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Thread: Being Daddy is Stressful?

  1. #1

    Default Being Daddy is Stressful?

    I've been in a long distance relationship with my Daddy for five months now. Recently he told me the being Daddy can be stressful and he sometimes has to force himself into the mindset. Is being Daddy hard? Do you have to work to be in the mindset? . . . I don't want to cause him stress by forcing him to be Daddy

  2. #2

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    I'm pretty new to being a daddy myself. It is a lot harder then I thought it would be! It is still enjoyable, however. If he has to work to be in the mindset, maybe he's just not into it like you expect. A few things that would help your daddy not be so stressed out is make sure he gets his space when he needs it and try not to demand his attention ALL the time. I get most littles are pretty needy, which is fine, but try to find that boundary between being a cute kind of needy and being ungodly overbearing.

  3. #3

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    im not quite a daddy but i tend to watch out for a little i know from the uk. long distance daddy/baby relations are going to be pretty hard because of the distance. mostly i think junglejake is right, just make sure you don't get too clingy and needy. maybe ask if he needs some space. and sometimes it's just that he's not able to get into the mindset so you have to just respect that and wait

  4. #4

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    The problem is, he never says he's not in the mindset. He just sees that I've fallen into Little space and jumps in. And then he says he wanted to be Daddy then, but he always seems tired or stressed or worn out afterwards . . . I don't want to be a source of stress for him . . . I want him to be happy that I'm his little . . . Not stressed because its another responsibility . . .

  5. #5

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    I am a daddyfur to my cub who lives in singapore. You don't need to see face to face to have a vivid connection.

    Just skype (video calling) and a messenger service (like telegram)

    It's been 6 months for us (non-sexual connection) which is an example I'll give for you.

    Sometimes, stress comes out for like if your daddy finds another cub instead of you, leaving you forever, dropping off the radar, or what you mentioned "just tired of it for certain days" that is bound to happen for some days but what you gotta do is just play friend by friend for certain days and eventually the strings come closer and closer. You can calm things like online video gaming, read aloud stories to each other, etc.

    Really, your main tasks as a daddyfur is to care for your cub as in give as much love and attention as possible, talk and play with him/her, and maybe surprise with little gifts and such. There should never be anything stressful as a bond of a daddy and their cub. If it ever gets to that point, just slowly back away and space wise to ask what they want to do such as talk normally for a bit, video game wise, cub themselves till you want attention again, etc. It's hard but to me, it's not hard and I've been a daddyfur for 6 months and it really should be hard for me with my living conditions.

    It is NOT stressful if it's only been 5 months, maybe he hasn't fully adapted yet to the entire idea so ask what he thinks of it so far, what are the pros and cons, and what should be foxing. If it is still stressful, you're better off taking a break.

  6. #6

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mandychan View Post
    The problem is, he never says he's not in the mindset. He just sees that I've fallen into Little space and jumps in. And then he says he wanted to be Daddy then, but he always seems tired or stressed or worn out afterwards . . . I don't want to be a source of stress for him . . . I want him to be happy that I'm his little . . . Not stressed because its another responsibility . . .
    My guess is that he's worried he's not meeting expectations. We littles actually do want a lot sometimes and we can often be very particular. You might want to ask him if he can say what it is that he finds stressful, and if he has trouble saying, maybe you could help him figure it out (but only at a time when he's comfortable chatting). Ask if he finds you hard to please, or if there are parts of your playtime where he feels like he doesn't know what to do and which parts those are. Keep track of how often you've been little with him (just make a spreadsheet for a week or two, nothing is more helpful than actual facts in these conversations). Maybe make a list of what sorts of things you like and if there's anything you expect but haven't really been getting. And of course ask him how he's doing and if he has anything else going on in his life.

    It could also be totally unrelated to you by the way. Like, when I'm busy at the work for several days in a row, I can be kinda stressed and short with everyone, even though from some people's perspective I've only been talking with them for a few minutes. We all have a limited amount of energy and there are times when other parts of life suck it away. So don't jump to conclusions and be there to help support him.

  7. #7

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    Recently I became a daddy, but I'm a switch between baby boy and daddy. I don't think it's too difficult, my little girl isn't needy and I like speaking to her a lot.

  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mandychan View Post
    I've been in a long distance relationship with my Daddy for five months now. Recently he told me the being Daddy can be stressful and he sometimes has to force himself into the mindset. Is being Daddy hard? Do you have to work to be in the mindset? . . . I don't want to cause him stress by forcing him to be Daddy
    Was in the same situation as your beau for like six months. It was stressful to me because of the attention requirement that had to be filled either over text, skype or long distance without having the little there precipitate "daddy mode."

    For me its really easy to get into the role when my little is around, but a lot harder to do if I'm texting her while doing something else.

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