Confused

Angelic said:

What do they mean infantile sexual stimulation?, I never felt sexually stimulated or sroused when I was a baby! Do they mean emotional attachment to diapers or this this something else?

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Are you 100% sure? All the nerve endings and brain circuitry are there more or less from the get-go. Of course, a baby doesn't know what it all means, but it feels pleasure from sensations "down there". Diapers are rubbing "down there" a lot. You get the connection

Humans learn a lot through touch in early years. That's why many fetishes have something to do with touching sensations, body parts or clothing.

Of course, that's just one of the proposed theories, and it might not be the same for everyone.

Find some friends in ur area, fetlife is a good start, go to a munch and hang with like minded people, it eases the burden / isolation that you may be feeling.
I went to a littles munch yesterday, it was awesome, made some new friends and totally relaxed my thoughts of myself

I had questioned my feelings off and on for 40 years. I binged/purged a few times in my life. The last purge was forced, even though most of the things had not seen the light of day since before I was married. My wife had demanded everything had to go, it went. When the feelings returned after my wife's passing, I struggled a lot with them. I question my feelings, the grown man/diaper thing, a lot!

Why was I the way I was?

I never answered that question. After all these years I just gave into to myself and said " I don't know why I am this way but I am." I sleep better now. If I choose to wear diapers I do. And I feel better about myself. I will never know why I am this way and I am not hurting anyone by being myself. I do know I want to be happy and I have to accept myself if I want to be happy. I gave into my feelings and started over again with new things. As the song goes, "Don't worry, be happy."

Accept yourself as you are.

I appreciate all the feedback. It helps. I would definitely bet it would help to converse with someone in person, but this forum and feedback has helped me realize I'm not alone and shouldn't be ashamed of who I am. But applying that to life, having a wife and kids, just adds to the difficulty. Trying to potty trained my youngest while being hypocritical and wearing and using. Trying to get my wife to understand why I like what I like when I don't know myself (she is supportive, btw). Ya get what I'm saying?

eagle1 said:

I appreciate all the feedback. It helps. I would definitely bet it would help to converse with someone in person, but this forum and feedback has helped me realize I'm not alone and shouldn't be ashamed of who I am. But applying that to life, having a wife and kids, just adds to the difficulty. Trying to potty trained my youngest while being hypocritical and wearing and using. Trying to get my wife to understand why I like what I like when I don't know myself (she is supportive, btw). Ya get what I'm saying?

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Why do you think that you are being hypocritical? It's like saying that a BDSM couple is hypocritical because it doesn't beat up their children. Makes no sense. You can think of kinks as existing in a different realm than everyday life.

And it's pointless to ask why here... Why do I like diapers? I just do. I don't know and will never know why or how it started. But I know that it's integral part of what defines me. Yes, most people have a struggle before reaching acceptance of that "weird" part of their personalities. We've all probably been through that. But you come to realisation that you can't change it, and it's stupid to spend your whole life battling your deepest desires.

And if someone else doesn't accept me for who I am, well, it's their loss.

LavenderLynx said:

Why do you think that you are being hypocritical? It's like saying that a BDSM couple is hypocritical because it doesn't beat up their children. Makes no sense. You can think of kinks as existing in a different realm than everyday life.

And it's pointless to ask why here... Why do I like diapers? I just do. I don't know and will never know why or how it started. But I know that it's integral part of what defines me. Yes, most people have a struggle before reaching acceptance of that "weird" part of their personalities. We've all probably been through that. But you come to realisation that you can't change it, and it's stupid to spend your whole life battling your deepest desires.

And if someone else doesn't accept me for who I am, well, it's their loss.

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Well said. Thank you

for me I would not want to know im happy the way I am

It's purely a sensual thing. Why do we like big, hot, squishy booty?! It just feels nice having warm water in that area.