Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 16

Thread: Friends with IC

  1. #1

    Default Friends with IC

    Hi everyone! I know most of you probably don’t know me yet, but I’m gonna try to be a bit more active now that these last few, busy weeks are behind me. Also... I tried searching, but I'm not sure if a similar topic has already been posted. Sorry if this is a repeat!

    So over the past month, I have “come out” about my issues to two new people, both of whom (whether they were being totally truthful or just trying to be nice) told me about their own ic issues.

    One is a guy I’ve just recently started dating, and I told him about myself the second time we hung out (I typically would have waited a bit longer, but it was unclear how fast we were moving, and I didn’t want there to be any surprises had we ended up moving into the bedroom). He was extremely accepting, to the point of it really just being a non-issue, and then he told me about how he’s been epileptic his whole life, and regularly wets (and on rare occasions messes) himself when he has seizures.

    The other was an old high school friend who recently moved to my city. We were hanging out at his new place when nature called, and rather than awkwardly bailing or trying to come up with some weird excuse to go into his bathroom with my backpack, I just told him straight out about my issues. He too was very cool about it, and after talking a bit (post-change, of course) he told me that he apparently wets his bed about 2-3 times a month, and has done so pretty much his whole life.

    Now, their issues aren't anywhere close to the level I deal with (neither uses protection or anything), but it was nice to have that rare sort of connection with someone else in real life. Has anyone else here–for lack of a better word–confessed about their incontinence to either friends or family, only to have them reveal they also have similar problems?

    EDIT: Also, sorry for such a long post. It's hard for me to keep it short and concise :P
    Last edited by TXIC; 19-Jul-2016 at 14:08. Reason: typos

  2. #2


    I have been more open to some of my friends about my bedwetting and occasional overactive bladder (i don't wear during the day but if something makes me laugh a lot I pee). One friend I know always posts on her Facebook about Crohn's disease, I sent her a message about how I admire her for being so open and I then said I wish I was open like that with my condition. She then asked what my condition is? I told her I am a bedwetter and have occasional accidents if i laugh too much. She ended up opening up to me saying she has incontinence and uses protection 24/7. I never would have thought she wears diapers. Her and I are better friends now because of it. She has told me incontinence is a hard condition to be open about.

  3. #3


    Most of my friends know I am incontinent and wear nappies all the time and are cool with it.

  4. #4


    I haven't opened up to anyone except my fiancée about my IC, as I guess I'm just afraid of changing (no pun intended) our dynamic. I don't want their opinions or their misconceptions entering into it, although I guess I should put more trust in my friends.

    The other side of it is that I don't want friends trying to make special concessions for me due to my incontinence, when all I really need is a bigger garbage can haha.

    This all may change though, as a bunch of us are heading to a conference next weekend, and it may be close quarters - I might have to come clean. Thanks for the inspiring story though, it helps

  5. #5


    crowza – That's cool! I mean, not for her–I know Chron's is very difficult to live with–but that's pretty awesome y'all got to open up to each other like that! My old roommate has IBS and had 1 or 2 accidents while we lived together. I always thought about offering him a diaper, but obviously that's a bit weird... I did lend him my wipes on a few occasions though :P

    ST50 – It's nice when people are cool about it, huh?

    PlotTwist – Maybe it's me reading into things, but I feel like my relationships with the few people I've told have only ever gotten better afterward. For one thing, it's nice not having to stress so much trying to hide it around them, and it also always seems like our friendships become stronger and more open and trusting. I have had one friend who tried to give me "special concessions" though, and that was kind of awkward–just constantly asking me if I'm good, or if I need to take a minute in the bathroom, or whatever have you. I'm always just like... nope, I'll go to the restroom when I need to, thank you very much. Lol. Anyway, good luck with your conference! Let us know if you end up telling them or not

  6. #6


    I've had a very similar experience. I have a neighbor in his late 60's that I knew had had BPH and prostate cancer and that he had taken radiation treatment to eliminate the cancer. We were together on a drive and I mentioned that I was having some BPH incontinence related issues. He immediately opened up and told me about what he had gone through with his cancer treatments. He went on to say that he has to use some protection to control the minor urine leaks he still experiences. WOW, it was if a flood gate had opened up and we got into a terrific and very detailed conversation about both of our problems and how we are coping with them. It was obvious that it helped the both of us by getting all of this out in the open and talking face to face about our problems with someone else who really understands and wouldn't judge you.

  7. #7


    PadsnPullups – Glad you had such a good experience! It can be so cathartic, right? It's so nice talking about it with someone other than your doctor/therapist/parent/etc. Although, I still have yet to meet someone in real life who uses any sort of protection for it (beyond maybe a mattress cover). Really, I have yet to meet anyone else who would even consider themselves "incontinent"... the few I have met only seem to have very rare/inconsistent issues, and see it more as some sort of fluke, rather than a consistent problem to be dealt with.

  8. #8


    I went on an "internet expedition" we'll call it at one point looking for some statistics to see how likely it would be for me to find someone else near-ish to my age that has the same problem. Problem is, the way they rate incontinence prevalence in studies is by asking people if they've ever had leakage due to either stress or urge, not if they continuously have this problem. One study showed that as much as 68% of women were classified as "incontinent" due to this method (lol!) and another broke it down into demographics including smoking habits. The numbers actually lead you to conclude that continuing to smoke will make you less likely to develop urge IC. There's lies, damned lies, and statistics.

    That said, I think I came to settle on about every 1/200 people roughly have some sort of recurring problem, but I wish I could find the supporting info. The portion of them that doesn't play it risky and actually wears protection I'd imagine is even smaller.

    It would be cool if anyone has any better info about this and could share it, though.
    Last edited by PlotTwist; 18-Jul-2016 at 16:50. Reason: Fixed typo

  9. #9


    PT – Interesting stuff! I haven't gone on such "internet expeditions," but now I'm really curious to read more about this. I'm gonna try and do some digging around myself!

  10. #10


    I don't go around telling people about incontience, they don't need to know! Although I know of a girl that described her trip to the bathroom in quite a graphic way! I didn't want to know! I am sure your friends don't want to know where you go to the bathroom in and what you do! It's even a awkward moment to tell someone you are going to the toilet! I didn't know, better go in a diaper instead if toilets Rae so awkward!

Similar Threads

  1. looking for friends
    By scoo in forum Off-topic
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 03-Nov-2014, 23:42
  2. Replies: 10
    Last Post: 12-Mar-2011, 11:56
  3. hello my new friends
    By rwr44857 in forum Greetings / Introductions
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 26-Feb-2011, 19:55
  4. Getting to know who we are with a little help from our friends!
    By TickleMonster in forum Adult Babies & Littles
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 17-Feb-2011, 16:27

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  • - the Adult Baby / Diaper Lover / Incontinence Support Community. is designed to be viewed in Firefox, with a resolution of at least 1280 x 1024.