Help :/ Was talking to someone who wanted to be daddy - Anger in response to me asking for a pic/webcam clip for my safety

Hi guys
So I found this guy who wanted to be my daddy
However, when I said that I would need a webcam photo, or 5 second session on webcam to prove he is who he says he is, he responded by saying things like

"I feel rejected"
"Why should I have to show a photo of myself to someone I don't even know"
"you hurt me"
"I'll just leave you alone since that's what you obviously want"
I logged off skype because I didn't want confrontation and he said "You left me"
"I am going to quit everything in the near future"
"I am tired of people who act like my friend then treat me like shit like the majority of people who contact me"
"Good luck finding someone who won't use you"
Sent me paragraphs and paragraphs. Told me I had the rule for my safety because my husband cheated on me (??) Said I'm being different all of a sudden. Started talking about his "bitch ex". I mean the list goes on.

We were talking like friends prior to this. He wanted to be my daddy, I said that if you want to be my daddy, I just require a webcam photo or 5 second clip for safety (these are guidelines posted on a DDLG forum I follow that seemed very sensible, so I adopted them) and then he said all the above.

I don't know what to do. Currently I am just not saying anything back because I am kind of in shock. What would you do if you came across someone like this?

Run away. If he wont share photos or do a web cam, he (if he is indeed a he) has something to hide

Leave them. I've encountered people like this before; for instance, the first girl who wanted to be my girlfriend. She was domineering and wanted to know and control all aspects of my life. That relationship only lasted a week. Then after being left, she made a fake facebook in my name trying to ruin my social life at school. I had the account banned. One of the main things I told people to look for if it was me is either the image, or the way I type. The latter of the two is because I'll sometimes talk with an accent on certain words.

But yeah, the whole them getting overly defensive and hostile part is a major red flag. I do believe that possible-daddy was a Borderline (it is like one who experiences depression while in a state of mania, highly manipulative and a big danger to both self and others).

yea pretty cut and dry imo.

Danger Danger Danger.

NEVER NEVER NEVER sacrifice your own desire for safety and reassurance because someone might feel offended.

you are not obligated to do anything for anyone if you dont feel safe and positive.


"Good luck finding someone who won't use you"-Evidently, he admits he was going to use you, and is encouraging you in finding someone who wont. Used is such a dirty word in the symbiotic world we live in.

I''m not sure you need any help, it sounds like you already did the right thing and asked the right questions to see the bugs under the rock

Thanks guys!!! Yeah.. he's kind of scary. Sorry to hear the Facebook thing happened to you silentdreamer I just blocked him on skype because my real name and photo was on there. After seeing what you said, I ran over there and blocked. I hope he hasn't had that idea!

Yeah I mean I'm just sitting back looking at this his messages thinking "Wwwwhat the f***kkkkk!"

He would keep messaging me even when we were friends, saying "Oh I see you're online but you're obviously busy" when I wasn't talking to him straight away. It was this over and over and over. Dear lord...

I would quit while you are ahead, he sounds creepy and he could be a 70 year old man behind the screen

He said it was all because he hates his face, but even so, that response? Really??

- - - Updated - - -

I blocked him everywhere. thanks guys

That is very true Sisi!

I just told a friend about this and he said that he is a typical "nice guy" https://www.reddit.com/r/niceguys/

He hit the nail on the head!

Run away! Internet people seem to be a bad option.. I always just get into vanilla relationships and bring up DDLG/Dom/Sub relationships, they always instantly try to be a dom/daddy, I have never had a bad response.. plus I should imagine he would get worse in person! I recently had someone try to dominate me in a not so nice way and he was meant to be my daddy and was my best friend before that.. He got really angry when I didn't want to stay at his house and wanted to go home with my friends, he physically grabbed hold of me, not in a way that hurt me but so I couldn't leave.. all that night he had been grabbing hold of me and getting in my personal space when I was telling him to stop He also followed me when I did leave and didn't give up easy!

I'm of the following opinion:

If someone doesn't want to share their picture right away and want to get to know you first = Probably an okay person.
If someone flat out refuses to show a picture and wont specify why = Probably has something to hide and isn't an okay person.
If someone demands pictures of you = Not an okay person.
If someone demands pictures of you and refuses to send pictures of them self = Bad person
If someone has waited a few months, got to know you, shared pictures of things around their house like a pet or their car, or has voice chatted with you and wants to know what you look like and is willing to show you them self = The ideal internet person.

Its very hard to identify people who just don't want to show themselves and people who have things to hide, I personally don't like to show myself but that's because I'm trans and very self conscious about myself. That said I would NEVER respond like that person did if someone asked for my picture. I'd respectfully decline and wait until I knew them better. Oversharing on the internet is what gets people into trouble, if you share too much information people can use it to impersonate you, or stalk you, or all manner of things.

TLDR, If you're going to share your picture with someone or ask for someone's picture, talk to them a while first before exchanging photos of yourselves because you never know how someone is. Alternatively I recommend Skype video chat feature, if you have a webcam, you can point it away from yourself or cover it until the other person also shows up that way neither person can really hide anything. Of course that's the risk of getting a dick pic. . . So don't do anything that violates your safety.

AddyShadows brings up some really great examples, I would just add that there IS a difference between asking/pestering/demanding