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Thread: I don't feel ready to go back to college!

  1. #1

    Default I don't feel ready to go back to college!

    I have used up all of my bereavement days and holiday days since I was off for a month, I still don't feel ready to go back to college, I am still having trouble sleeping and still feel really upset and not normal.

    For background information, my mom has been seriously ill in hospital and has died last month.

    I need to get back to college on Monday and I really don't feel ready as both my dad, nana and tutors are bugging me to go back! How can I fix my sleeping pattern by Monday night!? How can I make sure that I am not a wreck when I go back in front of everybody who doesn't know me!? I have been getting paid for the time off and now they say unless I go in, I won't get paid anymore!
    How can I get myself back to normal by Monday?

  2. #2


    I think the point of your problem is sleep patterns, I know we all have a different sleep patterns, but to be honest if you're hard to go college just because of sleep patterns then it's possible you are lazy, it's a bad habit that will disturb you when you want go to college, it has become common thing when we have long time off from school and going back felt like burden on the morning, but obviously I want to tell you that you must change your sleep patterns for more regularly because it could be part of laziness.

    If you find it difficult to wake up in the morning, it doesn't matter if you take a nap so that you have more rest because of you rarely sleep then your body will feel tired and hard to get up in the morning. Make sure you have much time in resting, but not be lazy, doing your college with best that you can.


  3. #3


    I literally fall asleep in college if I havn't had enough, I think I may have nacrocplepsy anyway, if I went I wouldn't be able to learn anything!

  4. #4


    Quote Originally Posted by Angelic View Post
    I literally fall asleep in college if I havn't had enough, I think I may have nacrocplepsy anyway, if I went I wouldn't be able to learn anything!
    So, my advice you should talk to the professional if you think you had narcolepsy, all i know about narcolepsy is neurological disorder that affects the control of sleep wakefulness, is better to talk to the professional about disorders, but if you can take care of yourself and be fine in the morning, that's not necessary, I hope you will be fine in college, Angelic.


  5. #5


    Hi, Angelic,
    I think the problem is that our lives are so filled with routine and we become slaves to it. When that routine is disrupted for any reason it can be difficult to establish a new one, especially following a significant loss in life.

    As a chronic insomniac myself, I can tell you how difficult it is for me if I've been away from a work because of vacation time or even a long weekend. Even though I've loved my work for many years, there is a bit of anxiety leading up to returning after an extended holiday. It's not an unusual symptom for most of people. I know that the dreaded 'night before' returning to work will be a long, frustrating, fruitless night of tossing and turning, broken only by the sound of the dreaded alarm. I've just come to expect it and I've learned to live with it. When I do return to work, it does take a few days to get back into the routine, but overall, things go fine and I'm happy to be back in the chaos. After a day or two of being back, I totally crash for a night, and things go back to normal. In all likelihood, you will have the same experience.

    Secondly, I think going back to school will actually be beneficial to your mental health, even though you're not seeing that right now. You've been through a very serious, significant life-altering loss in your life and I think it's important to reestablish some routine in your life. Perhaps you want o feel that you're over the loss of your mother before returning to school. I understand that, but speaking as someone who has lost too many people throughout the years, I can tell you, we never completely get over the loss. We remember them, we love them, and we carry a part of them with us throughout our lives, but we never become okay with the fact they're gone. So... the best we can do is carry on with our lives in their loving memory.

    I think the worst thing you can do is to let all your studies fall apart and jeopardize your future because you don't feel ready to return. There's no easy way to get back into it, but I have no doubt your teachers and classmates will help pull you through it and will also provide some ongoing support in the days to come. It's an important way to move forward with your own life and establish a new routine.. Dwelling on your loss, while avoiding the day-to-day life activity is counterproductive, and certainly not an answer in finding any peace of mind over the loss of your mother.

    Thirdly, I think the last thing your mother would want would be for you to either drop out or stay away from school to the point that catching up would be unfeasible.
    She would want you to succeed in school and take on all of life's challenges.

    If the anxiety is really getting to you or of you are suffering from narcolepsy, then I really think you should be treated by your doctor for this. Also, if sleep disruption is your main concern, there are a number of over-the-counter herbal remedies to help with insomnia that can act as a short term solution, such as melatonin or valerian.

    It's never easy getting on with your life after mourning the loss of a loved one. My best advice is to choose to live and to carry the best part of your mother with you. There's a time when you need to reconnect and rejoin the world after a sorrowful loss. There's never a perfect time to do this, but I think the sooner you do it, the better off you will be for it.
    Last edited by Starrunner; 02-Aug-2016 at 18:17.

  6. #6


    I am sorry for your loss, and I cannot truly understand the effect that would have on you. So, I will only touch on ways to change a sleep cycle.

    First and foremost, make sure you have your medical stuff in order. If you take any ADHD medicine or certain medications like Wellbutrin and have insomnia... You seriously need to work with your doctor to reduce the dose, change the dose, or something else. Taking an upper with a downer is a no-no, and if your doctor thinks thats a way to help sleep then at least get a second opinion.

    Do what you safely can to change your own sleep cycle. There are ways to do so on the internet not involving medicines or supplements. Googling things like mindfulness meditation can help. Try taking over the counter sleeping pills (they are nothing more than antihistamines, some are literally rebranded benydryl). Don't take more than the box says, or try 1-5mg of melatonin. Working your way up in dose if its not effective.

    Melatonin is probably the biggest take home of this. It totally works and is totally safe.

    Disclaimer- I am not a medical doctor, blah blah blah.

  7. #7


    Well, I remember a while back I had a classmate who had some concentration diffculties if I remember correctly. He went to an office in the college that offered help to him. They would appoint someone who would accompany him and would take notes and or an audio recording of the class session for him. I'm not sure how many colleges offer that, or universities for that matter, but do look into help from your college. Because they really do want you to succeed.

  8. #8


    there are sleep aids that you can buy at a chemist without seeing a doctor; melatonin and valerian root are non addictive. If they don't work ask your doctor about trazodone, its also not addictive and doesn't make you feel messed up. Trazodone basically does the same thing as melotonin; you just get very sleepy about 20-30minutes after taking it.

  9. #9


    I am back at college, I suppose my sleeping pattern will go back to normal soon after tonight. I have a day off tomorrow anyway.

  10. #10


    Good for you. It can take awhile to settle back into the routine but you'll be there before you know it. Getting started again is the hardest part.

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