Thanks guys, I can't begin to imagine what the brother, grandparents and my dad is thinking, so we will help each other, I helped him out with housework and gave him plenty of hugs. My mom is at the stage where she can't even tell I am there, she could at one point because she held her arms out for a hug, but she is crying out in pain and screaming for her mom, I already had a laugh with her about our good memories together a couple of weeks back when I thought she was getting better. I am so glad that my last words to her will be "I love you", I feel guilty that I even hated her when I was in trouble with as a kid temporally, me and mom hadn't always been close until 2 years ago, I am just glad I had made an effort to be there for her once I had matured, some of the earlier memories of her still hurt but I would never wish this on her! I didn't want her to see me cry today but the nurses blown it by asking me if I was alright and if I wanted a tissue, so I kinda shouted at them, I feel guilty because they were helping mom, I should apologise when I next see them. My mom has always been sick since she was a toddler, epelespy, diabetes, kidney failure, something that means she can't regulate her body temperature and her legs swelling up and even bursting, when she goes to heaven if she goes yet, she will happy and healthy with no health conditions, I wish I got to see that mom instead of my sick one, but life isn't fair and it's too much for her, any more treatment or infections could kill her and the doctors are not going to resuscitate her as it's just cruel to keep doing that now, if she did get better at this stage, she would be in hospital for another month or so. I wasn't crying because I would not see her again, it was because she was agony.
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Thanks guys, I can't begin to imagine what the brother, grandparents and my dad is thinking, so we will help each other, I helped him out with housework and gave him plenty of hugs. My mom is at the stage where she can't even tell I am there, she could at one point because she held her arms out for a hug, but she is crying out in pain and screaming for her mom, I already had a laugh with her about our good memories together a couple of weeks back when I thought she was getting better. I am so glad that my last words to her will be "I love you", I feel guilty that I even hated her when I was in trouble with as a kid temporally, me and mom hadn't always been close until 2 years ago, I am just glad I had made an effort to be there for her once I had matured, some of the earlier memories of her still hurt but I would never wish this on her! I didn't want her to see me cry today but the nurses blown it by asking me if I was alright and if I wanted a tissue, so I kinda shouted at them, I feel guilty because they were helping mom, I should apologise when I next see them. My mom has always been sick since she was a toddler, epelespy, diabetes, kidney failure, something that means she can't regulate her body temperature and her legs swelling up and even bursting, when she goes to heaven if she goes yet, she will happy and healthy with no health conditions, I wish I got to see that mom instead of my sick one, but life isn't fair and it's too much for her, any more treatment or infections could kill her and the doctors are not going to resuscitate her as it's just cruel to keep doing that now, if she did get better at this stage, she would be in hospital for another month or so. I wasn't crying because I would not see her again, it was because she was agony.