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Thread: Rejected for being abdl: My sad dating story

  1. #1

    Default Rejected for being abdl: My sad dating story

    I started an online dating profile I got a lot of attention. I decided to be honest with 1 of my many suitors. I told him that I was ABDL and what it means. I sent him a link to Bambinodiapers.com where I am a regular customer. He never wrote me back. I think he may have blocked me. I felt embarrassed a little but more disappointed. I kind of knew my fetish might be rejected by guys. But when it actually happens it makes me realize: Dating or Diapers? I can't be forced to choose. So for now, I chose diapers. I disconnected my dating profile for now. I can reinstate it anytime I want. Thoughts?

  2. #2

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    Well, I guess I'd say that if you feel compelled to bring diapers up right from the get-go, maybe add ABDL to your profile and then you won't suffer this particular setback again.

    My own rather simplistic theory is: The earlier in a relationship that you bring something up, the bigger a deal it will seem.

    So what you did might be fine...if what you're trying to say is: This is a really big deal.

    And that's easy enough to understand. We're naturally prone to extrapolating a person's whole being from whatever we happen to know about them, and if that isn't much, or is something we perceive as negative, then it expands like crazy to fill the void, and becomes a horribly distorted mockery of the actual person. So my advice would be: If you want the best chances, get to know a person really well before you introduce something that most people would consider odd or troublesome. Next to what that person has already learned about you, an interest in diapers will inevitably be a smaller thing than if it's flashing right on your profile, or comes up in the first email exchange. That's not to say it won't still be an issue and something that will have to be worked through, but it stands a better chance of being recoverable.

    But hey! You've probably got nothing to lose by creating a profile that mentions ABDL. Yeah, the glut of male ABDLs might require you to filter a tidal wave of responses, but you might spot a diamond in the rough somewhere in there. For males seeking ABDL females, the odds of success are a bit different.

  3. #3

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    I agree with the previous post. And it's too bad that that happened to you. There is that right person out there somewhere, and just might take some time to find them. Best of luck in your search and we're here for you to talk to.

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by extremecomfy View Post
    I started an online dating profile I got a lot of attention. I decided to be honest with 1 of my many suitors. I told him that I was ABDL and what it means. I sent him a link to Bambinodiapers.com where I am a regular customer. He never wrote me back. I think he may have blocked me. I felt embarrassed a little but more disappointed. I kind of knew my fetish might be rejected by guys. But when it actually happens it makes me realize: Dating or Diapers? I can't be forced to choose. So for now, I chose diapers. I disconnected my dating profile for now. I can reinstate it anytime I want. Thoughts?
    So sorry to hear that not a lot of guys have open enough minds... I go through the same thing when trying to do dating with women I've been through it 3 times they find out or you tell them and it's instant rejection city I wish I could find someone who would understand........

  5. #5

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    I think you guys are right. I should never have mentioned it. It's just such a huge part of my life but I think when I reinstate my online account, and I have a sexual partner for awhile, he may laugh about it instead of run for the hills. I love big men. Can't give them up either. I am tall woman, multiracial, tan skin, soft curls, 6'2". average build. White teeth. Cute haircut. Short natural curly. Plump lips. Just explaining why I get sooo many contacts even though I am 42. People say I look much better than others. I guess, but I remain humble. Really turned on by football player Tom Brady. He is like the sexiest man alive.

  6. #6

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    Quote Originally Posted by extremecomfy View Post
    I think you guys are right. I should never have mentioned it. It's just such a huge part of my life but I think when I reinstate my online account, and I have a sexual partner for awhile, he may laugh about it instead of run for the hills. I love big men. Can't give them up either. I am tall woman, multiracial, tan skin, soft curls, 6'2". average build. White teeth. Cute haircut. Short natural curly. Plump lips. Just explaining why I get sooo many contacts even though I am 42. People say I look much better than others. I guess, but I remain humble. Really turned on by football player Tom Brady. He is like the sexiest man alive.
    I would wait for a bit, when you do get back into it and start dating again I would attempt to find someone who is open minded and not afraid to try new things...you sound lovely btw and yes Tom is pretty hot

  7. #7

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    You might also try kwink.com that way being abdl is implied from the outset.

  8. #8

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    Is it usual on a dating site to mention all of one's fetishes, kinks, etc. up front? I'd think that it's assumed that nobody is just a plain "kiss, plain sex, done" kind of person when it comes to sexuality and that at some point people share their particulars.

  9. #9

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    Ah I get not everything is for everyone and the very least he could do is explain if he was no longer interested but maybe chalk these knocks up to people thinking they can leave their manners behind their keyboard.

    Don't give up!

  10. #10

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