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Thread: Affects of ABDL side in person's future

  1. #1

    Default Affects of ABDL side in person's future

    So, a few days ago I had a problem with my lecturer in college, she was the only one of my college lecturer who already know that I'm wear diapers, she and I have been talked personally about me in diapers, this is the third time she said the same thing to me like this:

    (My lecturer) Mrs. Wayne: "You will never grow up if you continuous like this, you future will be bad, how can you wear diapers in age like this."

    Is not mean I didn't understand her, but she said the same thing continuously, as if there are danger signs behind my "AB" side in my future.

    Well, my questions is:

    *Is the ABDL side will affect a person's future?

    *Is there are negatively behind side of ABDL it self?

    *What do you think about people who are busy taking care of other person's future, she is not my parent,
    I had to fight or follow?

    Me personally sure there's nothing wrong with this ABDL side, because I strongly agree with the statement of sticky about "Diapers do not ruled our lives"
    But I hesitated when she said like that , even make me hesitate to wear diapers again.

    What do you think about this, peoples.
    I will appreciate all answers and sorry if you find wrong about my english spelling.

    Thank you

  2. #2


    I guess what you're asking is if getting involved in AB/DL can be.. potentially harmful in some way?

    I mean, I think that it most absolutely could be.. but in the way that anything could be potentially harmful if you don't go about things in a responsible manner.

    To answer your third question first though, I think that it's important to remember that if she's actively trying to tell you that you should stop doing something.. she cares. How much she cares, obviously could be a question. It can be a thin and shallow idea of caring, but if she didn't care at all she wouldn't say anything. Try to remember this going forward. I think someone who is concerned about you has their heart in the right place, even if they are incorrect and/or going about it in a potentially offensive fashion.

    I think the most obvious negativity behind AB/DL itself is the simple matter is that it is still very much a social taboo. Social taboo's can absolutely negatively affect your life, and it's almost assuredly this angle that this person you know about in college is coming from. She is trying, perhaps, in her mind save you from the ramifications that indulging in this might have towards your employment, your future relationships, and in general most of your social interactions with other people. There are also many people who believe that when something is this sort of taboo, there is no "reason" in particular to indulge in it. Why continue to grow something inside you that will struggle for acceptance? Of course.. that's no reason to deny yourself, but I've seen the phenomena many times. Many people believe life is happier when you don't try to break the mold, when you just fit in.

    That being said, is there anything wrong with it inherently otherwise in the manner that I think indulging it promotes some sort of deviant or destructive behavior? I don't think so. Not unless you find something negative about the concept of being vulnerable, really. I get the impression some people do though.. some people feel people should be hardened and not make themselves squishy and sensitive. The sort of people crying on the television how we've gone soft and the like.

  3. #3


    I don't think there's a negative side to being an ABDL UNLESS it controls your life, or if you cannot accept it. Then you will have problems in the fruture.

  4. #4


    It won't control your life unless you let it! Plenty of people somewhere in the world will accept you and won't to be with you and your ABDLism. It won't ruin your job unless you post pictures online for employees to see. Don't let people say what you can and can't do because last night I told my dad about some fairy wings I found and he asked if I was taking things too far, I just want to be a child, is that ok for anybody!? I told him no as long as I don't go out in public with them, Bah! Why not!? I wish it was something people wouldn't tease people about!

  5. #5


    If your a self aware individual, your less prone to sliding down the fantasy slope to the point where you cant distinguish what is healthy and what is a selfish burden to those around you.

    the fact that it worries you, is an indicator that your aware of the dangers, and also it shows that you are less likely to unknowingly regress unintentionally.

    That said, as long as you are able to continually work to improve yourself, and you are NOT a burden to those around you, indulge as much as you please.

    Also, its ok to be a burden sometimes, everyone needs help. there is a line between sometimes and too much, find that line thats right for you and those around you.

    also, I think that helping another persons future does not mean that the helper's future is ruined in anyway, its equally likely to enrich it.

  6. #6


    I really don't think it's healthy to engage in these conversations with your lecturer at this point until she's shown a willingness to educate herself about ABDLism. It seems unlikely that you will change her mind on this, and the fact that this is affecting your own confidence is a sign that she is not being helpful. Unfortunately this happens when people who know absolutely nothing about this fetish feel they can tell you how it will destroy your life without having any understanding about the issue. Perhaps you could provide some articles and information about the topic and ask that she read them before giving an uninformed opinion. If she's not willing to do that, then let her know that you'll have to agree to disagree.

    Being ABDL is not harmful to yourself or to anyone else as long as you don't let it overtake how you live in the real world. As long as you control the behaviour and it doesn't control you, then you are doing just fine.

