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Thread: Having your partner expose you

  1. #1

    Exclamation Having your partner expose you

    Hi all, I have been into abdl and ddlg in one way or another since I was 5 years old. Its obviously been very private to me and I haven't told anyone since I decided to tell my boyfriend. I told him before we began a relationship but still had a very close bond. After a while we started getting into a routine where he would put me down for naps or bedtime and it became something very private and meaningful to us. We just recently decided to commit to a relationship and since then he told me that he told some of his friends about our routines a while back, used the term ddlg, and told them I was the reason he got into it. He told me it was because he was so excited about it and it was so new to him he had to tell somebody but at the same time he knew how much it would hurt me if this information got out. What bothers me even more is that I've had suspicion for a while that he told these friends this and he kept denying it until I made him spit out. I just need advice on where our relationship should go from here because I love him so much and he really is an amazing person but at the same time I feel so betrayed. If anyone has any advice, I'd really appreciate it.

  2. #2

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    That's a tough one. On the one hand, he betrayed your trust knowing that it would hurt you. On the other hand, he was excited, has been wonderful to you from the sound of things, and told his friends because he really wanted to share and didn't think it would cause any problems.

    It's a good first step that he's admitted it to you, and since you still think he's totally wonderful, I think I'd lean towards trying to keep the relationship together. But if you haven't already, you should have a talk with him where you tell him what you told us here, about how it made you feel hurt and betrayed, and make sure he understands why you're upset and how he's supposed to act when it comes to private topics in the future. If he betrays your trust a second time, though, I think that would be a dealbreaker if I were in that situation.

  3. #3

  4. #4

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    Hia

    I'm my opinion the fact that he told you means that he feels guilty about it. I wonder if him talking about it with his friends was his way of dealin with it, and coming to terms with our world. I would recommend a chat about how it hurt you, but you really appreciate his honesty. I would encourage him to talk about his thoughts and feelings (sexually) with you rather than his friends, but ultimately thank him for being honest, and wipe the slate clean. But make him very aware that your private life stays private from now on! Hope that helps x

  5. #5

  6. #6

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    looks like good advice has already been given here, gotta say i endorse it. we all do foolish things every now and then, its a shame to let something good disappear because of it.

    If he had posted pictures of you in little space without your permission, that would be a bit more off in my book.

  7. #7

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    Quote Originally Posted by princessstassie View Post
    Hi all, I have been into abdl and ddlg in one way or another since I was 5 years old. Its obviously been very private to me and I haven't told anyone since I decided to tell my boyfriend. I told him before we began a relationship but still had a very close bond. After a while we started getting into a routine where he would put me down for naps or bedtime and it became something very private and meaningful to us. We just recently decided to commit to a relationship and since then he told me that he told some of his friends about our routines a while back, used the term ddlg, and told them I was the reason he got into it. He told me it was because he was so excited about it and it was so new to him he had to tell somebody but at the same time he knew how much it would hurt me if this information got out. What bothers me even more is that I've had suspicion for a while that he told these friends this and he kept denying it until I made him spit out. I just need advice on where our relationship should go from here because I love him so much and he really is an amazing person but at the same time I feel so betrayed. If anyone has any advice, I'd really appreciate it.
    You need to lay down some serious rules. Hard limits. And that this is not acceptable.
    My mrs unfortunately has a tendency to bring up my incontinence when drunk, and while she speaks in a positive tone about reducing stigma and about how nasty people in my past have made fun of me and how she'd totally kick there asses, it still upsets me. Unfortunately i love her, and it is something i will have to accept as unlikely to change.
    Hopefully you can make him see what he has done wrong to you? Perhaps an example of something uou could say to people that would upset him could be used to explain if he's not getting how this affects you.

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