I've been cynical, rude, and sarcastic. I've just not been sure how to cope. I know people have worse issues and I just keep on pushing people away and I'm sorry.
I don't expect those of you who are mad at my venting/raving posts to forgive me or even like me and I wouldn't if I were you. Maybe I shouldn't be so quick to dismiss venting... I have to do it better than I have. My only complain is that some people say I just make excuses and don't take advice.... I'm stubborn and I'm very much hard to tell what to do. I just want to be myself but I don't even know who I am anymore. I am sorry if you feel your advice ever fell on deaf ears. I need to keep on working on myself until I am finally better. I've reconsidered medication... I don't want to be a zombie but if it helps it helps. I've tried many medications that didn't help or made things worse. You all deserve better from me and I will be better. I need to start focusing on positive and stop absorbing only the negative. It all makes sense as to why people avoid me. I'm too dang negative. I hope all of you get better too and that your problems aren't as bad as they are now soon.