I find that I still can't let's things go too well, I have s little bit but I find I have things I want to do but I find I waste my time away looking on Adisc all the time, wishing somebody to talk to me, I guess I feel scared that I am going to be rejected.
I want to play with my toys like any other little or child would, but I find I can't. I remember what happened to me and I make up alternative realities to what happened or try to make sense out of it and it's horrible, I wish I wouldn't do that. I get anxious that somebody that hates me is going to kill me or hurt me. I feel like I should talk to somebody and also talk about my little side.
I am scared the therapist is going to tell my dad because I a, young. I look young and last time it happened, I was 17, will I be young enough to have my dad told? I need to move on but I can't, should I go?