    Seriously, I don't mind using them at night. It really is better than having to wake up and run to the bathroom in the dark. The alternative is taking more medications but that honestly cost more and introduces more side effects.

    I am a girl by the way, not sure if there are any female specific diapers out there.
    There are diapers made to appeal to women (and to sissies for that matter) but it's all appearances; there's no difference in the construction of the diapers themselves. (examples like https://diaperconn.com/product.php?id_product=61 or https://www.abuniverse.com/Lavender_p_154.html Although ABU Simple is slightly less expensive for having no prints, that's not the norm among ABDL companies. At this point with the market, you might wind up cheating yourself of the best diaper if you insist on plain white.

    For nighttime wear, I'd suggest trying a sample of http://www.northshorecare.com/diaper...me-briefs.html and seeing what you think. They're cheaper than Abena and although I haven't tried the ones I've received in a sample pack, they've gotten a pretty positive reaction from members here. The Supreme Lites are surprisingly high capacity for a "lite" diaper and the regular supremes hold more.

  7. #7

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    Quote Originally Posted by Trevor View Post
    There are diapers made to appeal to women (and to sissies for that matter) but it's all appearances; there's no difference in the construction of the diapers themselves. (examples like https://diaperconn.com/product.php?id_product=61 or https://www.abuniverse.com/Lavender_p_154.html Although ABU Simple is slightly less expensive for having no prints, that's not the norm among ABDL companies. At this point with the market, you might wind up cheating yourself of the best diaper if you insist on plain white.

    For nighttime wear, I'd suggest trying a sample of http://www.northshorecare.com/diaper...me-briefs.html and seeing what you think. They're cheaper than Abena and although I haven't tried the ones I've received in a sample pack, they've gotten a pretty positive reaction from members here. The Supreme Lites are surprisingly high capacity for a "lite" diaper and the regular supremes hold more.
    So the ABDL Diapers are better than Abena? Even though I am single, I do worry about someone seeing those babyish prints and taking things out of context. What about the Bambino diapers? Are they any good? I know they make plain white ones.

  8. #8

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    Diapers during your everyday routine can be challenging even for those of us that do/have needed 24 hour protection and are 100% ABDL.

    For daytime wear diapers are still best but pull-ons can be more discreet if you don't mind changing fairly often.

  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by Trevor View Post
    It's when you'd wear them if you didn't have to that you take the (fun) trip to the dark side.
    (fun) trip to the dark side... I like that one...

    As to the OP: think of your diapers as a medical device that helps improve your quality of life. Consider them the same thing as say, a wheelchair for a person who can't walk. The wheelchair helps that person in the same way as the diapers help you. That person probably isn't embarrassed about managing their condition with a wheelchair, so why should you be embarrassed about managing incontinence with diapers?

    As the other posters mentioned, I'd at least try pull-ups for daytime wear. Having some back-up sounds a lot more appealing than having to be in pain.

  10. #10

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    Quote Originally Posted by iam32bit View Post
    Hi guys,

    I started wearing Abena M4s to manage my nighttime pee urgency which was waking me up multiple times a night. It has really helped me get a better night sleep. I still battle the stigma of wearing diapers. Part of me feels guilty about it. I don't consider myself a ABDL, though I do

    Against my doctor's recommendation, I decided not to use medications to manage my urgency. I am on too many of them as it is for Asthma and other medical conditions that have me on a Diuretic. Would it be practical to use a diaper when going out?
    As a true ABDL or more of a DL...gave up bottles at age 17. I too have felt internalized shame. People learning about my fetish have shamed me angrily. If I had IC I would not be ashamed because diapers are a neccessity. That said, I put on a Teddy Bambino Diaper and wet it. Folded it up and took it out with the trash. Growing accustomed to wearing diapers must be hard but being a D-user I can see would be challenging. But for me I never wanted out of diapers. I was potty trained by age 2 (4 for bedwettings). I was always in search of a fresh diaper. From age 3 on. If you keep the temp in your place cool, wearing a diaper can be very relaxing, stroking the leg gathers, reminding yourself about what a naughty little kitten you are being in a babyish diaper...OOPS! My fantasy, not yours. Cheer up ole' matey. You are not alone.

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