    She is your teacher, and therefore she is in a position of trust and authority: however even though she may be acting out of concern, she is not a therapist, nor is she qualified to be giving advice on an issue over which she has no knowledge, especially when her words are having a negative impact on your self-esteem and confidence.
    Last edited by Starrunner; 28-Jul-2016 at 18:14.

  7. #7


    Being an AB/DL is a cooping mechanism for dealing with stress. It can be like drinking alcohol, a more popular form of stress relief. If you partake in it on occasion, you'll be fine. If you do it too often, to the point of where it's preventing you from living your life as you normally would, then it's a problem. But having diapers rule over our lives isn't a widespread problem for us, it's hardly even a problem. Almost all AB/DLs know how to practice in moderation, so there's no risk of out hobby getting out of hand. In fact, I'd say that being an AB/DL is an even better form of stress relief, for people like us who are lucky enough to be one. After all, a diaper rash is much easier to treat than liver disease from drinking too much. Your professor most likely doesn't fully understand what it's like being an AB/DL, which is to be expected. If she brings this issue up again, just tell her the things we've told you, and she may begin the understand.
    Last edited by YoungYoshi; 28-Jul-2016 at 17:19.

  8. #8


    Since we don't have any control groups or double blind tests, we can't really know what effect being an ABDL has on people. We have some sites that gather statistics, which are based on self reporting and between that and a wide variety of people giving their perspectives and experiences, it seems to me that aside from liking a weird thing, we're pretty "normal".

    We have a strong tendency to suffer from early self-loathing and embarrassment due to our unusual desire. If killing the desire was practical, it seems like this is the time it would happen (and maybe for some, it does). The angst tends to fade over time as we gain life experience and/or interact with others like ourselves.

    Can it be destructive? Absolutely. Many things in life can. This one comes with additional social baggage but ultimately, it's just a part of us. It can be and is managed successfully by most of us. It can also be a source of good things under the proper circumstances (no one was more surprised than me to learn about that).

    In short, while your teacher clearly cares about your well being, her poor understanding limits her capacity to provide useful advice in this matter. I don't know what she lectures on but for the sake of argument, let's say economics. You wouldn't take her word as gospel on a matter of medicine unless she could demonstrate some relevant knowledge or experience. This is the same. You're free to take whatever advice you wish but I'd be careful to gauge the relevant knowledge of the source.

  9. #9


    Thank you for all your thoughtfulness, people.

    The point is control self no matter what, this will not overtake my life, as I had said in my introduction, the ABDL lifestyle in my neighborhood are still very rare known by some people here including my lecture herself still considered this is weird. I don't know if it was the principle of social taboo or related with ethics, it's clear that some of people here around me reject this AB's life, strange and weird to them.
    So when they seeing me like this, they considered this will be the threat for my future life.

    I will learn a some articles to make them understand.

    Thank you


    Thank you for your advice, Star! You are kind person I first meet.
    Feel sorry to me cannot send you any Messages.
    Last edited by AEther; 28-Jul-2016 at 17:51.

  10. #10


    Well, let me take more of a Muggle Advocate approach here: As I see it, the particular content of your teacher's comments isn't all that relevant to your question. She's been confronted with something she (likely) hasn't seen before, and is bound to generalize about it based on your example. That's totally excusable. And the reality is that your example is rather atypical of ABDL, because ABDL doesn't seem to occupy the same private place in your life that it does in most of ours. Most of us would never dream of telling a teacher that we wear diapers recreationally. Your teacher is likely responding from a place of concern, not for your diaper-wearing specifically (even thought she's saying that), but rather for your seeming lack of discretion in sharing what most would consider a very private matter.

    If you were into BDSM and your teacher remarked on your swollen wrists, would you volunteer that your girlfriend had handcuffed you to the bed the previous night, or would you find a way out of the question? "Yeah, ouch. I hope it goes down soon."

    Now, I'll stop short of labeling that kind of sharing as "bad" or "good", but I will say that it's a challenge most ABDLs face only in their most personal relationships--parents, significant others, spouses, etc. Most of us draw a clear line between ABDL and our adult lives. And, anecdotally, those who don't or can't draw that clear line do seem to be challenged in life. At the risk of some flames, I would say that they are generally less employed, generally less successful in relationships, and generally more prone to adopting a sort of disgruntled, "victim" mentality about why they have those problems. But look: Wearing diapers by choice is strange, and it's not getting less-strange in any kind of hurry. Strange things are generally not assets in the public's eye, and there simply aren't enough of us to really dent that.

    So yes! ABDL can be a problematic, along with so many other usually-private things. The bigger question is: How loose are your lips?

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